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Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/Assessment/Donald Wilson (general)

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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

Donald Wilson (general) edit

Nominator(s): Hawkeye7 (talk)


An unusual article on an American air general. Like Kenneth Walker, he was a key figure in the doctrine debates of the 1930s. World War II was not kind to these thinkers. Hawkeye7 (talk) 20:59, 2 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]

  • Comments Support Comments addressed. —Ed!(talk) 22:28, 6 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
    • "This unit was called to active duty at Laurel, Maryland in June 1916 for service on the Mexican border," -- this doesn't specify if he actually went on the expedition or if his unit was just garrisoned nearby as it happened.
      • Like almost all NG units, it was the latter. I have clarified this. Hawkeye7 (talk) 20:48, 6 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
    • WWI section: " in response to an appeal from AEF headquarters." -- should spell out what AEF stands for.
    • "2nd Corps Aeronautical School at Châtillon-sur-Seine." -- Are you referring to U.S. II Corps?
    • I recall in ROTC learning that the industrial web theory led to some technology development for strategic bombing which was then used in WWII. Maybe a little context would help?
      • Added a bit. industrial web theory has its own article, so I didn't want to give more than a summary here. Hawkeye7 (talk) 20:48, 6 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Can't find a lot of issues with the article, so I'll leave it at that. —Ed!(talk) 18:29, 6 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • CommentSupport
    • No dab links [1] (no action required).
    • One external links reports as dead [2]:
      • The Origins of Joint Military Professional Education
        • They moved it. Switched to a new link,. Hawkeye7 (talk) 17:56, 12 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
    • Images lack Alt Text [3] so you might consider adding it (suggestion only - not an ACR requirement).
    • The Citation Check Tool reveals no issues with reference consolidation (no action required)
    • Images are all PD and are appropriate to the article (no action required).
    • The Earwig Tool reveals no issues with copyright violations [4] (no action required).
    • Quite a number of duplicate links:
      • Army Air Forces
      • United States Army Air Forces
      • Baltimore
      • Alabama
      • Washington, D.C
      • Industrial College of the Armed Forces
      • National War College
    • Also some duplicate links in the references section but I'm not really certain of the policy on that.
    • "all instructors at the Tactical School, who became known as the "Bomber Mafia."" By whom? Could this be clarified?
      • Not sure. It appears in many books, including the title of this one. I've found it in over 20 books on the shelves here. It seems to have been bestowed by the aviation historians. Hawkeye7 (talk) 17:56, 12 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
    • Otherwise this seems very good to me. Anotherclown (talk) 11:00, 12 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Support Comments Interesting to read of the reasoning behind the US conducting daylight bombing. Not much to nitpick here, but I did make minor tweaks to the text in a few places.

  • "The 5th Maryland Regiment returned to Baltimore in February 1917." There is no mention of the regiment being in Baltimore at all prior to this..
    • Anne Arundel county is half way between Baltimore and Washington. Changed to "Maryland". Hawkeye7 (talk) 09:23, 13 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "his request was disapproved." Disapproved seems to be an unusual term to use here. Unless it has a specific meaning in military terminology I would suggest replacing with not approved or declined.
    • It is military terminology. Changed anyway. Hawkeye7 (talk) 09:23, 13 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The school embraced the doctrine that strategic bombing was the most important aspect of air power, but Wilson rejected those parts of the doctrine of Giulio Douhet that called for mass bombing of cities to break the morale of the enemy". This sentence doesn't flow well, particularly the second part. Perhaps this: The school embraced the doctrine of air power theorist Giulio Douhet, who argued that strategic bombing was the most important aspect of air power. However, Wilson rejected those parts of Douhet's doctrine that called for mass bombing of cities to break the morale of the enemy.
  • Neurasthenia. Should the lower case n be used? Upper case used both in lead and main body of article.

That's it for me. Zawed (talk) 08:45, 13 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Comments. As always, feel free to revert my copyediting. Please check the edit summaries. - Dank (push to talk)

  • "one of the leading theorists...during the thirties": spaces around the ellipsis, and attribute quotes.
  • "railroads, where critical breaks could disrupt the entire system": Is this just saying that trains can't travel on a broken rail line?
    • Yes, that is what a break is. The point is that railroads can re-route to minimise disruption, but in some cases breaks can cause disproportionate disruption. There is a branch of mathematics here, called network topology. I might add that the enormity of the intelligence effort required to identify critical points was not really considered until World War II. Hawkeye7 (talk) 07:10, 15 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Wilson accepted the argument, most forcibly advanced by fellow instructor Kenneth Walker, that fighter aircraft did not have the range or speed to accompany bombers and probably could not shoot them down. Wilson termed this doctrine "industrial web theory".": That doesn't seem like an industrial web theory ... maybe move that bit?
  • Otherwise, So far so good on prose per standard disclaimer, down to where I stopped, about two-thirds of the way, at Donald_Wilson_(general)#World War II. These are my edits. - Dank (push to talk) 04:31, 15 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page, such as the current discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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