Talk:Sam Mirza/GA1

Latest comment: 17 hours ago by Amir Ghandi in topic GA Review

GA Review

edit

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Nominator: HistoryofIran (talk · contribs) 23:47, 12 September 2024 (UTC)Reply

Reviewer: Amir Ghandi (talk · contribs) 09:34, 20 September 2024 (UTC)Reply

I'll gladly take this one. Amir Ghandi (talk) 09:34, 20 September 2024 (UTC)Reply

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, spelling, and grammar):   b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):  
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable, as shown by a source spot-check.
    a (reference section):   b (inline citations to reliable sources):   c (OR):   d (copyvio and plagiarism):  
    The article uses reliable sources (Earwig gives a 13.8% chance of copyright violation, which means it is unlikely. The main overlap with the top matches seems to be the titles of books) Spot checks confirm that Roxburgh 2000, Newman 2008 and Reinert 1995 discuss the topic
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects):   b (focused):  
    The article is compliant
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:  
    The article is compliant
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:  
    The article does not suffer from edit wars
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have non-free use rationales):   b (appropriate use with suitable captions):  
    I suggest adding alt text for the images. Otherwise, the images are properly licensed and are suitably used.
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:  

Lead section

edit
  • "Lingering zenith" Does not make sense, I would change it to "Remnants of the zenith"
Done. --HistoryofIran (talk) 14:38, 24 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • "despite his attempts to apologize" I presume he is apologizing to Tahmasp? Then it should be mentioned that Tahmasp is his brother and the shah
Done. --HistoryofIran (talk) 14:38, 24 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • "The work reflects his deep engagement with Persian literature" I think there should be a 'the' before Persian literature
Sorry, but are you sure? Sounds a bit wrong grammatically. --HistoryofIran (talk) 14:38, 24 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
Hmm, okay then, I leave this one out. Amir Ghandi (talk) 14:45, 24 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • "for alleged" to "for an alleged"
Done. --HistoryofIran (talk) 14:38, 24 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • Mention his offspring in the third paragraph? For example: "He was survived by..."
Done. --HistoryofIran (talk) 14:38, 24 September 2024 (UTC)Reply

Background

edit
  • "Owing to Ismail I's fondness" to "Due to Ismail I's fondness"
Done. --HistoryofIran (talk) 14:38, 24 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • Mention that Sam is a character from Shahnameh?
Done. --HistoryofIran (talk) 21:56, 25 September 2024 (UTC)Reply

Career

edit
  • Since there is no map in the article, I suggest adding some geographical contexts. For example, mention that Herat is in modern-day Afghanistan
Done. --HistoryofIran (talk) 21:58, 25 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • "thus succeeding" omit 'thus'?
Done. --HistoryofIran (talk) 14:38, 24 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • "At Herat, Sam Mirza witnessed both the lingering zenith of Persian culture from the reign of the Timurid ruler Sultan Husayn Bayqara (r. 1469–1506) and his guardians getting him involved in their struggle for power" to "During his time in Herat, Sam Mirza experienced the remnants of the zenith of Persian culture under the Timurid ruler Sultan Husayn Bayqara (r. 1469–1506) and was involved in the power struggle of his guardians."
Done. --HistoryofIran (talk) 14:38, 24 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • "this event ruined concluded" omit one of the verbs.
Done. --HistoryofIran (talk) 14:38, 24 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • "against the Uzbeks." Mention that these Uzbeks are from Bukhara?
Done. --HistoryofIran (talk) 21:56, 25 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • Can you add a note explaining the "hunar numudan"?
Unfortunately the source doesn't explain it, and I can't find anything else on it (not in English at least). --HistoryofIran (talk) 21:56, 25 September 2024 (UTC)Reply

Literary work

edit
Done. --HistoryofIran (talk) 21:56, 25 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • "It was said to encompassed" I think it should be 'encompass'
Done. --HistoryofIran (talk) 14:38, 24 September 2024 (UTC)Reply

That's all my points. Once these are addressed and done with, I can pass the article. Amir Ghandi (talk) 06:27, 21 September 2024 (UTC)Reply

Hi again Amir Ghandi. Thank you for very much for the review, I'll look into it in the upcoming days. HistoryofIran (talk) 00:49, 22 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
@Amir Ghandi: I think I've addressed all the issues now. Thoughts? HistoryofIran (talk) 21:58, 25 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
@HistoryofIran Looks good! Congratulations, passed. Amir Ghandi (talk) 06:07, 26 September 2024 (UTC)Reply
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.