Talk:Globaloria

Latest comment: 8 years ago by Oleander2323 in topic clean up and shorten ?

clean up and shorten ? edit

My feeling is that this article would benefit from a "tightening" of the text. ---- Stormbay (talk) 18:32, 16 November 2007 (UTC)Reply

Completely agreed, see my below comment. Oleander2323 (talk) 19:55, 5 August 2015 (UTC)Reply

The Way The Article Was Written... edit

The way this article was written sounds like it was by a member of Globaloria or the World Wide Workshop people. It uses the word "student" in the article more than what would be exactly needed in it.

I suggest it be written to not include such words as "innovative" (and/or variations thereof) or "immersive".

There is also no need for the tagline of one of the members either, as that itself makes it seem if it was written by a member of their staff.

I'd rewrite it myself, but I don't know enough of the topic to do so. 168.216.16.50 (talk) 16:08, 19 February 2010 (UTC) Definitely needs to be rewritten. It seems like an advertisement. — Preceding unsigned comment added by 108.6.247.7 (talk) 04:27, 22 September 2014 (UTC)Reply

I'm working on this in conjunction with cleaning up the article about the CEO, since there's a lot of unnecessary cross-pollenation. Will be cleaning up the biased, self-promoting language in addition to the tightening up. Oleander2323 (talk) 19:54, 5 August 2015 (UTC)Reply