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Latest comment: 2 years ago4 comments2 people in discussion
Since the main user behind this article has unfortunately been blocked, to whoever's doing the GA review, I can respond to suggestions from the review to help improve the article if needed. Just putting this here to make it clear it's not abandoned, would love to see this become a GA! --LivelyRatification (talk) 01:00, 8 August 2021 (UTC)Reply
@LivelyRatification: Oh no :( If you want, you can remove the GA tag entirely and renominate the article yourself. That way, you get notified when the nomination gets picked up, and Shoot for the Stars' talk page doesn't get cluttered with notifications. You can learn how to do this at WP:GAI. Thank you for taking initiative! D🐶ggy54321(let's chat!) 02:35, 8 August 2021 (UTC)Reply
Link to the lyric video in here; take "All Mine" for example
"Pop Smoke featuring English singer Dua Lipa." → "Pop Smoke, featuring English singer Dua Lipa from the former's..." mentioning the album here instead and adding a comma before its title
Writing/production sentence should be the second one of this para
"The song was released to" → "It was released to" and mention the labels after the United States
"Six days later, the album's track listing was revealed," → "The track listing for Faith was later revealed on July 15, 2021,"
The writing/production sentence should be the last of the first para instead, as release info belongs at the end
The first sentence of the second para would be more accurate to say that Pop Smoke's second posthumous studio album Faith was released via the labels, including the song as the sixteenth track
"chart,[29] number 28" → "chart,[29] and number 28" ending the sentence at the Mainstream Top 40, as charts are ordered geographically so Global 200 should be at the very end of the section
"the song debuted and reached it's peak of" → "the song debuted at" plus you need the chart histories of these two artists to back up the top 40 stats
Remove Portugal and Switzerland because positions below the top 100 are not notable
Where are the vintage and VRAM ring parts sourced?
The Nylon source - "wearing a vintage corset piece from Jean Paul Gaultier’s Spring 1998 couture collection, as hinted by stylist Lorenzo Possoco on Instagram, and Vram jewelry." --LivelyRatification (talk) 00:37, 18 November 2021 (UTC)Reply
"couture collection[47][46][48] with" → "couture collection,[46][48] with" since [47] should be solely at the end of the sentence
"of her head[46][50][51]" → "of her head,[50][51]" with [46] being solely at the end of the sentence
"petticoats, ruffled sleeves" → "petticoats, and ruffled sleeves"
"and are seen" → "with them being seen"
"which comes to" → "with a painting coming to" or something similar, to be specific
What is the use of [41] in the sentence about the painting's depictions?
Remove wikilink on Rolling Stone
"is mimicking Italian artist" → "mimics Italian artist"
"is then seen as a" → "is later seen as a"
"a table rapping" → "a table, rapping"
"Lipa who is seen descending down a" → "Lipa, who is seen descending a"
"in the festivities and performs" → "in the festivities, including performing"
@LivelyRatification: Most of this looks good now, but you need to swap the writing/production and release sentences in the lead, start the release one with "It was" and remove wikilink on Rolling Stone in the music video section - sorry about this point, I must have accidentally pressed enter too soon when typing remove. --K. Peake 07:15, 18 November 2021 (UTC)Reply
@LivelyRatification: You still need to begin the third sentence with "It was released..." but nice job elsewise. --K. Peake 07:33, 18 November 2021 (UTC)Reply
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On hold after a nice quick review; waiting until everything is resolved! --K. Peake 13:42, 17 November 2021 (UTC)