Wikipedia talk:Today's featured article/May 23, 2006

Latest comment: 17 years ago by 81.157.113.170 in topic Errors

Errors edit

This paragraph seems to me to be very awkward to read. The first sentence does not make sense as it's been formed from two different sentences in the article's lead that have been stuck together incorrectly. The next sentences are slightly overwhelming as they are simply a barrage of dates and facts that seem to have been crammed in at the expense of the elaboration in the lead of the article; I end up skipping most of the paragraph as I simply can't read all that at once.

Also, the apostrophe from 'mid-1800's' should be removed to make it mid-1800s (I omitted the inverted commas for clarity).

I don't mean to be overly critical but I think that paragraph could do with a slight rework. 81.157.113.170 12:36, 20 May 2006 (UTC)Reply