Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates/Give Peace a Chance (Grey's Anatomy)/archive1

Addressed comments from Crisco 1492 edit

Prose comments from Crisco 1492
  • "American television medical drama" - Is television necessary here? "American television medical drama" sounds awkward to me.
  • Isaac, Shepherd, et al. have no last name?
    • I addressed the Shepherd one (can't believe I missed it), but Isaac's last name is never given. TRLIJC19 (talkcontribs) 03:13, 21 August 2012 (UTC)Reply
  • "mess up" - Not formal. Perhaps "make a serious mistake"
  • "personal doctor" - What does this mean in this context?
    • She reminds him to eat/drink, helps him when he's tired, etc. I've changed it to "caregiver". TRLIJC19 (talkcontribs) 03:13, 21 August 2012 (UTC)Reply
  • "Nowalk said those scenes were difficult to shoot." - Why?
  • "Dr. Robert Bray, a neurosurgeon in Los Angeles." - Related to the show how?
    • That's where the storyline about the tumor originated. TRLIJC19 (talkcontribs) 03:13, 21 August 2012 (UTC)Reply
      • How would he know the producers, is what I meant. Was he signed as an advisor or something? — Crisco 1492 (talk) 03:25, 21 August 2012 (UTC)Reply
        • No further context on that was given in the source, unfortunately. TRLIJC19 (talkcontribs) 03:29, 21 August 2012 (UTC)Reply
  • "drew on the wall" - don't use this if it's not in the literal sense. If its figurative, at the very least link to fourth wall
    • No, he actually drew a diagram on his bedroom wall with markers. TRLIJC19 (talkcontribs) 03:13, 21 August 2012 (UTC)Reply
  • Fix the CN tags (direct quotes = immediate source)
  • That's it from me. — Crisco 1492 (talk) 02:57, 21 August 2012 (UTC)Reply