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Wikipedia:WikiProject Biography/Peer review/Bullet for My Valentine

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Bullet for My Valentine

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This article was in really bad shape so i decided to completely re-write it. Hope to make it a Featured Article. M3tal H3ad 11:42, 8 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]

LuciferMorgan

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Comments;

Thanks for the comments. M3tal H3ad 04:55, 9 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]

J Milburn

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  • Sorry to mention the same trivial thing twice, but does the logo have to be that big?
  • Considering how important so many people consider it, perhaps a reference for the metalcore claim?
People aren't concerned about the metalcore thing mainly when someone adds thrash metal/other genre. M3tal H3ad 04:15, 9 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]
  • Kerrang! is a periodical, it should be in italics.
  • "A record deal"- the definite/indefinite article should be avoided in page and section titles unless part of a proper noun. 'First record deal' would be a better section title.
  • "A second EP (often referred to as a mini album) entitled, Hand of Blood, was released" The comma use isn't quite right here. I think the comma after "entitled" should be moved to after "EP".
  • "The Poison" should be in italics, even in the section title.
  • "Since its release, the album has sold 330,000 copies." Perhaps this should add "as of [date]".
  • "Promoting Poison"- Since the album is named The Poison, this section should probably be entitled 'Promoting The Poison'.
  • "the larger Snickers stage,"- I'm unfamiliar with the stage; do we have an article? If not, could you perhaps explain in the article?
  • Barfly links to a DAB page.
  • "tours the band embarked on include opening for Metallica and Guns n Roses" Probably best to change that to "Guns N' Roses".
  • "The Poison: Live at Brixton"- That should be in italics, I think.
  • "Vocalist of fellow support act Lacuna Coil, Andrea Ferro, attributed the behaviour due to inexperience; "Probably they got some different kind of success in the U.K. in the beginning and they think that they paid their dues, but I believe that they still have to pay their dues, like everybody.[18]"- You forgot to close the speech marks.
  • Some tours have been put in italics, some haven't. I am actually not sure if there is any consensus on this, but it would be best if the article was consistent.
  • "Machine Head replaced the band as supporting act." Perhaps link to Machine Head?
  • "Scream, Aim, Fire", the section title, should be in italics if the section is about the album (as I suspect) or perhaps speech marks if you think it is about the single.
  • "from the band's upcoming album of the same name" 'Same name' doesn't need to be in italics.
  • The blockquote appears to be unreferenced.
  • "what our fucking hair looks like"[2]." The reference should be after the punctuation.
  • "The Sun, the band were 'booed' when receiving the 2006 Metal Hammer" The Sun and Metal Hammer are both periodicals.
  • "Metal Hammer and Kerrang, and stories in Revolver, Outburn, Penthouse, Rock Sound, NME, Hit Parader, Guitar One, and Alternative Press" Many more periodicals, not to mention Kerrang! should have the !.
  • The bottom of the table isn't showing in the discography section, it probably just needs an additional |}.

Very well written article, as usual. Well done. J Milburn 19:37, 8 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks again for the comments. M3tal H3ad 04:15, 9 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]
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