Wikipedia:Peer review/South Yemen/archive1

South Yemen

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I've listed this article for peer review because I want to know what should i do to turn this article into a GA.

Thanks, Abo Yemen ✉ 06:07, 27 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Z1720

Comments after a quick skim:

"In addition to all that was the sheikhdoms' differences over the who should be the president of the federation." Needs a citation, although this is an awkward sentence and might need to be reworded.
The "British rule and decolonization" is quite long. Is there a way to split this with new level 3 settings?
"However, these plans were put on hold in 1979, as the PDRY funded Red rebels in the YAR, and war was only prevented by an Arab League intervention. The goal of unity was reaffirmed by the northern and southern heads of state during a summit meeting in Kuwait in March 1979." Needs a citation
"His successor, Ali Nasir Muhammad, took a less interventionist stance toward both North Yemen and neighbouring Oman." Needs a citation.
What is the history of the region after reunification? Is it an independent administrative area?
The "Demographics" section is quite short, and from 2000. Any updates on its demographics today? Any census data to pull from?
"Legislature and judiciary" and "Sports" are uncited and will need citations.
"The national budget was 13.43 million dinars in 1976, and the gross national product was US$650 - 500 million. The total national debt was $52.4 million." Needs a citation.
Second paragraph in "Oil" needs a citation.
Citation for Aden Airlines should probably be at the end of the bullet point if it verifies the information.
"Alyemda – Democratic Yemen Airlines (1961–1996). Joined Yemenia, the airline of the former YAR" Needs a citation.
Many citations are used multiple times but have separate food notes, like "Fred Haliday Revolution and Foreign Policy: The Case of South Yemen, 1967-1987 p.25". These should be merged.
There's an error message for the "Reuters (23 May 1990)." ref that needs to be resolved
All websites should have access dates.
Suggest archiving the websites using IA Bot.

DoneAbo Yemen ✉ 10:41, 1 June 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Hope this helps. Z1720 (talk) 02:45, 31 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from CMD

The lead is mostly history, it should be a summary of the whole article. It is missing coverage of four sections and mentions of all included subsections. If needed, condense and combine the two history paragraphs.
Some copyediting is needed in the History section, difficult to make specific suggestions without access to the sources but this may come up in a GAN. The comparisons with Germany and Korea are odd as the histories involved seem different.
The Demographics section reads as completely off-topic. If the subject is the 1967-1990 entity, stats from 2000 do not seem too helpful. The History section mentions some demographics in Aden, what happened to those people? Is there any information about education systems, health systems, age and gender distributions? Move living standards up from Politics perhaps.
Politics has a bit more information but still shows a lot of gaps, and a lot of unsourced current text. One of the most obvious gaps is the civil war, the politics section should cover political differences such as the tensions were that led up to the war.
Administrative divisions should cover what powers were exercised at each level of government.
A brief Geography section would likely be useful, which could include changes such as the loss of Kamaran.
Culture seems another missing section, the shift from traditional rule towards communist governance surely had some cultural impact on the population.

These are broad comments, but they indicate the areas the article can grow towards, shifting perhaps from the current focus on History and Oil to a more rounded product. Best, CMD (talk) 07:39, 5 June 2024 (UTC)[reply]