Wikipedia:Peer review/Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney/archive1

Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney

I've listed this article for peer review because… The article is really a one that someone should take pride on. However, when it was promoted to GA, some concerns were raised, e.g. that the plot section needs more citations and general prose needs to be improved. So, in that light, I am initiating this peer review for other editors to make suggestions to improve this article and potentially get it close to a Featured Article nomination.

Thanks, Abequinn14 (talk) 02:18, 3 August 2018 (UTC)

In general, plot sections do not need citations. Obviously, if it can be cited, it should, but it's not something that needs to be done. I'd request a formal copy-edit from WP:GOCE before we start. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 08:17, 3 August 2018 (UTC)

Sure. I've made a request there for now. Abequinn14 (talk) 15:03, 3 August 2018 (UTC)

• I'm the main editor of this article and brought it to GA a few years ago, and yeah, it would be really neat if we could get it to FA. I think the main issues are the reception section, which I think might need to be rewritten completely, and the gameplay section, which relies very heavily on the game's manual.--Alexandra IDV^talk 09:07, 11 August 2018 (UTC)

Well, hey there. I think GOCE will do a lot of work, but for this peer review we can

• Check sources listed in the talk page and see what we can do there (add content)
• Does this comment by an IP have to do with anything?
• I wonder what we could do with the gameplay section. At least one secondary source describe's how it is (even though the description may not be that formal).

Abequinn14 (talk) 16:08, 12 August 2018 (UTC)

FYI, GOCE is in the middle of doing edits in this article. Abequinn14 (talk) 20:21, 18 August 2018 (UTC)

Comments from ProtoDrake

In general, this article looks comprehensive and well structured. There are some small niggles that struck me reading through it.

• The Plot section's fifth paragraph has way too many commas for comfortable reading. I realise the Ace Attorney series doesn't give itself willingly to concise plots or easy summaries, but I think you could break up that first sentence a bit. This problem applies to the section's other paragraphs, but it's most noticeable in the fifth.

I did some edits to that paragraph, I'll see if there is more issues tomorrowwhen copy edits are done. Abequinn14 (talk) 00:07, 19 August 2018 (UTC)

• Try to avoid too many citations in the middle of sentences and/or without any punctuations near them.

There was a big problem with citations here, but I did some other minor citation moving. Abequinn14 (talk) 00:44, 21 August 2018 (UTC)

• Does the interview with Takumi say when the game began development, or only how long it took to develop.

The former.

It was in 2000 when Mr Mikami said I could make my own game and my original idea was a fairly typical adventure with a detective as the main character.

(1) Abequinn14 (talk) 19:15, 19 August 2018 (UTC)

• Make sure the references include links to the websites/publishers that have articles to them such as Kotaku and IGN.

Done by User:MrLinkinPark333. Abequinn14 (talk) 02:29, 21 August 2018 (UTC)

--ProtoDrake (talk) 21:17, 17 August 2018 (UTC)

All done (at least I think so) Abequinn14 (talk) 23:46, 23 August 2018 (UTC)

Comments from The1337gamer

• Retro Gamer #176 has a "Making of Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney" feature with Takumi. I don't see that cited here but if anyone wants to give it a read and maybe expand the article using it, ping me, I can post scans. --The1337gamer (talk) 19:42, 23 September 2018 (UTC)
  • @The1337gamer: I would be very interested in that.--Alexandra IDV^talk 20:16, 23 September 2018 (UTC)

@Alexandra IDV: Pages 88-91: [1]. --The1337gamer (talk) 20:30, 23 September 2018 (UTC)