Wikipedia:Peer review/Nestory Irankunda/archive1

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I have listed this article for peer review in hopes of making it a featured article in the future. Any comments on how to improve is welcome.

Thanks, JC Kotisow (talk) 06:23, 24 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]

While the lead needs rewriting, the third paragraph, "Irankunda was announced to join Bayern Munich in July 2024 for an undisclosed fee, presumably, breaking the A-League transfer record " is too short and should be merged with the fourth one.
This line, "Born in Tanzania, Irankunda has represented Australia at youth level" should go to the second paragraph. Second paragraph is the line after the infobox
Also add the Tanzania part where he was born and link them. Safari Scribe^{Edits! Talk!} 14:57, 27 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]
@SafariScribe Thanks for your comment. I have reworded the lead according to your views. JC Kotisow (talk) 01:52, 29 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]

I added this article to the FAC PR sidebar. Please consider reviewing articles on that list. Z1720 (talk) 17:37, 2 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]