Wikipedia:Peer review/Morrison Hershfield/archive1

Morrison Hershfield edit

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I would like to know if this page passes the notability standards. It is the second article I have created on my own and would like to take all necessary steps to keep this article up. I am open to all feedback and suggestions.

Thanks, Joe Fielder (talk) 19:56, 22 October 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Ruhrfisch comments: There are several references to third-party, independent reliable sources which cover the firm in a non-trivial way, so I think it meets the notability requirements. Thanks for your work on this and here are some suggestions for improvement.

  • The lead does not really follow WP:LEAD - it should be an accessible and inviting overview of the whole article, but seems not to have anything on the History, for example, nor does it even mention this is a Canadian firm. My rule of thumb is to include every header in the lead in some way
  • Nothing important should be in the lead only - since it is a summary, it should all be repeated in the body of the article itself - but the fact that it is an employee-owned company is only in the lead, and the 15 offices across North America are also only mentioned there, as far as I can tell.
  • Could years be added to the history section? When were these acquisitions? How much did they cost?
  • Notable projects are all since 1997, and Awards are all since 2005. Did the firm do nothing of note in its first 50 plus years? See WP:Recentism
  • As it currently stands, the article reads more like an advertisement or promtional piece for the firm than a neutral article. There is no criticism of the firm and no negative coverage. See WP:NPOV
  • I also note that all the images are from the firm itself and were uploaded by the main editor, which means there may be a conflict of interest here.
  • One way to avoid these last two issues is to incorporate more coverage from independent, reliable third-party sources, such as magazines, newspapers, trade journals and the like.
  • Much of the article is in bullet list form - if possible could these lists be converted to regular prose? It would flow better and be less choppy that way.
  • A model article is useful for ideas and examples to follow. BAE Systems and Elderly Instruments are FAs about businesses and may be useful model articles.
  • Article is pretty short, so there is not a lot more to say.

Hope this helps. If my comments are useful, please consider peer reviewing an article, especially one at Wikipedia:Peer review/backlog (which is how I found this article). I do not watch peer reviews, so if you have questions or comments, please contact me on my talk page. Yours, Ruhrfisch ><>°° 03:45, 29 October 2010 (UTC)[reply]