Wikipedia:Peer review/Entertainment/archive1

Entertainment edit

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I have been working on it intensively for a while and think it is ready to be assessed and considered for my first GA. I would like to know how to get it to that standard. Thanks, Whiteghost.ink (talk) 03:20, 29 November 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Great improvement. For some of the forms of entertainment, it's not clear how they meet your definition of entertainment as opposed to leisure. e.g. Games needs to be about when people play games in front of an audience (in addition to their use as leisure). Similar for childrens' play.--99of9 (talk) 21:23, 29 November 2012 (UTC)[reply]
- Good point. I have clarified how championship games have a big audience of non-players and distinguished those from games (especially ones played by children) that create their own audience as players take turns. Whiteghost.ink (talk) 07:13, 30 November 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • On a first view, I think there has been a lot of really good work done here, & it is already at GA standard, except for a lack of references. Personally I'm relaxed about this, as it is such a summary overview, with many links to referenced articles. Other points:
  • Generally the article could distinguish more between professional entertainers watched by an audience, and participatory entertainment - maybe by a separate section on the professionalization of the entertainer. This is especially an issue with the too-short dance section - surely this has been the predominant form of entertainment for most of the world through most of history, but in a participatory form. No links to either disco (at Nightclub) or folk dancing, or the rather good striptease! Some African content needed here surely. I'm not sure I entirely agree with the distinction made in the lead, by implication insisting on a distinction between the audience and performers. Most forms of entertainment have evolved from being at least partly participatory to professionalized forms, & it makes sense to take the two together.
  • In general I think more links are needed, especially to historical forms - I entirely agree with the comments on the talk page, & the links here will need regular ruthless weeding, but we have a lot of good articles and an overview article like this should take full advantage of WP's ability to link, selecting for decent articles rather than subjects we ought to have decent articles on but don't. There is a case for short and select lists (in running text) of linked examples at the end of most sections.
  • I'd like to see sections on aspects of the context of entertainment. Religious festivals as entertainment, from Holi to Holy Week processions (a pretty poor article - some local ones are better) were often a major context of entertainment historically, especially for large-scale festivities. Court entertainments were crucial for the development of most highly specialized "classical" or "art" forms of public entertainment around the world. Shows performed for people eating or drinking, from oral epic poetry through medieval court drama to modern cabaret and tourist jousting shows etc etc deserve a mention. Also street performers & buskers. Lord of misrule-type social inversion tradition occurs in various forms around the world - we don't seem to have a general article on them though. Payment for entertainment - the rise of the ticket - is worth a section.
  • The literature section needs to distinguish more sharply between oral literature (a truly crap article), essentially public entertainment, and the essentially private recreational experience of reading, with reading aloud to an audience perhaps as a transitional stage.

Johnbod (talk) 14:53, 2 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]

- Thanks. I will work through these concerns. Whiteghost.ink (talk) 07:03, 4 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]