Wikipedia:Peer review/Campbell's dwarf hamster/archive1

Campbell's dwarf hamster edit

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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I want it to become a good article and before I nominate it I want it to be peer reviewed.

Thanks, Puffin ^{Let's talk!} 11:06, 7 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Nikkimaria

File:Campbells_dwarf.jpg: where are you getting that licensing tag from? The given source seems to cite Wikipedia
- Image changed. Puffin ^{Let's talk!} 19:20, 12 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
" the breeding season for Campbell's dwarf hamster is different, depending on the location" - how about "varies by location" or similar? More concision needed
- Y revision Puffin ^{Let's talk!} 17:07, 8 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Check comma usage throughout
- Y revision Puffin ^{Let's talk!} 19:20, 12 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"Campbell's dwarf hamster marks it scent around its territory using harderian glands, skin glands located behind the ears, urine and feces for communication" - grammar. Some general copy-editing needed
- Y revision Puffin ^{Let's talk!} 17:07, 8 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"The lowest tolerated temperature from a laboratory experiment showed that Campbell's dwarf hamster can resist temperatures" - phrasing
- Y revision Puffin ^{Let's talk!} 19:20, 12 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"The tunnel...are usually" - grammar
- Y revision Puffin ^{Let's talk!} 17:07, 8 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"The diets of the three types of hamsters are different to avoid fighting over the same type of food" - which came first? That is, did they switch diets to avoid competition or do they live together because their diets were different to begin with?
- Y revision Puffin ^{Let's talk!} 19:20, 12 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"they may be found yurts" - grammar
- Y revision Puffin ^{Let's talk!} 17:07, 8 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"males are at higher risk to predators" - do you mean "from predators"?
- Y revision Puffin ^{Let's talk!} 17:07, 8 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"the breeding season begins towards the middle of April in Tuva and towards the end of April in Mongolia... in Mongolia, it begins in May" - which is correct?
- Y revision Puffin ^{Let's talk!} 19:20, 12 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"In captivity, the gestation period for Campbell's dwarf hamster is between 18–20 days and the shortest gestation period recorded for a captive female was 13 days...oher females have a gestation period of approximately five days" - which is correct?
- Y revision Puffin ^{Let's talk!} 19:20, 12 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"Females are usually sexually mature at two weeks of age...females become sexually mature at two months of age" - which is correct? Check for other inconsistencies
- Y revision Puffin ^{Let's talk!} 19:20, 12 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
"Female hamsters that live with the male hamsters after mating" - how typical is this behaviour?
- Y revision Puffin ^{Let's talk!} 19:20, 12 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
FN34: page? Nikkimaria (talk) 02:32, 8 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]
- Y revision Puffin ^{Let's talk!} 19:20, 12 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]