Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Vagrant Story
- The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.
The article was promoted 17:04, 10 June 2007.
Vagrant Story edit
Self-nomination: It is currently a Good Article. I've addressed some issues highlighted during peer review which gave automated suggestions, and citations have been included. Images have been given fair-use rationales. Formatting is addressed. All necessary cleanup following its related WikiProject Style Guide have also been addressed. I believe this article is ready for FA. — Bluerです。 なにか? 09:51, 28 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Per instructions at WP:PR, articles shouldn't be listed in both places. Please archive the peer review and change the talk page template to oldpeerreview, so GimmeBot can convert to ArticleHistory template when this nom closes. SandyGeorgia (Talk) 13:04, 28 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Support — Well-written and well-referenced. Excellent article. (Ibaranoff24 13:28, 28 May 2007 (UTC))[reply]
- Comment—needs additional copy-editing in the story, development, and reception/criticism sections. I've passed through the rest of the article, but those sections still have glitches. — Deckiller 15:22, 28 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Fixed what I see in them. Some more? — Bluerで す。 18:31, 28 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- More work is required, namely in comma usage and redundancies. — Deckiller 18:52, 28 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Cleaned up Reception, Story and Development section. If there's more, please point out and I'll clean it up. — Bluerで す。 04:56, 29 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- I did a (quick) copyedit of the Reception section. I've never played the game and went through this section rather quickly, so please fix if I've stated something incorrectly. There's more work needed; in particular, the sentence "Smith is also credited for the localization of Final Fantasy XII." really sticks out. Pagrashtak 05:23, 29 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Expanded a bit to maintain relation to the subject and removed the FFXII trivia. — Bluerで す。 06:04, 29 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Cleaned up Reception, Story and Development section. If there's more, please point out and I'll clean it up. — Bluerで す。 04:56, 29 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- More work is required, namely in comma usage and redundancies. — Deckiller 18:52, 28 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Fixed what I see in them. Some more? — Bluerで す。 18:31, 28 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]
ConditionalSupport if the article gets the copy-editing as mentioned by Deckiller. Cheers, Lanky (YELL) 16:18, 28 May 2007 (UTC) Looks good, now. Cheers, Lanky TALK 16:14, 7 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]- Comment the wikilinking is a little inconsistent. Some terms deserve to be wikilinked but are not; some terms are wikilinked only at the second instance; and some terms are wikilinked twice in the same section. While it is true wikilinking seldom causes trouble at FACs but just a comment. Besides there are not many wikilinks in the article, so it should not take long to fix the issues. I have fixed some of them for you; if you find them bad edits you may revert all of them. I may cast a proper vote after reading through the article again. Chensiyuan 06:25, 4 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Also, you may want to decide whether American or British English applies. E.g., "travelled", "armor" and "center" are used in this article. I did not correct those because I don't know which is preferred. Chensiyuan 06:46, 4 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Parliament is mentioned in the lead, and once more much later in the body. The context of who and what is Parliament is not made clear in between. Chensiyuan 06:54, 4 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Some wikilinking has been made for certain technical terms. I've also added Valendian Parliament, since that is what the game portrays it, it doesn't actually explain more about this Parliament, rather pointing out it's the government body, and that is it. The in-game citation uses AmE, but I'm not sure which English spelling does Wikipedia use, though I prefer BrE. — Bluerで す。 07:55, 4 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- I think generally if it's an article dealing with an American subject matter it's safe to use American English throughout. Where it is more ambiguous, I think as long as it is consistent (i.e. either British English throughout or American English throughout), it should be fine. Chensiyuan 19:07, 4 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- A no-brainer for gamers, but non-gamers would not know what "MP" is -- hence, it's usually better not to abbreviate without first explaining what it stands for. Remember that all WP articles are written for a broad spectrum of readers. I'm close to voting support, we just need to sort out the various minor issues. Chensiyuan 21:19, 4 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Okay I've done a run-through of the article, everything should be in US English now. Chensiyuan 21:35, 4 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- A no-brainer for gamers, but non-gamers would not know what "MP" is -- hence, it's usually better not to abbreviate without first explaining what it stands for. Remember that all WP articles are written for a broad spectrum of readers. I'm close to voting support, we just need to sort out the various minor issues. Chensiyuan 21:19, 4 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- I think generally if it's an article dealing with an American subject matter it's safe to use American English throughout. Where it is more ambiguous, I think as long as it is consistent (i.e. either British English throughout or American English throughout), it should be fine. Chensiyuan 19:07, 4 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Some wikilinking has been made for certain technical terms. I've also added Valendian Parliament, since that is what the game portrays it, it doesn't actually explain more about this Parliament, rather pointing out it's the government body, and that is it. The in-game citation uses AmE, but I'm not sure which English spelling does Wikipedia use, though I prefer BrE. — Bluerで す。 07:55, 4 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Parliament is mentioned in the lead, and once more much later in the body. The context of who and what is Parliament is not made clear in between. Chensiyuan 06:54, 4 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Also, you may want to decide whether American or British English applies. E.g., "travelled", "armor" and "center" are used in this article. I did not correct those because I don't know which is preferred. Chensiyuan 06:46, 4 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Support while the suggestions of more copyediting remain valid, my personal concerns have been met. Thank you, and good luck. Chensiyuan 06:04, 5 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Support well-writen, comprehensive, and well copy-edited article. It even has a free picture. Kariteh 14:22, 5 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Comment—why are there excessive wikilinks all of a sudden? Words like "cult", "reefs", and "manor"s are common knowledge, and should not be wikilinked...— Deckiller 15:00, 5 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Common knowledge to an American college grad, not necessarily to someone lesser. And they're not excessive either, to the point that the article is unreadable/clunky etc. Since they provide the context of the setting, links to what these particular things are would be relevant and useful. Chensiyuan 16:03, 5 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- However, overlinking is often shunned on FACs. Although we should write in plain english, we should not link every word (such as "cult" or "mountain"). — Deckiller 18:46, 5 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- As far as I can tell 10% is cited as a good guideline -- not exactly contravened here. Beyond 10%, relevance and complexity of subject matter are also considered. Don't you think it's an exaggeration that "every word" is linked in this article. Moreover a reef is quite different from a mountain. And quite frankly, although cults abound in the USA, they don't quite exist in Asia (where I'm from), insofar as labels go. Chensiyuan 20:01, 5 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- However, overlinking is often shunned on FACs. Although we should write in plain english, we should not link every word (such as "cult" or "mountain"). — Deckiller 18:46, 5 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Common knowledge to an American college grad, not necessarily to someone lesser. And they're not excessive either, to the point that the article is unreadable/clunky etc. Since they provide the context of the setting, links to what these particular things are would be relevant and useful. Chensiyuan 16:03, 5 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- I just realized, I never gave the article my Support. — Deckiller 05:23, 6 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Pleasingly well written, mostly, but still some issues. I'm keen to establish new benchmarks for writing on games topics. Let's polish it. For example:
- "unfolds the events"?
- "three-dimensional" or "3D", take your pick.
- Uncomfortable number of "they" and "their" referring to singular "player". This usage is becoming more acceptable, there are rather a lot here, so why not make it smoother grammatically by simply pluralising "players" wherever the intended meaning is preserved. Needs an audit.
- Future tense wrong: "When the player returns to a completed block puzzle room, a time-attack mode called "Evolve, or Die!!" will begin." And "when the player taps the attack button, a wireframe sphere will appear around Ashley." Needs fixing throughout.
- "these are skills that drain his hit points (HP) in exchange for increased damage versus a foe"—That's not a good way of wording it.
- "Equipments"—Not countable.
- Plot, up to the last "Connections" section, is full of useless, irritating dictionary-word links. Please remove this blue spattering; the lead and first section are skilfully linked, so why ruin it? (Oh, except for "ruined city" to "ghost town"—that's a stretch). This concerns the requirement for "professional" formatting. BTW, 10% was a maximum that floated around a few years ago, but which has disappeared. Then further on, "producer" is piped well, but "genre"? We do speak English. Go through the whole thing. Tony 12:03, 6 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- I added a few inline queries for someone familiar with the game to address. — Deckiller 16:48, 6 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
Will try to address the issues asap.The ruined city is appropriate IMHO since the seeting is an abandoned city due to a natural disaster, which the ghost town article has addressed. I could be wrong though. — Bluerで す。 02:30, 7 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]- I have addressed the queries. My thanks to all editors who have made substantial amount of fixing and tweaking. — Bluerで す。 16:39, 7 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Support, comprehensive and comprehensible. Manderiko 16:53, 6 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.