Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/USS Johnston (DD-557)/archive1
- The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.
The article was archived by Ian Rose via FACBot (talk) 8 July 2022 [1].
- Nominator(s): –♠Vami_IV†♠ 15:27, 2 July 2022 (UTC)
It is finally my great pleasure to submit to FAC the fightin'est ship the US Navy ever saw. This article is about the destroyer Johnston, famed for its two-hour brawl with basically the whole Japanese surface fleet in October 1944. If it is not the most famous destroyer to ever sailed, or even the most famous US destroyer, then it is certainly the most famous the 175 Fletcher-class destroyers. Speaking of, I hope this to be the first of a long, long line of submissions to FAC. –♠Vami_IV†♠ 15:27, 2 July 2022 (UTC)
- Courtesy link to MILHIST A-class review. –♠Vami_IV†♠ 15:27, 2 July 2022 (UTC)
Image review
All of the images have licenses that seem feasible, but all of the source links are currently dead. Not sure if that's a permanent problem, but if it persists in a day or two I would suggest looking at archives or updated links. Nikkimaria (talk) 03:39, 3 July 2022 (UTC)
Gog the Mild
editRecusing to review.
- Suggest running the first paragraph of the lead straight into the second.
- "the Liberation of the Philippines." I suspect that should be a lower case l. Do a majority of hte HQRSs capitalise liberation?
- A cursory search on Google Books would imply "no", so I've lower-cased "liberation" (I've changed the second instance of "Liberation of the Philippines" to a piped link, "invade the Philippines"). –♠Vami_IV†♠ 06:18, 6 July 2022 (UTC)
- "On 25 October 1944, Johnston ... were engaged by a large Imperial Japanese Navy flotilla." Could we have an introduction to this? If only 'While doing this ...' or similar.
- Added. –♠Vami_IV†♠ 06:18, 6 July 2022 (UTC)
- "with 187 losses". By "losses", do you mean 'killed'?
- Yes; changed (and the sentence shortened by removing the mention of the Johnston' being crewed by 327 personnel.)
- "which included Evans." → 'including Evans.'
- "Johnston was laid down in May 1942 and was launched a little more than a year later." The article states "Her launch ... took place on 25 March 1943." This is not "a little more than a year later."
- Replaced "a little more year later" with the exact date of launching. –♠Vami_IV†♠ 06:18, 6 July 2022 (UTC)
- "Design and characteristics" section: I think that it would be helpful to introduce this section with something like 'USS Johnston was a Fletcher-class destroyer built for the US Navy.'
- Somewhere in the article could what "DD-557" means be explained.
- "The Fletcher-class destroyers were designed, beginning in October 1939, to be large enough to". This is an odd construction, usually dates are at the start of a sentence. 'Beginning in October 1939, the Fletcher-class destroyers were designed to be large enough to' reads more felicitously to my eye.
- I have cut out the date. –♠Vami_IV†♠ 06:18, 6 July 2022 (UTC)
- "to be large enough to adequately carry the armament of the preceding Gleaves-class destroyers." Does this mean that the Gleaves-class destroyers were not large enough to adequately carry their armament? Is any further information on the Fletchers' design specification or requirements known?
- Link "standard load" and "full load".
- "and 0.5 inches (13 mm) on the deck over its machinery". Was the rest of the deck armoured? If not, is in known what it was made of?
- "five dual-purpose 5 in (127 mm)/38 cal. guns". Were they in single mounts? Where on the vessel were they positioned?
- "Mark 37 Gun Fire Control System"; "Mark 27 Torpedo Fire Control System"; "Mark 27 Depth Charge Fire Control System"; "Mark 51 Fire Control System". Why all the upper case initial letters?
- I forget; reduced now. –♠Vami_IV†♠ 06:27, 6 July 2022 (UTC)
- "at the Seattle-Tacoma Shipbuilding Corporation's yard". Is it known where this was located?
- "fitted out into early November." Should "into" be 'in'?
I am going to pause here. Vami_IV, this is looking distinctly under-prepared for FAC. While some of the above is minor, some is not, and there are a lot of issues given that I have not yet got into the meat of the article. I am thinking that withdrawal, a visit to PA and possibly GoCE prior to a renomination may be the way to go. Or are you quite confident that things will improve once I move into service history? Thoughts? Gog the Mild (talk) 16:06, 5 July 2022 (UTC)
- No. I will act on these comments and withdraw the nomination. Feel free to make further comments on the talk page; we only stand to gain from them. –♠Vami_IV†♠ 05:34, 6 July 2022 (UTC)
Source review
edit- A revised edition of Friedman was published last year
- Conway's is an anthology with chapters by different authors
- Revised reference (removed Gardiner, credited Friedman). –♠Vami_IV†♠ 06:47, 6 July 2022 (UTC)
- Rohwer is the 3rd edition and needs the full subtitle added
- Oops. Revised. –♠Vami_IV†♠ 06:47, 6 July 2022 (UTC)
- The DANFS entry needs a date
- Added. –♠Vami_IV†♠ 06:47, 6 July 2022 (UTC)
- While I appreciate your use of Hornfischer and McComb, I'm afraid that I cannot regard Morison and Roscoe as highly reliable sources due to their age and lack of access to Japanese sources
- I'd strongly suggest cross-referencing Hornfischer's account of Johnston's final action with the individual Japanese ship pages on combinedfleet.com to see exactly which ships engaged the destroyer at which time and any effects their fire might have had on the ship.
- While I'm not fully up to date on recent publications on the Battle of Leyte/off Samar, I've found Milan Vego's The Battle for Leyte, 1944: Allied and Japanese Plans, Preparations, and Execution and John Prados's Storm over Leyte: The Philippine Invasion and the Destruction of the Japanese Navy helpful for my Japanese ship articles that were involved in the battles.
- Oppose--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 15:51, 5 July 2022 (UTC)
- Just to tag on, Wilmott's The Battle of Leyte Gulf: The Last Fleet Action would be a good choice to consult. Parsecboy (talk) 16:49, 5 July 2022 (UTC)
- Closing note: This candidate has been withdrawn, but there may be a delay in bot processing of the close. Please see WP:FAC/ar, and leave the {{featured article candidates}} template in place on the talk page until the bot goes through. Ian Rose (talk) 10:04, 8 July 2022 (UTC)
- The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.