Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/The Legend of Bhagat Singh/archive1

The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by Laser brain via FACBot (talk) 3 June 2019 [1].


Nominator(s):  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 08:20, 4 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

This article is about The Legend of Bhagat Singh, a 2002 biopic of the Indian freedom fighter Bhagat Singh. The film stars Ajay Devgn as the titular character and is known for its direction, story, screenplay, technical aspects and the performances of the cast members. A special note of thanks to Numerounovedant for reviewing the GAN. This is my sixth FAC attempt and my second solo nomination. Constructive comments here are most welcome.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 08:20, 4 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Support from Damian Vo

edit
Thank you very much, Damian Vo. Your thoughts and comments are greatly appreciated.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 10:58, 4 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Support Comments from Tim riley

edit

The nominator has asked me to comment, which I am happy to do. Please bear in mind that as a BrE writer I am not familiar with differences in usage in Indian English. The two may differ in ways I don’t know about.

  • Plot
  • The text switches between past and present tenses in places, for example:
"When Lala Lajpat Rai was beaten to death ... Thapar and Chandra Shekhar Azad, carry out the assassination" – [is beaten?]
"the British proposed the Trade Disputes and Public Safety Bills, Bhagat... initiates the bombing" – [propose?]
"The Indians hope that Gandhi would..." – [will?]
  • "Bhagat and other fellow prisoners, including Thapar and Rajguru, undertake a 63-day fast unto death" – plainly not "unto death" in his case, at least.
  • "Irwin": his name is in the link to the pact, but he should, I think, be linked at first mention of his name in its own right.
  • Development
  • "Although Manoj Kumar made an earlier film in 1965, titled Shaheed" – we don't need to be told that 1965 was earlier than 2002.
  • Casting
  • "but he left the project due to schedule conflicts" – varieties of English differ about "due to". In AmE it is evidently accepted as a compound preposition, like "owing to"; in formal BrE it is not, and either "owing to" or (better) "because of" would be wanted. I don't know what the convention is in Indian English, and just raise the point for you to consider.
  • Music
  • The table of numbers is beautifully presented. I must have a look at the edit page and see how it's done.
  • Reception and accolades
  • "Devgn's execution of Bhagat" – in the circumstances I think you could find a synonym for "execution" here.
  • "more "restrained and credible" than Deol" – careful readers will be clear that this Deol is Bobby and not Sunny, but for casual readers it might be a kindness to give this Deol both his names here.
  • "Kehr eulogised Devgn's interpretation" – "eulogised" seems a bit strong unless the critic really went over the top in his praise.
  • References
  • On the face of it, to my inexpert eye, the sources are proper media ones – not relying on blogs or other sites that don't qualify as WP:RS.

The article is readable, well-proportioned, properly referenced, and thorough without going into excessive detail. The mixed reviews are given due coverage. I look forward to supporting the promotion of this article once these minor points are addressed. I'll look in again soon. – Tim riley talk 06:58, 5 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you very much for your review, Tim riley (Some solid points there). I've resolved your comments. Do have a look at the article and let me know if there's anything. Thanks.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 07:18, 5 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
All nicely attended to. I'm happy to support. Tim riley talk 09:09, 5 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you very much, Tim riley. Your thoughts and comments are greatly appreciated.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 09:18, 5 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Veera Narayana

edit
  • "...until the day he was hanged" -- "...hanged to death" might be a better choice.
  • "Produced by Kumar and Ramesh Taurani under their Tips Industries Limited banner..." -- Could be rephrased as "Produced by Kumar and Ramesh Taurani's Tips Industries Limited...".
  • "the film's story and dialogue were written Santoshi and Piyush Mishra wrote respectively" -- "the film's story and dialogue were written by Santoshi and Piyush Mishra respectively" should be fine.
  • "Later in 1929, when the British propose the Trade Disputes and Public Safety Bills, Bhagat, along with Batukeshwar Dutt, initiates the bombing at Parliament House." -- Why did they initiate the bombings? What was the specific threat that accompanied the bills? If the film speaks about it clearly, please mention it.
  • What was Lord Irwin's role in the film exactly? Mention it in the plot.
  • "Bhagat, Thapar and Rajguru are hanged in secrecy at 7:33 pm on 23 March 1931." -- "hanged to death" might be a better choice. BTW, is the time that important in the larger scheme of things?
  • "Sunil Grover as a Jaidev Kapoor": "as a" --> "as"
  • "Anjum Rajabali mentioned to Santoshi about his work on Har Dayal, whose revolutionary activities inspired Udham Singh." -- Who is Udham Singh?
  • Feel free to disagree, but, what is the specific need to the quote of Devgn which is doing nothing but glorifying the subject matter? The Development section already said that the film is about the man more than the revolutionary. Hence, it would present something the public domain was unaware of. Will Devgn taking aback after listening to the script for this very reason qualify the need for a quote like that?
  • "Sushant Singh and D. Santosh, who made his cinematic debut, were cast as Bhagat's friends" -- Could be rephrased to "Sushant Singh and D. Santosh (in his cinematic debut) were cast as Bhagat's friends".
  • "The soundtrack was released on 4 May 2002 in New Delhi under the label of Tips." -- I think it is better to say that Tips marketed the soundtrack.
  • "...criticising the inclusion of Mannewali as Bhagat's widow..." -- widow? He married her? No such instance was found in the plot summary though.

Well, for the images and sources, we do have specific and separate reviewers. Hence i am staying away from those aspects. On a concluding note, this article seems to be comprehensive and well-researched enough to be a FA Candidate. Let me know once the comments above are addressed. Regards, Veera Narayana 11:17, 5 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

I've resolved your comments as best as I can, Veera. Do let me know if there's anything else. Thanks.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 12:14, 5 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks for the quick response. Well, Ssven2, what is your view/understanding on Devgn's quote and its inclusion into the article? Veera Narayana 14:05, 5 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Veera Narayana, he's basically talking about how much playing the freedom fighter on-screen means to him. Also, those who watch the film would get a better understanding of the freedom fighter and that Bhagat Singh was more than just 23 March 1931. So, I feel it can be included in the article for the readers to get what it means to Devgn (He also won the National Award for it btw).  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 14:13, 5 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
I have nothing much to say further. This candidate has my support. Veera Narayana 14:33, 5 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you very much, Veera Narayana. Your thoughts and comments are greatly appreciated.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 14:36, 5 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

I've made a couple of minor tweaks to punctuation and a couple of minor additions. Please let me know if you'd like to know the rationale behind any of them.

Development
  • "Later in August 2000": Either "Later" or (much better) "In August 2000". (As it's two years after the previous date, it's obviously "later").
  • Rajkumar Santoshi and Anjum Rajabali. I think you need to introduce the two a little better: "the film director Rajkumar Santoshi" and "the screenwriter Anjum Rajabali" would just help the reader here
  • "Santoshi gave Rajabali a copy of K. K. Khullar's biography of the revolutionary titled Shaheed Bhagat Singh." You can tweak this to flow a little better: "Santoshi gave Rajabali a copy of Shaheed Bhagat Singh: K. K. Khullar's biography of the revolutionary". (your call – it's not an actionable one if you don't want to)
  • "Martyr : Bhagat" You can lose the space before the colon
  • "began his research on Bhagat Singh": we don't need the full name again
  • "was "a difficult task" for him.": the last two words are not needed
  • "received inputs from Kultar Singh": input singular
  • You need to check throughout for WP:LQ punctuation. For the quote ending 'fighter." ', it's not a full sentence, so it should be 'fighter". ' with the full stop outside. (ditto 'in that period."' In the final para of the section, plus a few other places).
  • "by it and agreed to produce the film under their banner and commence filming". The "and ...and ..." nature of this makes it feel a bit of a run on. Full stop after "impressed by it" and redraft the next sentence would work well enough.
Casting
  • "that point.[5] he had not watched" – Capital H
Additional
  • Is there any indication how the film has fared since its release? (Did/does it do well in the DVD market, for example, or was there a '10-year retrospective' or similar, which looks at the impact or legacy of the film? Cheers – SchroCat (talk) 10:32, 6 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
All done except for the final comment, SchroCat. I've asked for your opinion about it on your talk page. Cheers.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 14:17, 6 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
If those are all reliable sources, then I think you should include a paragraph covering their content. How the film compares with similar works or stands the test of time should be covered wherever possible, I think (particularly for an FA). Cheers - SchroCat (talk) 07:27, 7 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Included a paragraph as per your suggestions, SchroCat. Do let me know if there's anything else. Cheers.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 09:48, 7 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you very much, SchroCat. Your thoughts and comments are greatly appreciated.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 10:40, 7 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Aoba47

edit
  • I would add ALT text to the infobox image. I would check to make sure that all of the images used in the article have appropriate ALT text.
  • Would a wikilink for “hunger strike” be helpful?
  • For this part (burning British-made clothing, giving up school, college studies, and government jobs.), shouldn’t it be “burning British-made clothing and giving up…)? The entirety of the phrase “school, college studies, and government job” is tied up to the “giving up” part and by having another comma, it makes me think that there is a third item in this list of actions which is not the case.

The article looks great. You definitely inspire me to work on more film articles. If possible, I would greatly appreciate any comments on my current FAC. Once my three (very minor) comments are addressed, I will be more than happy to support this. Aoba47 (talk) 18:24, 6 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for the comments, Aoba47. I've resolved them as per your suggestions. Do let me know if there's anything else. Cheers.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 09:44, 7 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you very much, Aoba47. Your thoughts and comments are greatly appreciated.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 16:46, 7 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Kailash

edit
  • I think "biopic" is informal, so write the full form. I'm sure you can find other ways to reduce the "film" count in the lead.
  • In the lead, all major Filmfare nominations (directing, producing, writing and acting) must be mentioned. But you have simply mentioned that the film won "three Filmfare Awards" with no nominations. Or just consider writing "X Filmfare Awards from X nominations".
  • Replace "publisher" with "website".
  • Santoshi gave Rajabali a copy of Shaheed Bhagat Singh: K. K. Khullar's biography of the revolutionary - I would suggest a comma instead of a colon.
  • Chandrashekhar Azad – the article is Chandra Shekhar Azad.
  • it was declared a "disaster" by Box Office India - BOI verdicts are not supposed to be included per this disccussion and this too. Kailash29792 (talk) 07:01, 7 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you for the comments, Kailash29792. I've resolved them as per your suggestions. Do let me know if there's anything else. Cheers.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 09:47, 7 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Nothing else from me, just verify that the cast members are all sourced (using BH and the credits). Nonetheless, this already has my support. --Kailash29792 (talk) 10:12, 7 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you very much, Kailash29792. Your thoughts and comments are greatly appreciated.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 10:17, 7 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Cass

edit

Marking my place here, whilst reading through and taking notes. As with Tim and SchroCat, I'm English so my way of phrasing things may differ somewhat to others. Comments to follow...

Lede
  • "The Legend of Bhagat Singh is a 2002 Indian historical biographical film directed by Rajkumar Santoshi." The year jars where it is. Would suggest: "The Legend of Bhagat Singh is an Indian historical biographical film directed by Rajkumar Santoshi and released in 2002."
  • "The Legend of Bhagat Singh was released on 7 June 2002 to generally positive critical reviews" -- what is "critical" adding here?
Plot
  • "Later in 1929..." -- later, in 1929 or later on in the year 1929? This is the first mention of 1929 as the year before it is 1907.
  • "In Central Jail Lahore, Bhagat and other fellow prisoners..." -- some fellow prisoners, all his fellow prisoners?
Development
  • "In August 2000, the screenwriter Anjum Rajabali..." -- we dip from an accepted form of AmEng (In 1998, film director Rajkumar Santoshi) into a spot of BrEng, here, with the use of the definite article. Be consistent and stick to a particular style.
Casting
  • "...to see Devgn's face closely resembled Singh's" → "to see Devgn's face closely resemble Singh's"
  • "Devgn called the film "the most challenging assignment" in his career at that point" -- You don't need "at that point".
  • "Mishra mentioned that while informing his father about his role" -- Why was Mishra having a frank discussion with his father about his paternal responsibilities? I think you mean to say "Mishra mentioned that while informing his father about his role of Azad"
  • Who said "became a driving force"? You quote it but without attribution.
  • "The actors were chosen according to their characters' backgrounds as well." → "The actors were also chosen according to their characters' backgrounds."
Filming
  • "some of them were shot between 9 pm and 6 am." -- and this is pertinent, because? I assume because it was dark.
  • "Kultar in turn was so pleased..." -- no need for the adjective here.

I will continue later. All looks good though. CassiantoTalk 18:05, 7 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you very much for your comments, Cassianto. I've resolved them. Do let me know if there's anything else. Thanks.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 05:25, 8 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you very much, Cassianto. Your thoughts and comments are greatly appreciated.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 06:56, 12 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Dwaipayan

edit
  • Any reason why Bhagath Singh is referred to as Bhagath instead of Singh in the article?
This is done to avoid confusion with the surname "Singh" as there are many characters and actors (Sushant Singh) with that particular surname. So I've referred to those people by their first names.
Ok.
  • "Many aspects of Bhagat's life, including Mannewali, were derived from Piyush Mishra's 1994 play Gagan Damama Bajyo..." Mannewali is probably not an "aspect" of his life. Perhaps "including his romance with/marriage with/relationship with (wife/fiancée) Mannewali" is better.
Done. As asked.
I finetuned it in the article :) You are taking suggestions too literally!
Thanks for that.
Done. As asked,
Oh, you have changed Devgn to Devgan everywhere. I did not ask for that. I am not sure whether this is appropriate. What I requested is mentioning something like "Ajay Devgn (then known as Ajay Devgan)" in cast section.--Dwaipayan (talk) 16:59, 10 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Oops, my bad. I've changed it now. Have a look and see if it is alright, Dwaipayanc.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 17:13, 10 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Image review

edit

Images are appropriately licensed. Nikkimaria (talk) 20:42, 11 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you very much, Nikkimaria. Appreciate it.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 06:57, 12 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Sources review

edit
  • No spotchecks carried out
  • All links to sources are working according to the external link checker tool
  • Formats
  • Ref 12: should "K, Kannan" read "K. Kannan", i.e full stop not comma?
@Brianboulton: The URL (link is here) says it as "Kannan K" so there's no full stop as per the source.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 07:49, 21 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • General: Sources which are not in print media should not be italicized. See for example Box Office India, Bollywood Hungama, Sify, Zee News, possibly others
Done as asked.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 07:49, 21 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • Quality and reliability: Refs 9, 21: what makes this a high quality, reliable source?
@Brianboulton: They are from the film's official website.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 07:49, 21 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Apart from the issues indicated, the sources are consistently presented and in general meet the required standards of quality and reliability per the FA criteria. Brianboulton (talk) 21:27, 20 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.