Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/The Constant/archive1

The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was not promoted by SandyGeorgia 18:38, 21 December 2011 [1].

The Constant edit

Featured article candidates/The Constant/archive1

Nominator(s): igordebraga ≠ 12:15, 29 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I am nominating this for featured article because... widely considered the best episode of Lost, the article was edited to also be along the best Lost articles on Wikipedia (after all, it has many examples to follow). Hope the FA manages to be as successful as Desmond's search on how to revert getting "unstuck in time". Thank you, namaste, and good luck. igordebraga ≠ 12:15, 29 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Comment: The link to FAC on the article's talkpage has not been completed properly. Also, in the lead I read "whether it is possible to avoid paradox in time travel is debatable." This opinion needs attribution as well as citation, 1.e. whose opinion is it? I don't see any follow-up on this issue in the main article text, either. Brianboulton (talk) 15:22, 29 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Source review - spotchecks not done. Nikkimaria (talk) 15:31, 29 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Be consistent in how citations are punctuated
What makes this a high-quality reliable source? this? this? this? this?
- Television Without Pity is owned by NBC Universal (Bravo, more specifically). The third (which descends from TV Squad) is by AOL. The second one is backed by the Los Angeles Times. The BuddyTV and Airlock Alpha ones are reviews, done by the editorial staff and don't violate the WP:RS parts that state "with the exception of material on such sites that is labeled as originating from credentialed members of the sites' editorial staff, rather than users".
Combine identical citations
- Was there another except for the Airlock Alpha one?
Don't italicize publishers.
- Done.

Nikkimaria (talk) 15:31, 29 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Noleander

In Awards section: phrase "... this was the only submission that came through.." needs to be clarified: came through what? --Noleander (talk) 19:12, 30 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]
In Lead: " ..The writers claim to have been careful not to create a temporal paradox when dealing with time travel" seems a bit out of place. Why single that one fact out for the lead? Also, the word "claim" could be replaced with a better word, claim implies that others may dispute its validity. --Noleander (talk) 19:12, 30 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]
- Fixed both. igordebraga ≠ 10:30, 3 December 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Oppose. There are many problems with this article, not least of which is that it's almost incomprehensible to a non-fan. Here are a few examples:

Lead

"It was written by executive producer Carlton Cuse and co-creator/executive producer Damon Lindelof and directed by executive producer Jack Bender in late October 2007." So it was written and directed in late October 2007?
"In the episode, Desmond Hume (played by Henry Ian Cusick) and Sayid Jarrah (Naveen Andrews) are on their way to a freighter". Why are they on their way to a freighter?
"After going through turbulence, Desmond experiences unexpected side effects". As opposed to expected side effects?
"The writers took twice the normal time to develop the episode's script, with the biggest concern being on how not to create a temporal paradox when dealing with time travel." That's pretty ugly. For instance, what about "how to avoid" rather than "how not to create"?
I don't think the lead adequately summarises the article.

Plot

"Desmond, Sayid and Frank Lapidus (Jeff Fahey) experience turbulence flying from the island in a helicopter". What island?
"Desmond flashes back to 1996 where he is serving for the British Army's Royal Scots Regiment." 1996 isn't a place, therefore "where" is incorrect. Also, you need to establish right away, here and in the lead, what the date is of this helicopter trip, presumably 2004?
"Moments later, when his mind returns to the helicopter ...". His mind was never in the helicopter, so how could it return there?
"... Desmond continues to jump between 1996 and December 2004". What's the significance of the month for 2004, but not for 1996?
"Minkowski explains that someone sabotaged the radio room a couple of days ago ...". Presumably that should be "a couple of days earlier"?
"Sayid uses the satellite phone to contact Jack Shephard (Matthew Fox) on the beach". What beach?
"Desmond responds that he believes that he is in 1996 and is serving for the Royal Scots". Should be "serving with".
"Daniel Faraday (Jeremy Davies), a physicist from the freighter ...". Is Faraday on the freighter? If so, why is he being described as "from" the freighter? If he isn't, then where is Desmond at this point?
"Faraday understands and tells Desmond that he needs to take a train to the physics department of The Queen's College, Oxford University in England to find Daniel the next time that he flashes back to 1996". The next time that who flashes back? Faraday or Desmond? What's the significance of the train? Why not take a bus, or a taxi?
"... he tells Desmond that he must remember to tell Faraday, back in 1996, to set his electromagnetic device with the numbers 2.342 oscillating at 11 hertz". How can numbers oscillate?
"... he had just built the maze and had not yet taught Eloise how to navigate through it". As opposed to navigate across it or under it?
"Desmond finds her father Charles (Alan Dale) at an auction buying a journal owned by Tovard Hanso written by a crew member of the 19th century ship called the Black Rock. Widmore gives Desmond Penny's address." It's rather confusing to call the same person Charles in one sentence and then Widmore immediately afterwards.
"... they reconcile before the power cuts off". Power doesn't cut off, it is cut off.

Production

In the "Desmond in 1996 and 204" image, which is which?

Malleus Fatuorum 03:46, 18 December 2011 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.