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Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/John Early (educator)/archive1

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by Gog the Mild via FACBot (talk) 7 December 2020 [1].

John Early (educator) edit

Nominator(s): Ergo Sum 03:47, 27 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

This article is about a man who was instrumental in the early years of 3 Jesuit colleges in the United States, one of which he founded. It is currently a GA. Thank you in advance for any feedback. Ergo Sum 03:47, 27 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Comments Support from Hog Farm edit

Placeholder for future comments. This one hasn't gotten any attention, so I'll give it a look later. Might claim WikiCup points for this. Hog Farm Bacon 21:12, 10 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Lead
  • "because he was unable to gain admission to the seminary in his home country" - There was only one seminary in Ireland? Maybe I'm understanding this wrong.
  • "In 1870, he once again became president of Georgetown University, where the university's first student newspaper, the Georgetown College Journal began publishing" - Commas ain't my strong suit, but my gut tells me there should be one after Journal
Education in the United States
  • "where he remained until August, 23, 1834," - No comma after August
College of the Holy Cross
  • Orestes Brownson's name is misspelled
Layout
  • I get the topical arrangement, but with biographies, it seems that it makes more sense to present the biography chronologically. I'll concede on this, though, if others like the current arrangement.
    • My rationale for going with a topical ordering is that some of the sections aren't that long and his double presidencies at the same institutions were somewhat interrelated, which makes keeping them together convenient. However, this isn't a terribly important point for me. Ergo Sum 02:12, 14 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]
      • On second thought, I think a chronological order makes better sense. I've rearranged the article accordingly. Ergo Sum 04:20, 14 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Loyola College in Maryland
  • "The Loyola Dramatic Association, which was founded in 1865, and was especially active during his term" - Something if off here
Georgetown
  • "The college was occupied for a third time on August 29, as a hospital for the soldiers of General John Pope's army wounded at the Second Battle of Bull Run" - As a Civil War buff, I have two complaints here. One, Pope was officially ranked as a Major General, which is a separate rank than General (United States), which is almost implied from the current phrasing. Second, the chronology makes it sound like this was in 1861, but Second Bull Run was fought in 1862.
    • Good catch. Fixed Pope's rank and the year. Ergo Sum 02:05, 14 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "On May 22, 1873, Early suffered a stroke,[3] which left him unable to speak and half his body paralyzed. Two days later, he died" - Two days later would be May 24. Both the lead and the infobox say he died on May 23.

That's it from me, I believe. Good work here. Hog Farm Bacon 02:00, 11 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you, Hog Farm, for your helpful feedback. Ergo Sum 02:12, 14 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Happy to support. Good work. Hog Farm Bacon 04:27, 14 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Coord notes edit

I've placed this on the Urgents list in hope of getting more feedback. We're approaching a month on the list with relatively little attention. --Laser brain (talk) 15:30, 23 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

It is now seven weeks since this was nominated, and while I am pleased to see it pick up a couple of additional supports it still needs source and image reviews. I have listed it at requests on the FAC talk page, but if you are aware of editors who might be obliging I suggest that you contact them. Gog the Mild (talk) 12:39, 15 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Mike Christie edit

I've copy-edited a little; please revert anything you don't like.

  • His administration encompassed the Civil War, and despite intermittent occupation by the Union Army and dwindling enrollment, instruction endured uninterrupted. The intention here is "The time he was administrator included the period of the Civil War". The current wording sounds odd to me, as if the Civil War were a component of his administration. How about "During the Civil War, instruction continued uninterrupted, despite intermittent occupation by the Union Army and dwindling enrollment."? If you also cut "then" from the next sentence: "Early returned to Loyola College in 1866 ..." there is no need to explicitly say that his administration spanned the war.
    • Makes sense. I've used your phrasing. Ergo Sum 17:21, 26 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • I'm seeing a harv error on Dodd (1909); it doesn't appear to be used in the citations. Is this deliberate? Should it be in a separate "Further reading" section, or removed completed?
    • That was a vestige of when it was once used. It's no longer necessary, so I've removed it. Ergo Sum 17:23, 26 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • You're inconsistent about using locations on books; this is a minor point but it's nice to be consistent if possible. Mendizàbal (1972) and Ryan (1903) have no location given; the other book sources do.
    • I've improved the Mendizàbal ref. The location of publication is unknown for the Ryan ref. Ergo Sum 17:27, 26 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

These are all minor points. The article is cleanly written and I expect to support once these nitpicks are dealt with. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 11:57, 26 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for your feedback, Mike Christie. Ergo Sum 17:28, 26 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Support. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 01:29, 27 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

CommentsSupport from Aza24 edit

  • Loyola College in Maryland and Seminary are linked twice in the lead
  • Would link charter
  • I think the lead is well written, but based on the size of the article as a whole, it seems rather long. Some lines I'm not sure are necessary:
    • "because he was unable to gain admission to his desired seminary in his home country" – a pretty specific detail and explained in a rather elongated fashion, I would recommend deleting entirely and just combining ("Born in Ireland, he emigrated to the United States at the age of nineteen where he enrolled in..."
    • "which was intended to educate the lay former students who attended St. Mary's Seminary and College, which the Sulpicians sought to keep only as a seminary" – how about just "intended to educate former lay students of St. Mary's Seminary and College" ? (would also link lay here, otherwise it might sound like it's referring to lay as in expert vs lay person)
      • I've rephrased it slightly. I think it's important to explain why the lay students needed a new school. Ergo Sum 18:55, 6 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
    • "where the university's first student newspaper, the Georgetown College Journal," this journal only has one mention in the actual article text, is it really significant enough John Early himself to warrant inclusion in the lead?
  • Happy to discuss any of the above further – I don't want you to think I'm trying to ruin the lead – just some ideas
  • I'm not sure the lead makes it clear that he was the first president of "Loyola College in Maryland" – it just says he "established it" and "oversaw the early years"
  • consider changing the second "studied" to something like "attended" so their aren't two "studied" in one sentence
  • "but there were no vacancies, and he was not admitted" seems redundant
    • I'm not sure I agree. Without the second clause, the sentence is left hanging without actually saying why that affected Early. Without the first part, it doesn't explain why he wasn't admitted. Ergo Sum 18:17, 6 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • I suspect the sources may not specify but is it known what kind of philosophy he studied/taught?
    • Unfortunately, they don't. Given the time period, I doubt his studies were confined to any particular field of philosophy anyway. Ergo Sum 18:20, 6 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "He spent 1847 ministering" this makes it sound like he was only ministering in 1847, do you mean "he began ministering in 1847..."?
  • "On August 29, 1848" is rather choppy consider the last sentence of the previous section (On September 8, 1853) also begins with "On date,..." – I would rephrase one of these
  • commonwealth as in Commonwealth (U.S. state)?
  • Maybe "Early then returned to Frederick Maryland for a year" to make Frederick Maryland not sound like a new place for him
  • I'm confused by "and construction of the new church began in August 1855" – a new church to replace the St. Ignatius Church, a sister church of that church or...? And what does this have to do with Early? If this church being built is St. Ignatius Church itself, they sound like two different things≥
  • link commandeered to Commandeering, you may want to link "intermittent occupation" in the lead to it as well
  • "that students completed their course of study and received degrees" – do you mean "student who complete their course of study recieved degrees"? Otherwise it doesn't make sense – did the pause in the conferral of degrees also result in a pause on students who completed their courses
    • I've rephrased the first clause of the sentence. It's supposed to communicate that after an interruption, he made sure the course of study went to completion and that as a result degrees were conferred again. I'm sure the latter half is grammatically correct, and I think with the rephrase, the sentence is clearer now. Ergo Sum 18:44, 6 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • I'm not sure if Bernard A. Maguire's full name is needed after the first mention, same with Anthony F. Ciampi
  • Not sure about this one but maybe specify who the pope was at the time?
    • I don't really think that's relevant, since the point was that they perceived it to be an insult to the office, rather than to the particular incumbent pope. Ergo Sum 18:50, 6 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "In 1871, the student body once again raised a sum of money to aid the victims of the Great Chicago Fire.[36]" not sure how this relates to Early
  • that's all I got Aza24 (talk) 04:29, 4 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
    • Thank you for your thorough comments, Aza24. Ergo Sum 18:56, 6 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
      • Ergo Sum, thanks for your attentiveness here, the only issue I still have is the line: "At the same time as the college's founding, St. Ignatius Church was founded next door. Early became its first pastor, and construction of the new church began in August 1855. It was consecrated on August 15, 1856." – This sounds like Early became the pastor of a church before the church itself was even built, is this really the case? Aza24 (talk) 01:12, 7 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
        • Apologies, I see I forgot to respond to that bullet point. Yes, he became the pastor of the church before the church had its own dedicated building. I've rephrased the sentence to make this clearer. Ergo Sum 02:26, 7 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
          • No worries and thanks, it makes much more sense now. Happy to support this nomination. Aza24 (talk) 08:28, 7 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Image review - pass edit

I don't think the licensing of File:John Early cropped.jpg is appropriate. Ulke's death date seems to be known [2], which rules out point #2, it's not anonymous or psuedonymous and there's no proof it was created for hire, so #3 is ruled out, and the whole thing is predicated on unpublished before 2003, but the archived source link includes the text "Georgetown Magazine: September, 1977" under the title, which suggests to me it was published in that magazine in 1977. So I don't think the licensing for that one image is appropriate. Hog Farm Bacon 14:54, 15 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@Hog Farm:, I've added a correct license tag, which indicates the image should be in the public domain. Ergo Sum 19:31, 15 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
The new tag looks alright to me. Image licensing isn't quite my strong suit, but this instance looks straightforward enough I feel comfortable assessing it. Hog Farm Bacon 22:40, 15 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Source review edit

The article cites 9 major sources, and two websites that are just used to back up minor facts. All seem like reliable sources (though I can claim no expertise in this field).

Spot-checking sources for accuracy. I asked Random.org to give me 8 numbers between 1 and 39 (the number of citations):

  • [9](a)(b) - Both check out.
  • [11] - Checks out.
  • [15](a)(b) - Both check out.
  • [23](a)(b)(c) - All check out.
  • [28](a)(b) - Both check out.
  • [33] - The sentence is mostly cited to [32] (same book a few pages later). Not sure [33] is necessary here, but it's ok.
  • [36] - Checks out.
  • [37] - Checks out.

The sources I checked are accurately represented in the article, and there's no hint of plagiarism or copyright violation. Ajpolino (talk) 07:15, 26 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Hi Ajpolino, I was wondering if you had reviewed the formatting of the referencing, and if so, if you were happy with it. Not a problem if you haven't, so long as I know. Thanks. Gog the Mild (talk) 19:30, 1 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Oops, sorry, I tend not to have a very good eye for reference formatting so I did not. I meant to explicitly state that in the above, but clearly forgot. If someone with a more experienced eye wouldn't mind taking a look (there are just 11 sources; hopefully won't take too long!), I'd be much obliged. Thanks for checking in. Ajpolino (talk) 19:56, 1 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
@Ajpolino and Gog the Mild: - Y'all okay with me doing a formatting check? Hog Farm Bacon 18:19, 4 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Fine by me. Ergo Sum 17:43, 4 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Please! Ajpolino (talk) 21:49, 4 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Okay, so I'll give formatting a look.

  • I have a question about the Catalogus Defunctorum. I don't think the "NUMERICAL RANGE 3.287 THROUGH 5.26" is part of the title; rather it appears to be the chapter. The proper title is "Catalogus defunctorum in renata Societate Iesu ab a. 1814 ad a. 1970" I think per Worldcat, it also has an OCLC. There appear to be other Catalogus Defunctorum covering other years, so it's probably best to use the full title, set the numerical range bit up as the chapter parameter, and add the OCLC number of 884102.
    • Good catch. I've fixed the ref. Ergo Sum 00:18, 6 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • the Report of the Commissioner of Education for 1873 seems have an OCLC too, per worldcat. Please add it.
  • the OCLC for the Catholic Church of America source is here.
  • Is there a reason why the Ryan source is in sentence case, while the other references are in title case?
    • I just copied the format on Internet Archive, but I see the title page of the actual book uses title case, so I've corrected it. Ergo Sum 00:23, 6 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

That's it on the formatting, I think. Hog Farm Bacon 05:14, 5 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you, Hog Farm. Ergo Sum 00:23, 6 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
This passes the formatting check. Hog Farm Bacon 06:07, 7 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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