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Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/From The Doctor to my son Thomas/archive1

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by Graham Beards via FACBot (talk) 15:15, 23 November 2015 [1].

From The Doctor to my son Thomas edit

Nominator(s): — Cirt (talk) 01:08, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

"From The Doctor to my son Thomas" is a heartwarming video sent from actor Peter Capaldi in-character in his role as the Doctor on Doctor Who, to console an autistic young boy over grief from the death of his grandmother.

Demiurge1000 and Sasata pitched in with some useful copy-edits. Miyagawa reviewed the article and it was successfully promoted to WP:GA quality. The article was helpfully looked over at WP:DYK by Curly Turkey, G S Palmer, Cwmhiraeth, and Panyd. I'm grateful to all for the assistance helping further along the Quality improvement process.

I appreciate your time and consideration, — Cirt (talk) 01:08, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Notified: Wikipedia talk:WikiProject Television, Wikipedia talk:WikiProject Sociology, Wikipedia talk:WikiProject Scotland, Wikipedia talk:WikiProject Science Fiction, Wikipedia talk:WikiProject Media, Wikipedia talk:WikiProject Internet culture, Wikipedia talk:WikiProject Internet, Wikipedia talk:WikiProject Film, Wikipedia talk:WikiProject England, Wikipedia talk:WikiProject Doctor Who, Wikipedia talk:WikiProject Death, Wikipedia talk:WikiProject Autism, User talk:Cirt, Talk:From The Doctor to my son Thomas. — Cirt (talk) 01:08, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Johnbod edit

Good point, Johnbod, could you help me copy-edit and make some tweaks? — Cirt (talk) 02:30, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Johnbod, I've gone through and copy-edited out to switch to British English as best I could, please let me know if I've missed anything. Thanks again for picking up on that ! — Cirt (talk) 03:52, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Done. I'm quite grateful to Johnbod for the helpful copy-edits. Thank you, — Cirt (talk) 16:19, 21 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Indopug edit

  • Comments surely the title of 42-second video should be in quotes, not italics? From MOS:ITAL, "Use italics for the titles of works of literature and art, such as books, pamphlets, films (including short films), television series, named exhibitions, computer and video games (but not other software), music albums, and paintings. The titles of articles, chapters, songs, television episodes, research papers and other short works are not italicized; they are enclosed in double quotation marks".—indopug (talk) 02:38, 21 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Done. Changed to quotes. Removed italics. Thank you, Indopug, that's a helpful suggestion. — Cirt (talk) 02:46, 21 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Comments Support from John edit

Comments from John (addressed)

I made some minor adjustments of language, mostly per WP:SAID and to make it more British in style (we don't say "gotten" any more over here, for example).

I don't think we can use the Daily Mail, the Daily Mirror or the Daily Record as sources on a BLP, per WP:BLPSOURCES. --John (talk) 22:13, 27 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Removed those three (3) sources. Thank you, John, for the helpful copy-edits. Much appreciated, — Cirt (talk) 22:30, 27 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Much better, thank you. I switched out "deceased" which I often find a bit too euphemistic. I would still like one further read over before I support. --John (talk) 23:07, 27 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
You're most welcome, John, thank you for the further copy-edits. Looking forward to it, — Cirt (talk) 23:13, 27 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
I made some further edits. --John (talk) 23:54, 27 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
They all look great, John, I've been following it and I thank you for the additional passes of copy-editing, much appreciated ! — Cirt (talk) 00:07, 28 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • I now Support. --John (talk) 23:52, 29 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]
    • Thanks for the multiple passes of Copy Editing, and the Support -- much appreciated, — Cirt (talk) 00:02, 30 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Comments Support from Freikorp edit

Comments from Freikorp (addressed)

Well done on creating and writing this article. As a person with high-functioning autism I found it particularly heart-warming. Freikorp (talk) 13:57, 3 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

  • "MTV called Capaldi a most wonderful person for his act.[16] MTV concluded that the video was quite endearing.[16]" – can't you merge this into a single sentence? Especially since both sentences use the same source.
  • "The Hollywood Reporter noted that the Time Lord character..." – not being at all familiar with Doctor Who, I had to click on the link to discover what a Time Lord was and confirm that The Doctor is "the" Time Lord being referred to. Obviously cleared up once clicking on the link, but a bit confusing just from reading the prose. Just thought you should know.
  • "Metro commented that the video increased Capaldi's cool factor among his fans" – "cool factor" seems a bit colloquial, perhaps consider a direct quote from the source instead, but up to you.
  • Are you sure you can't expand the 'impact' section? Have any other autism or mental health sources commented on it? I ask as the fourth paragraph of the lead, comprised purely from information in the 'impact' section, is noticeably shorter than the others, which make it look a bit neglected by comparison. While i'm on the subject, on what basis have you decided to separate 'reception' from 'impact'? I mean, the impact section seems to me to just be the reception of Autism Daily Newscast (which appears to be just another news website like all the ones mentioned in the reception section, albeit this one is dedicated to autism) and Peter Harness. Not asking you to change it right away, just a little confused about it.
  • As it does not have a wikilink, perhaps clarify exactly what Autism Daily Newscast is.
  • I'd specify the month of the interview in the sentence "In a 2015 interview with Radio Times".

Freikorp (talk) 13:57, 3 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Reply to comments from Freikorp

Thank you, Freikorp, for these helpful recommendations. I've implemented changes in response to all of above, as I think they were all quite useful ideas:

  1. Done. Merged this into a single sentence.
  2. Done. Added info as context for the reader, in a sourced Footnotes subsection. That way, the reader won't have to leave this article for good sourced background context.
  3. Done. Added direct quote from the source instead, per above suggestion.
  4. Done. Expanded Impact section, by switching some balance from Reception section that was more directly about impact info.
  5. Done. Clarified this with a bit more sourced info.
  6. Done. Specified month of the interview in the sentence.

@Freikorp:Hopefully this addresses all of your helpful suggestions, above. Thanks again very much for your participation in this FAC, — Cirt (talk) 22:15, 3 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

You're welcome. Support now. As a final observation after looking over the article again, perhaps the infobox picture caption could be a bit more specific, rather than just the actors name, but up to you. :) Freikorp (talk) 23:21, 3 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Done. Added more specific caption to infobox. Thank you for your Support -- and your helpful suggestions. Most appreciated, — Cirt (talk) 23:29, 3 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Support on prose per standard disclaimer. These are my edits. As always, feel free to revert. I'm not very good with pop culture articles; I just dropped by to help with basic copyediting and offer a support on prose. I personally enjoyed the article. There's an argument that the article might take too long to say what it's trying to say, but that's not my call. - Dank (push to talk) 01:45, 14 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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