Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Dungeons & Dragons (album)

The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted 16:20, 5 November 2007.

Dungeons & Dragons (album) edit

I wrote this article from scratch, got it on DYK?, submitted to a peer review, got practically no response, took it to GA status and now I feel it is good enough to be a featured article. This is my first FAC, and I am ready and willing to make changes based upon the suggestions of reviewers. Thanks in advance for any comments. J Milburn 20:31, 1 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Comment "Support for Midnight Syndicate's music as a role-playing aid grew so much that the band decided to set up stalls at gaming conventions, and it was at the first one that Midnight Syndicate was approached by Wizards of the Coast and asked if they would be interested in recording an official soundtrack, which they said they would be.[8][9]" - I find this sentence a bit of a mouthful, and feel it would benefit from being split into two sentences. LuciferMorgan 20:46, 1 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Done J Milburn 20:51, 1 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

"The now defunct Living Dead Girls ezine said that music within the album was more diverse than music on Midnight Syndicate's earlier albums, allowing Dungeons & Dragons to display for the first time the musical diversity Midnight Syndicate were capable of.[24]" - Could whatever the ezine said be put in quotations, and the name of the reviewer in question given? LuciferMorgan 20:52, 1 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Done Although I do not know the name of the author, so I have referred to them as 'an unnamed writer'. J Milburn 21:06, 1 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Comments
For FA, I'd lose the red links, either create stubs or unwikify, just for aesthetics.

Done Or done some. I'll knock up some stubs for the albums later. J Milburn 16:06, 2 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Note, there's nothing wrong with redlinks, and their removal is not a requirement for FA status. On the other hand, if a term is not adequately defined in the article, then the redlink can be stubbified or a definition provided in the article. SandyGeorgia (Talk) 19:07, 30 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Douglas said that writing the album came very naturally.[8] The word "very" is not used in the source, I would remove it. Ooops, a little farther down: Douglas said that, for him, instrument choice came naturally and that "sounds and sometimes even melodies fall in line themselves".[8] So I think these two statements are a bit redundant, especially being so close in proximity to each other.

Not done It does use the word 'very'. To quote the source- "Not only were we fans of the game but Dungeons & Dragons sessions often provided inspiration for the music on some of our other discs. The writing for the D&D disc came very natural and working with the developers at Wizards of the Coast was great." The second part is in reference to instrument choice specifically- later in the interview, Douglas says that "I think instrument choice comes naturally. When you have a specific image or setting that you are writing towards, the sounds and sometimes even melodies fall in line themselves. Before I begin writing, I pick pictures and images that I feel reflect the world I'm trying to create musically and keep them near to me in the studio. I think that helps me maintain focus. For the Dungeons & Dragons disc I had the floor covered with D&D module covers and artwork." J Milburn 16:13, 2 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Good. Yes, I see it now. My bad. It was late and my eyes were crossed...:) ♫ Cricket02 16:24, 2 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Years earlier, another album, First Quest: The Music[13] was released by Filmtrax and licensed by TSR, then owners of Dungeons and Dragons,[14] for Advanced Dungeons & Dragons.[13] The flow is really broken up in this sentence with the references, and all refs need to come after a punctuation mark, i.e. #13 does not follow a punctuation mark. I think I would simply put refs 13 & 14 at the end of the sentence.

Done Although I think the comma does belong. I brutally overuse commas, but then owners of Dungeons & Dragons is meant to be in parenthesis. J Milburn 16:13, 2 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Ironically, we had an edit conflict when I was removing my statement about the comma. I agree now, it does belong. ♫ Cricket02 16:17, 2 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Midnight Syndicate typically create, according to Mario Mesquita Borges of All Music Guide, "darkly blended compositions", described both as "gloomy" and "brooding."[19 For better flow of this sentence, I think I would reverse the first two segments, i.e. According to ..., Midnight Syndicate typically create "darkly blended...

Done J Milburn 16:15, 2 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Ref #20 is "currently not available"? Otherwise, I think refs look good.

No idea. AMG hates me; it took me ages to get it to work in the first place. Could someone familiar with AMG please have a go? J Milburn 16:19, 2 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Okay, I should have used links last night instead of ref #s because the order has changed. I looked at my last edit and this is the link that is not working right now, looks like its #21 now, hauntedattraction.com. Sorry about that. It might be a temporary glitch, or maybe you can find the original in web archives. ♫ Cricket02 16:33, 2 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Done I think- does that work for everyone else? I can link myself with the new URL, when I couldn't when I just tried with the old one. AMG I still can't work out, does anyone know what the problem is? J Milburn 22:17, 2 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Haunted Attraction Magazine - example of a cited publication that should be italicized. I fixed this one but need to check for more.
Need to review throughout for un-needed commas that break up the flow.

Overuse of commas is one of the problems with my writing. Maybe someone else should check that- I'll get in contact with the league of copyeditors. J Milburn 16:22, 2 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

See also WP:MOS#Quotation_marks and review throughout. (I fixed a few within the Musical Style section as an example).

Done That's something I didn't know. J Milburn 22:10, 2 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

A Serial comma is used at times, and at other times not. Either way is correct, so just choose one way or the other for consistency.
Not required but a sound sample or two may be useful to enhance sourced track discussion.
Are there no additional categories this album can be placed in? Maybe have a look in Category:Albums and see if it fits in other places.

Okay, I think that's all I can find for now. Great work so far. To all concerned and for the record, I will be gone for about a week, but I will be back for another look. ♫ Cricket02 07:07, 2 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

SUPPORT - all issues have been addressed and I feel this article meets FA criteria. ♫ Cricket02 06:55, 10 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Pass & Support

On the basis it's readable. Learnedo 05:44, 27 October 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Fair length. Fair amount of references. Don't think there's much more to say about the album. Support. (Ibaranoff24 13:37, 3 November 2007 (UTC))[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.