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Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Damageplan

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted 01:12, 19 March 2008.

Damageplan

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Self-nomination An article on a short-lived band that came to an end after guitarist Dimebag Darrell was murdered while performing at a club. It previously looked like this, and i thought i would bring it up to standards. Will be here to deal with any concerns, thanks. M3tal H3ad (talk) 10:24, 13 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Removed and added a free image. M3tal H3ad (talk) 09:49, 14 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
That'll work. ЭLСОВВОLД talk 22:04, 14 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Comments
    • The Metal Hammer reference, is there a article title or author for that?
Was added by User:Burningclean M3tal H3ad (talk) 09:49, 14 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Linkie tool says that http://www.showandtellonline.com/_damageplan/_interview_012904.html is dead, but it shows up fine for me. Ealdgyth | Talk 17:25, 13 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
It also works fine for me, no idea what's wrong. M3tal H3ad (talk) 09:49, 14 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Comment: I think including an image for a defunct band in the infobox constitutes Fair Use; the rationale could be strengthened by asserting that one of its members had died. Is there a pic of that concert? I'd like to see those charts in the discography section better formatted (see an FL discography); better yet move them all to Damageplan discography and only list the album and singles here. I wish the pre-murder portion of the article could be beefed up; although I understand that might be impossible. More later, indopug (talk) 17:39, 13 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Since they only have one album, a discography page may be unnecessary... Skeletor2112 (talk) 07:53, 14 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Agreed, with only one album and four singles it's fine on this page. I also formatted the album in the discography section. M3tal H3ad (talk) 09:49, 14 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
What about a promotional image? —Burningclean [Speak the truth!] 00:53, 14 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
That's exactly what I meant. indopug (talk) 04:15, 14 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
I know this one was widely used for promo purposes, (it was in a bunch of magazine interviews, ect) but the site it's taken from doesn't list any info on the pic. Damageplan Promo pic Skeletor2112 (talk) 07:51, 14 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
An image would be nice, the band only performed 2-3 small club shows so it's impossible to get a free image. M3tal H3ad (talk) 09:49, 14 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Resolved stuff Skeletor2112 Skeletor2112 (talk) 20:52, 15 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Comment Looks pretty good. The band info is a little sparse, though I know they didn't have much output before the murder. I do remember that the band was formed as "New Found Power", and that they changed the name later and used NFP as the album title. Here is the first story from Blabbermouth that I can find that names them NFP [1] The formation section could also use dates of some kind.

There are a few sentences that are a little confusing:

  • "Gale was killed by police officer James Niggemeyer, who was found to act accordingly by the Franklin County prosecutor's office." sounds a little weird, like it could be "who was found to have acted accordingly" or "who was later found to have acted accordingly by.." ect.
Changed to "who was found to have acted accordingly"
  • "Although there have been rumors of Damageplan recordings near completion, they have not surfaced, and the band has not performed since the incident." could use some clarification, like "although there have been rumuors of additional Damageplan recordings..." ect. Though I don't know if they should actually be called "rumuors", as the "post-murder actions" section confirms that there are.
Reworded and mentioned that their manager said there are recordings still out there
  • "A police investigation did not find a motive behind the shooting, although some fans claimed Gale blamed Darrell and Abbott for the demise of Pantera, and that Gale said the brothers stole his lyrics while trying to steal his identity." defenetely needs a cite of some kind, although if IIRC, that stuff about the breakup was debunked, and that Gale's mom did verify that he thought Pantera had used his lyrics in the past.
Cited
  • "Vocalist Lachman joined The Mercy Clinic, which he found as a grieving process." sounds a little weird, too, you could say "Vocalist Lachman joined the Mercy Clinic, which he found therapeutic." or "which aided the grieving process"
Changed to the first one
  • "Anselmo made the statement "Dimebag deserves to be severely beaten" in the December 2004 edition of Metal Hammer." could be clarified a little, like "Prior to the shooting, former Pantera vocalist Phil Anselmo made the statement.." Also, the sentence "Anselmo is the vocalist of the band Down, which reformed in 2006." seems tacked on.
Clarified, and removed the Down part, just seemed irrelevant to Damageplan

The paragraph about Jerry Cantrell after the chart info could be incorporated into the article's main section, it seems out of place there.

Incorporated

Thats all I really see, aside from maybe adding some "meat" to the band/album section, it looks great. Good work \m/ Skeletor2112 (talk) 07:25, 14 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for the comments as always M3tal H3ad (talk) 09:49, 14 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Blabbermouth review of New Found Power, should it be needed at all. LuciferMorgan (talk) 09:44, 14 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Resolved stuff from indopug (talk) 19:10, 15 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Further
  • Add a promo pic, although I think that one by Skeletor has a little too much sky.
  • Is there a pic of the concert where Dimebag was murdered?
Not that I've seen, there was an awful video on youtube that claimed to film it but the quality is so bad there's no idea what's going on.
  • "Billboard 200 peak:[23] 34" was difficult for me to comprehend what with that cite coming in before the peak no.
  • That singles table is not upto standard, with the title bar being too big. See this for how the table should look.
  • "Post-murder actions" - a better word than "actions"?
  • "Following the events of 8 December" - full date please.
  • "although did not win" - missing a "he", but the sentence needn't be mentioned; if it doesn't explicitly say he won then it is implied he lost. I think that's standard.
  • "Vocalist Jerry Cantrell of Alice in Chains" --> "Alice in Chains' vocalist Jerry". Maybe vocalist is unnecessary/incomplete description of his role in the band.
  • "Darrell and Abbott had a demo of the first song they wrote titled "Ashes to Ashes", Lachman insisted it was on the "backburner" until Cantrell showed interest." reads awkwardly; especially the connection between the two clauses.
  • "Columbus, Ohio, United States" US is unnecessary here.
  • "U.S. Marine" - link?
  • Add an 'either' (before the quote) before "hit and miss..."?
  • "Anselmo and bassist Rex Brown favored their side projects and would not communicate with the other members" - I don't understand what this sentence means; clarify please.
  • "They thought it was time to move" --> "move on"?
  • joining playing bass.
  • "as when recording with Anselmo he found it difficult to get him in the recording studio." can be improved I think to "while he found it difficult to get Anselmo in the recording studio." or something thereof.
  • brothers house, brothers backyard studio - apostrophe?
  • Why such a detailed description of the recording of that Cantrell song? "Later, Darrell and Abbott had a demo...just fucking lay it down." seems unnecessary.
  • "including members of KISS, Judas Priest, Slayer, Metallica, Ozzy Osbourne, Megadeth, Anthrax, and more." not a fan of lists of names like this... why not just many major bands paid their respects or whatever?
  • Franklin County, prosecutor, lethal force -- links?
Taken care off everything I'm sure, i removed the width
Tweaked that darn single table myself a bit. I still don't get the sentence "Anselmo and bassist Rex Brown favored their side projects and would not communicate with the brothers, while Darrell and Abbott wanted to continue to write and play music." What does "favored their side projects" mean? What does that have to do with the brothers wanting to write music? Also, why is Bob Zilla not bolded in the template at the bottom? Anyway, these won't stop me from giving my full
support, excellent work. indopug (talk) 06:13, 15 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]
When i tried to copy and paste the single table everything messed up so i took a shortcut removing the width parameter, seems i was sprung :O. Bob Zilla wasn't bold because i copy and pasted the template from another band and just forgot to add it. I tried to clarify the sentence to read "Anselmo and bassist Rex Brown favored contributing to their side projects and would not discuss or record Pantera material, while Darrell and Abbott wanted to continue to write and play music" Basically, the brothers wanted to write and play with Pantera, the other two wanted to write and play with their side projects, i hope that clarified things, thanks for the support. M3tal H3ad (talk) 08:27, 15 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments Is there any reason why Bobzilla isn't bolded on the template?

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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