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Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Blue-faced Honeyeater/archive1

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by Karanacs 15:14, 31 August 2010 [1].

Blue-faced Honeyeater

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Blue-faced Honeyeater (edit | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)

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Nominator(s): Casliber (talk · contribs) 14:33, 25 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I am nominating this for featured article because I think it is of an equivalent standard to many other bird FAs. It had a thorough GA review and some copyediting from others along the way. I promise to address issues quickly (unless I am asleep). Have at it. Cheers, Casliber (talk · contribs) 14:33, 25 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]

  • Support, with one minor comment:
    • "The study concluded that conserved patches of woodland should be larger than 20 ha (44 acres) to preserve diversity of the two aggressive species were present"—not quite clear; should the "of" have been an "if"? Even then, this can probably be worded better.
Yes, it should be 'if' - I stared at it trying to think of a rewrite.....I could try "The study concluded that conserved patches of woodland containing the two aggressive species should be larger than 20 ha (44 acres) to preserve diversity", but I don't feel that is necessarily an improvement. If you do then change away, I am open to ideas. Casliber (talk · contribs) 06:15, 26 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
I think your suggestion is actually better; it puts the patches and the species a little closer together. Ucucha 06:23, 26 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Okay, done. Casliber (talk · contribs) 20:38, 26 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Yeah, I was thinking about doing that - there is a stack of taxons to de-redlink in tapeworm and nematode classification..thx btw. :/ Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:03, 25 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • Comment: Rather a silly little thing, but I don't like the external links section with no links- perhaps you could keep the Commons box, but add an external link to WikiSpecies with a bullet? Altertnatively, are there any nice bird databases you could link to? J Milburn (talk) 13:44, 26 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
No no, a good idea. I added a couple of links which add something. I will look later for the wikispecies linking template, but anyone else reading this is welcome to add. Casliber (talk · contribs) 01:01, 27 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Sources comments

  • Ref 1: language?
Latin" Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:11, 26 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • Refs 3 & 4 lack page refs; are these brief publications? Also, 3 lacks publisher location
yes they are bird lists and brief. added locations Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:08, 26 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ref 9: is a more specific pub. location possible?
added Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:08, 26 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ref 12: What is the journal, who is the publisher?
oops, missed that - it's Emu. I haven't been adding the published to Journals, but it's Birds Australia Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:10, 26 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ref 13: Again, no journal name or publisher is provided. Is this part of the answer?
oops, missed that - it's Emu again. Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:11, 26 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Otherwise, sources look OK. Brianboulton (talk) 17:47, 26 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Ok, having a read to see what I can see. I know a little about birds, but I'm more used to British garden/sea birds than this :) Mostly just nit-picky, of course- your call.

  • "as Bananabird" the Bananabird?
d'oh! fixed Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:31, 28 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Systematis Ornithologiae, however he wrote up three separate" This doesn't read that well- rephrase?
Yeah, I had trouble with that bit - how about now as "however he described it as three separate species" ? Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:31, 28 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "It has been classified" It was?
Hmm, I liked perfect tense here as Storr's classification is still described as a current option in the literature (although consensus is Entomyzon) rather than a classification which is now completely outdated. Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:31, 28 August 2010 (UTC). [reply]
  • "estimates show" Can estimates show anything? Surely, they just suggest?
indicate? suggest seems a little wishy-washy Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:31, 28 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "ento-/εντο- ("inside") and myzein/μυζειν" Shouldn't the Greek text be italicised too? You're still quoting words as words.
That's funny, I could have sworn the Greek font slanted more than that in the past. Anyway, reason I didn't is that usually the Greek text seems to slope a bit generally, but I have italicised it now. Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:31, 28 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "White-quilled Honeyeater, and Blue-eye" Why italics there?
Because they are words-as-words. As in Wikipedia:Manual_of_Style_(text_formatting)#Words_as_words Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:31, 28 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "It is called Morning-bird from its dawn calls before other birds of the bush." Who calls it that?
I worded it like that so I didn't have a sentence with "yet another name is..." The source doesn't clarify how local it is, I presume Queensland but it is not spelt out in the source. I can reword if you feel it is more important than repetitiveness Casliber (talk · contribs) 14:48, 29 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "bushman" Link?
done to wikt:bushman Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:47, 28 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Uw Oykangand and Uw Olkola" Links to these languages? Redlinks if we don't yet have an article (because surely articles should be written?)
okay, done Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:35, 28 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "described below" avoid self references? I see what you're saying, but I think there's probably a better way to do it.
Yeah, I removed it. I'll reread to see if anything needs to be clarified to the description section - do you think it stands ok as is? Casliber (talk · contribs) 14:51, 29 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "intergrade form" What's that? Link?
Linked. —innotata 22:32, 28 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • The article seems to list a lot of synonyms that the taxobox doesn't.
I tended to only list more recent ones there, as many older ones are often over a century out of date. I have listed them now Casliber (talk · contribs) 14:41, 29 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "recognised by its patch of bare blue" the patch, maybe? To avoid repetition?
changed to "the bare blue skin around its eyes" - would "the bare blue skin patch around its eyes" add anything? Casliber (talk · contribs) 14:55, 29 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The upperparts including mantle, back and wings are" I'd put a comma after upperparts and after wings
done. Casliber (talk · contribs) 14:55, 29 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "grey head, chin and centre of their breasts" a "grey centre of their breasts" doesn't sound right
tried "central parts of their breasts" - could maybe do "middle of their breasts". Tricky. I a ma bit flummoxed otherwise. Casliber (talk · contribs) 09:38, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "A bird banded in May 1990 in Kingaroy in central Queensland was found dead on a road after 8 years and 3.5 months at in September 1998, around 2 km (1.2 mi) away." Interesting, but not really related to what had just been said.
To date, I've always put data on longevity in the description section. I suppose it could go in the behaviour section..I did embellish it a bit. Casliber (talk · contribs) 07:02, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Birds make a soft chirping around nestlings and family members." Sounds like you're referring to birds generally.
clarified Casliber (talk · contribs) 03:41, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Birds occasionally" Again.
reworded Casliber (talk · contribs) 03:41, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "They live throughout rainforest, dry sclerophyll forest, open woodland, pandanus, paperbarks, mangroves, watercourses, and wetter areas of semi-arid regions, as well as parks and gardens." I can't help feel there is more that could be said about this kind of thing.
You're right. I am digging up a little bit more to add. It looks a bit stubby. Casliber (talk · contribs) 11:59, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "It appears to live in pairs" Plural/singular mess up- "they appear to... and are..." maybe?
made plural Casliber (talk · contribs) 04:00, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "When feeding in groups" Repetition.
Tweaked first bit instead Casliber (talk · contribs) 04:01, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "a flock of 15–20 birds seen diving into pools one bird at a time while others perch in surrounding treetops preening." A bit fragment-y- doesn't really tie to the rest of the sentence that well.
Oops. Trying to be a bit too brief. reworded Casliber (talk · contribs) 07:04, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The habroneme nematode Cyrnea (Procyrnea) spirali" The what? Links?
I have linked to nematode for the time being, until I can get an article up on habroneme (a subgroup). Actually, Habronematoidea is an article. Casliber (talk · contribs) 03:44, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • In the feeding section, you talk about how they feed before what they eat- seems to be the wrong way around.
Switched around in insect para - what then how now. Casliber (talk · contribs) 09:40, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "shot hole borers" Link?
fixed..incidentally to the true bearer of the genus name Platypus... :) Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:04, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • It'd be great if we could get a sound file of the noises it makes.
  • "Birds Nest or Staghorn Fern," A little confusing, wasn't sure what you were trying to say until I clicked the links
I switched them so it'd be less ambiguous Casliber (talk · contribs) 03:49, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "grasstree" link?
grasstree redirects to Xanthorrhoea, which is the next word anyway in first mention Casliber (talk · contribs) 03:47, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • I'd like to see the aviculture section expanded- is this something kept elsewhere than Australia? Is it commonly kept in Australia? Any notable institutions that keep them?
It is rarely kept. Just a few Zoos. I will try and find some material. Casliber (talk · contribs) 03:47, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Sorry, that seems a very long review. I do like the article, I think it's a good FAC, but I feel there are some more bits and bobs you may be able to clean up :) J Milburn (talk) 15:33, 28 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]

  • E. c. griseigularis is found in southwestern New Guinea and Cape York, and was described in 1909 — can we name the ssp authority for consistency with Gould's ssp.
forgot that one. I was going to...anyway, now fixed. Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:04, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
I agree it is stubby. I'll make a last ditch effort to find some more info to buff it. I was intrigued as it is such an unusual bird to see in captivity. Casliber (talk · contribs) 21:04, 30 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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