Wikipedia

Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/2007 Coca-Cola 600/archive1

< Wikipedia:Featured article candidates
The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by Ian Rose via FACBot (talk) 11:51, 14 April 2016 [1].

2007 Coca-Cola 600 edit

Nominator(s): Z105space (talk) 14:46, 13 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

This article is about the 2007 Coca-Cola 600, the twelfth stock car race of the 2007 NASCAR Nextel Cup Series and the 48th iteration of the event. The 400-lap race was won by Casey Mears which proved to be one of the biggest upsets in NASCAR's history. Mears won the race when other drivers made pit stops for fuel during the event's closing stages. This article passed as GA in January and had a copy-edit from the GOCE in February. All comments are welcome. Z105space (talk) 14:46, 13 February 2016 (UTC)[reply]

  • Support I looked through the article and everything seems neat and readable. Images and sources are all fine. Any issues were addressed in the GA Review. Looking at other NASCAR Featured Articles, this one definitely meets FA criteria. Will211 (talk) 05:13, 11 March 2016 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support I've looked through this again and am satisfied this meets the FA criteria. I'm not an expert on the matter but it seems that the sources are all in order. JAGUAR  19:25, 11 March 2016 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support Made a few minor prose changes but article seems complete besides that. The only suggestion I have is to list the top twelve drivers in the championship points standings after the race (as that's what we've done in the other FAs) for consistency reasons, but I'll leave that up to your judgement. --Bentvfan54321 (talk) 14:24, 12 March 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Oppose on some writing and general MoS issues:

  • After having been through the lead, I'm concerned about overuse of jargon and racing slang. For example:
  • "pitted for fuel" vs "made a pit stop for fuel" (may be unclear that "pitted" is slang for "made a pit stop")
  • "crashed out" (I know what this means but it's slang)
  • I'm wondering what your interpretation of WP:NUMNOTES is when you go through a paragraph talking about lap numbers. The MoS guidelines talks about comparible numbers in the same sentence, but how about in the same paragraph? Should we be writing "Lap eleven" and "Lap 185" in the same paragraph?
  • Same when you get into comparing points in the second para of Background
  • Other MoS violations noticed such as periods in image captions that aren't complete sentences (see MOS:CAPTIONS)
  • Awkward: "After the race, Jeff Gordon maintained his Drivers' Championship lead" He had it throughout the race, correct? So he didn't maintain it only after the race.
  • Rewrite so it doesn't use a parenthetical: "The race is the longest (in terms of distance)"
  • "considered ... as one of the sport's most important races" In this context, "considered ... to be" is more accurate.
  • "he was evaluated at the Carolinas HealthCare System Infield Care Center" Hmm.. can we just say "at the infield medical center" without that whole branding spiel?
  • In the first para of Practice and qualification, does the general reader need to know who was fastest and even what their times were? It seems a bit of undue detail. I'd suggest keeping the first sentence of that para and then jumping into the content of the second para. At the minimum, please omit the irrelevant practice lap times.
  • If you must keep it, "went to a back-up car" is slang.
  • "After the qualifier, Newman said there was pressure to achieve Penske's Racing South's first victory at Charlotte Motor Speedway" Maybe "said he felt pressure"? The way you've written it implies that others were applying pressure on him, but you don't specify who.
  • Better: "weather conditions were partly cloudy with an air temperature of 87 °F (31 °C)"
  • "Coke Rewards Fan Winners commanded the drivers to start their engines" Who are they? Generalize to something like "Sponsored contest award winners"
  • "Mears was caught speeding upon leaving pit road" sounds a bit casual... "observed speeding" maybe?
  • Why are we hyphenating "career-win"? Also, the archive link isn't working on that fn (34 as of this writing).

I don't think it's far off, but it really needs a once-over to check for issues like those mentioned above, and for MoS compliance. --Laser brain (talk) 22:53, 30 March 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Laser brain: I had a look and I believe that have dealt with all the points raised above. Is there anything else that needs looking at? Z105space (talk) 06:17, 31 March 2016 (UTC)[reply]
@Z105space: Thanks for your quick action on these! I'll run through it again today and also do a source review. I'll let you know if I spy anything else. --Laser brain (talk) 10:35, 31 March 2016 (UTC)[reply]
Striking my opposition, source review pending. --Laser brain (talk) 13:48, 31 March 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Source and image review:

Otherwise, looks good. --Laser brain (talk) 14:09, 31 March 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Laser brain: MSN is no longer the publisher of Fox Sports. Otherwise everything else has been dealt with. Z105space (talk) 14:32, 31 March 2016 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
Retrieved from "https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Featured_article_candidates/2007_Coca-Cola_600/archive1&oldid=1086103762"