Yu.ste
Hi edit
Welcome! edit
Hello, Yu.ste, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Ian and I work with the Wiki Education Foundation; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.
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If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 20:35, 9 November 2015 (UTC)
Mirabito_Yu_P3 edit
This review will focus on the behavior and health sections, given the statement on your user page.
Major Points
- Feeding section could use more citations. Especially for the sentences, "The diet consists of mostly zooplankton which includes copepods, amphipods, and many other crustaceans. Approximately 2 tons of food is consumed each day." The same goes for the Vocalization and Reproduction sections; there are citations for the first 1-2 sentences and then they run out.
- The Health section is very well-written and interesting, nice job! However, if the sentence, "Bowhead whales are known to be the longest living mammals, living for over 200 years" is going to be the only sentence underneath Health, I would eliminate the Lifespan heading. It seems strange as a lone sentence. Perhaps the health section could be broken into two sub-sections: Lifespan and Genetic Causes.
- Skeleton of bowhead whale may not be the most appropriate picture for a behavior section. Perhaps switch with the picture of whale resting on water surface from the previous section?
Minor Points
- It might be helpful to provide internal links every time the genes are mentioned, rather than just linking the first mention.
Dmirabito12 (talk) 03:48, 20 November 2015 (UTC)
Henderson_Yu_P3 edit
Major Points The reorganization of the behavior and health sections makes much more sense than in the original article. The language is appropriate for Wikipedia, though it might be best to avoid using 'it' to describe the whale, as in the swimming section. The description of the whales morphology followed by function, especially in the feeding section, is helpful and informative. If you plan on only including only the 'Lifespan' section under health, it might be best to make it its own heading. Another option is splitting it into two - the information on genetics is detailed enough to be its own section. Overall, great organizational improvements to this article,
Minor Points The sentence "Authorities have repeatedly categorized..." needs a citation. In the 'Predation' section, it is not clear if orcas actually attack the whales or if they are just afraid of them.
(I apologize for my draft not being finished. I've been having a lot of difficulty finding information on my topic...which is probably why it's a stub. I will let you know when I have expanded it.) Guyana67 (talk) 23:47, 20 November 2015 (UTC)
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