User talk:Vnguyen09/sandbox

Latest comment: 4 years ago by Sweiner02

-Signs and symptoms: Read through this section and correct any odd-sounding sentences and correct the tense and the structure of the sentences and grammar. Causes: I would use more words like “may” and “could possibly” instead of definite words. Mechanism/pathophysiology: re-read and correct grammar mistakes in this section. The first sentence doesn’t make very much sense. Mechanism/pathophysiology: This section seems pretty good. I would include some hyperlinks to a few of the medical terms to help people who don’t know what they mean to understand everything. Diagnosis: I would avoid saying words like “you” in the article. State factual information and tests that may be performed. --Jeremiahhec (talk) 10:27, 15 November 2019 (UTC)Jeremiah HerediaReply

  • There is a lot in the previous article that is not here. It looks like you copied from that talk page, rather than the actual source. Use the base article! You should not start things over! Copy your work elsewhere, recopy the source from the base page and edit from there. At this point, I don't feel like I can give lot of useful comments because you have not done the correct work. Most of their sections are more complete than what you have recreated.
  • Signs and symptoms looks good and is not in original article, so is a good start!

--Sweiner02 (talk) 04:53, 4 December 2019 (UTC)Reply