Hi HiGyn, here are some thoughts on your sandbox:
- Remember that Wikipedia is written for a general audience. Sentences like "This exam includes a speculum exam with visual inspection of the cervix for lesions, purulent discharge, sustained bleeding from the endocervix, or edematous appearance" stray into technical, advanced language (I have a MS in biology and I don't know what you mean, so it's reasonable to think this would not be understandable to the average high schooler). A common pitfall of Wikipedia's medical content is writing for the wrong audience. It might be helpful to look this over.
- A way you can make technical terms more accessible is by linking to other Wikipedia articles when possible and also glossing the term when using a technical term is unavoidable. When using a technical term like "purulent discharge", you could have "...purulent discharge (thick, gray or greenish discharge that is often a sign of infection)...
- Keep it simple. Instead of "A bimanual exam should be done..." try "Palpation with two fingers, known as a bimanual exam..."
- "an infection of the cervix may spread to the upper genital tract," could become "an infection of the cervix may spread to the uterus and fallopian tubes" or whatever the case may be. Don't assume the reader will know what you're talking about. Spell it out for them :)
- I don't know what "expedited partner therapy" is, this could be clarified.
- Initialisms and acronyms should be defined at first use. So instead of "Swabs can be used to collect a sample of this discharge for inspection under a microscope and/or lab testing for gonorrhea (NAAT), chlamydia (NAAT), and trichomonas (NAAT or culture)." you could have "Swabs can be used to collect a sample of this discharge for inspection under a microscope and/or lab testing via nucleic acid amplification tests (NAAT) or culture for gonorrhea (NAAT), chlamydia (NAAT), and trichomonas (NAAT or culture)."
My major concern so far is simplifying the language to make it as accessible as possible. Let me know if you have questions. Elysia (Wiki Ed) (talk) 20:41, 3 April 2020 (UTC)
Hi @Elysia (Wiki Ed):, thank you for the feedback! I am adjusting the language as your suggested. Thanks again!
- HiGyn thanks, already looking better! Don't forget to sign your talk page message by typing 4 tildes or clicking the signature button on the top toolbar :) Elysia (Wiki Ed) (talk) 20:56, 3 April 2020 (UTC)
@Elysia (Wiki Ed):Got it! --HiGyn (talk) 20:59, 3 April 2020 (UTC)