Zorkon

I'll let the userboxes do most of the talking:

Who?

This user is a college student.

22This user is 22 years old.

This user is a child at heart. They might have grown older, but they'll never grow up.

This user is male.

VThis user is a vegetarian.

This user is not a biological parent.

This user is a Gemini.

This user is single.

This user is a heterosexual.

Where?

This user graduated from Connecticut College.

This user is of Dutch ancestry.

This user is of Polish ancestry.

This user's homeworld is mostly harmless.

This user is a citizen of the United States of America.

This user lives in or is from the
United States Commonwealth of Massachusetts.

Politics

CGThis user's alignment is Chaotic Good: the "Rebel."

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This user is opposed to online censorship.

This user is a member of Wikipedians against censorship.

This user urges others to make peace, not war, with drugs.

This user is interested in politics.

This user advocates democracy.

This user supports instant-runoff voting.

=	This user supports the Make Trade Fair campaign.

This user does not trust electronic voting machines.

no nazis

This user opposes facism in all its forms

GP	This user supports the Green Party of the United States.

X	This user is neither a Republican nor a Democrat.

This user supports the ACLU.

This user believes in the separation of church and state.

This user supports the inclusion of sex education in school systems.

This user supports and encourages the practice of safe sex.

This user supports gender equality.

This user is an ally of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and trans community.

Environment

This user supports the use of wind power, solar power, and electric vehicles.

This user is interested in environmentalism.

This user supports environmental health.

This user supports the use of green energy.

This user is interested in Peak Oil Theory.

This user is interested in recycling issues.

Religion

respect

This user respects others' religions and realises not all people wish to follow the same path.

This user is interested in religion.

This user is interested in Unitarian Universalism.

This user believes in a solid oblate spheroid Earth, not a flat or hollow one.

This user believes that the Flying Spaghetti Monster is as likely as creationism.

Reading

This user enjoys reading fiction.

This user enjoys the works of
J. R. R. Tolkien.

This user enjoys reading science fiction.

This user enjoys reading humorous literature.

This user enjoys reading short stories.

Big Brother is watching this user.

7+1This user enjoys the Discworld series.

LOTR	This user loves The Lord of the Rings, both the books and the films.

This user knows that 42 is the Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything.

This user likes their Martinis shaken, not stirred.

HPThis user is a Harry Potter fan.

This user enjoys comics.

This user reads webcomics.

VThis user reads Vertigo Comics.

This user likes to read Tintin
comic albums and books about Tintin.

food

This user practically inhales jalapeños.

This user eats eggplant.

This user eats apples.

This user loves to eat pineapples.

This user eats cheese.

This user eats sushi.

This user loves to eat pizza.

This user would likely die without eating the occasional curry.

C₂H₅OH-3This user utilizes alcohol at an advanced level.

This user drinks beer.

This user drinks wine only when there's no more beer.

This user drinks tea.

This user drinks water regularly.

This user drinks hot chocolate.

:Scepia/TV/Movies

TDS	This user watches the most trusted name in fake news.

TCR	This user knows that bears are Godless killing machines without a soul.

Trek	This user is a Trekkie or Trekker.

LOTR	This user loves The Lord of the Rings, both the books and the film trilogy.

Internet

ChatThis user has been chatting online with hot babes all day.

AddThis user is addicted to virtual communities.

This user tracks what they listen to on Last.fm.

Web	This user has a website.

This user maintains a Facebook profile.

This user loves using Google Earth.

This user has a profile on MySpace.

farkThis user is a farker.

This user uses Google as a primary search engine.

ISPThis user uses the email account provided by their ISP.

This user uses BitTorrent.

napThis user used Napster back when it was free.

This user uses Soulseek.

Computer

PsThis user contributes using Adobe Photoshop.

This user prefers Mozilla Firefox.

This user runs macOS.

vi_This user contributes using vi.

This user contributes using a laptop.

MacThis user contributes using a Macintosh computer.

This user contributes using a wireless connection.

Games

This user is addicted to video games.

You just lost The Game.

This user enjoys PlayStation 2 games.

This user likes to play games on his or her Mac, but is getting awfully sick of Breakout.

fan-3This user thinks that Tetris is the best computer or video game ever made.

This user once loved Grand Theft Auto.

塊魂	Na na-na na-na na na na na Katamari Damacy!

D&D	This user plays Dungeons & Dragons.

This user is interested in The Jedi Order.
My ally is the Force. And a powerful ally it is.

This user enjoys solving Sudoku puzzles.

Sports

MINThis user is a fan of the
Minnesota Wild

BOS	This user is a Boston Red Sox fan.

This user is obsessed about the O-Train and thinks that he is superior to Sidney Crybaby. 

This user plays ultimate.

SelloutThis user watches the Super Bowl for the ads.

Music

This user enjoys punk rock.

CASHThis user shot a man in Reno just to watch him die.

This user loves
The Beatles.

When this user dies, this user takes the stairway to heaven.

NIИ  This user is closer to God.

  All in all, this user's just another brick in the wall.

^TCThis user listens to The Clash.

This user enjoys
heavy metal music.

This user enjoys rock music.

This user enjoys hip hop music.

This user enjoys country music.

This user enjoys ska.

This user tracks what they listen to on Last.fm (zorkon).