 | This is a user sandbox of Tarispittman. You can use it for testing or practicing edits. This is not the sandbox where you should draft your assigned article for a dashboard.wikiedu.org course. To find the right sandbox for your assignment, visit your Dashboard course page and follow the Sandbox Draft link for your assigned article in the My Articles section. |
Modeling
For decades most rape cases in the modeling industry go unreported. Anand Jon Alexander was a successful designer also seen on Americas Next Top Model, was sentenced to 59 years in prison having been found guilty of 16 counts, including sexual battery and performing lewd acts on a child.[1] According to sources, Anand had raped models who worked for him and some of them were even underage.According to model, Sarah Ziff, many rape cases in the modeling industry go unreported as the people with power look out for each other. Modeling agencies view their models as independent contractors and not employees so models cannot unionize to fight the injustices they face everyday. In the modeling world there is no set fee therefore these women can be subjected to underpayment. They are asked to exploit themselves and their bodies for little respect and bad working conditions often times in return. Models are denied food on shoots to keep them thin according to model Vanessa Perron.[2] Fernanda Ly a famous pink haired model who has walked for successful designers such as Louis Vuitton and Dior has her own similar issues she has faced in the modeling industry. She was once felt up while shooting a look book by the stylist trying to dress her at a young age.This pain still haunts her today.[3] Due to significant lack of regulation the inhumane treatment of models in society can make these abuses completely legal. An agency in Florida got young women who were desperate for modeling work and drugged them. The models in this case were also used to create pornographic films. According to Carolyn Cramer, unless you are a supermodel you are treated like royalty but 99% of the rest of the models in the industry are treated like garbage. [4] The lack of regulation makes it easy for bad agencies to thrive and treat workers as nothing more than a source for profit. Modeling agencies have fought back to consider these claims incorrect and state that models work at odd hours for different clients. This means they cant actually be considered employees and that they cant properly unionize to fight these injustices.Models sign on to management companies and not the other way around and for this reason they are treated as if they are being owned. Guided by a partnership between the American Guild of Musical Artists and Actors’ Equity Association, the Model Alliance provides its members with protection, advice and support in their efforts to be treated as workers in an industry that profits from their exploitation.[5]
Peer Review by Chris Moreno in MASS COMM Class
editThis draft you have done here exploits the truth behind the modeling business very well. I have to say, reading this had given me a new insight on the lives of the models behind closed doors. I think you provided a great idea backed up by the facts and information and you didn't lean into an argument stance at all here, which is perfect since this is a wikipedia article. The only issue I see is some grammar issues among the writing. There were no more than 6 instances where I noticed it was a bit confusing to read, however you still made the points clear throughout the text. These issues can be fixed easily, and I am willing to point them out for you.
1. The 2nd sentence could look like, "Anand Jon Alexander, a successful designer who made an appearance on Americas Next Top Model, was sentenced to 59 years in prison--" (Removed "was", added comma in it's place after "Anand Jon Alexander", and replaced "also seen" with "made an appearance")
2. "In the modeling world there is no set fee, therefore these women can be subjected to underpayment" (Inserted Comma after "fee")
3. "Fernanda Ly, a famous pink haired model who has walked for successful designers such as Louis Vuitton and Dior, has her own similar issues--" (Inserted commas after "Fernanda Ly", and "Dior")
4."Due to significant lack of regulation, the inhumane treatment of models--" (Added comma after "regulation")
5. "unless you are a supermodel, you are treated like royalty, but 99%" (Added commas after "supermodel", and "royalty")
6. "Models sign on to management companies, not the other way around. For this reason, they are treated as if they are being owned" (Added comma after "companies", added a period after "around". Began new sentence with "For this reason", and added comma after "reason")
Overall your article draft was a hit. I actually learned as I was reading, unlike in some bad writings that are hard to read and learn from. I think you have a great piece here that can go up on the live page instantly with minor grammar corrections. I hope you consider some of the corrections and changes I listed just above here, only if you please to. If there are any mistakes on my behalf, feel free to let me know. Good luck on finalizing the article!
- ^ Waxman, Sharon. "The Designer Who Liked Models". The New York Times. The New York Times. Retrieved 28 November 2017.
- ^ Mongelli, Lorena. "Agencies Refuse to Feed Models during 14 hour shoot". New York Post. NYP Holdings. Retrieved 28 November 2017.
- ^ Hsieh, Vanessa. "More models come forward with stories of mistreatment". http://www.dazeddigital.com/fashion/article/35471/1/more-models-come-forward-with-stories-of-mistreatment. Retrieved 28 November 2017.
{{cite web}}: External link in|website= - ^ Ellis, Blake. "How the modeling industry exploits young and vulnerable wokers". CNN Money.
- ^ Gordon, Alan. "Exploitation of Models". The New York Times.