User:KarenZimmer/Overindulgent Parenting

Overindulgent Parenting

"Overindulgent parenting is giving children too much of what looks good, too soon, too long. It is giving them things or experiences that are not appropriate for their age or their interests and talents. It is the process of giving things to children to meet the adult's needs, not the child's needs.

Overindulgence is giving a disproportionate amount of family resources to one or more children in a way that appears to be meeting the children's needs but does not, so children experience scarcity in the midst of plenty.

Overindulgence is doing or having so much of something that it does active harm or at least stagnates a person and deprives that person of achieving his or her full potential.

Overindulgence is a form of child neglect. It hinders children from doing their developmental tasks, and from learning necessary life lessons."

The original source of this definition is from How Much is Enough? Everything You Need to Know to Steer Clear of Overindulgence and Raise Likeable, Responsible, and Respectful Children (2004) by Jean Illsley Clarke, Connie Dawson, and David Bredehoft.

A Deeper Look At Overindulgence

An occasional indulgence contributes to abundance and makes the child’s life better. Overindulgence creates problems in the child’s life and is associated with serious risk factors for the child’s later adult life. It is more than too many toys, material overindulgence. Doing things for children that they should be doing for themselves (over-nurture, or relational overindulgence, which includes helicopter parenting), and soft structure (structural overindulgence, lack of rules and chores,) often create more later life problems than too many things that cost money.

It appears that overindulgence is widespread and that parents are the major indulgers. There are many reasons why parents overindulge with good hearts and the intent to make life better for their children and/or themselves without realizing the accompanying hazards.

This information is based on the Overindulgence Research Studies from Concordia University, St. Paul, Minnesota.

References

Clarke, Dawson,& Bredehoft, 2004. How Much is Enough? Everything You Need to Know to Steer Clear of Overindulgence and Raise Likeable, Responsible, and Respectful Children, New York.

Bredehoft, D. J., & Slinger, M. R. (2011/2009). Bredehoft – Slinger Delayed Gratification Scale (BSDGS). The scale is available from the lead author: C/O Concordia University – St. Paul, 275 Syndicate Street North, St. Paul, MN 55104; bredehoft@csp.edu.

Bredehoft, D. J., & Slinger, M. R. (2011). Bredehoft-slinger delayed gratification scale (BSDGS) manual. The manual is available from the lead author: C/O Concordia University – St. Paul, 275 Syndicate Street North, St. Paul, MN 55104; bredehoft@csp.edu.

Bredehoft, D. J., Slinger, M. R., & Walcheski, M. J. (2011, Spring). Lack of gratitude, inability to delay gratification, and unhappiness linked to childhood overindulgence. Minnesota Council on Family Relations’ Family Forum, p. 8.

Walcheski, M. J., & Bredehoft, D. J. (2011, Spring). Overindulgence, parenting styles, and parent sense of competence. Minnesota Council on Family Relations’ Family Forum, p. 9-10.

Bredehoft, D. J. (2010). Annotated bibliography: Overindulgence and related literature. http://overindulgence.info/Annotated_bibliography.htm.

Bredehoft, D. J. (2010). The disconnect between childhood overindulgence and spirituality. Poster presented at the 2010 National Council on Family Relations Annual Conference, November 5, 2010, Minneapolis Hilton and Towers, Minneapolis, MN.

Slinger, M., & Bredehoft, D. J. (2010). Relationships between childhood overindulgence and adult attitudes and behavior. Poster presented at the 2010 National Council on Family Relations Annual Conference, November 5, 2010, Minneapolis Hilton and Towers, Minneapolis, MN.

Walcheski, M. J., & Bredehoft, D. J. (2010). Exploring the relationship between overindulgence and parenting styles. Poster presented at the 2010 National Council on Family Relations Annual Conference, November 5, 2010, Minneapolis Hilton and Towers, Minneapolis, MN.

Bredehoft, D. J. (2008). The effects of an effortless childhood: Responding to overindulged children. LEA Shaping the Future. 5(4), 26-29.

Bredehoft, D. J., & Armao, C. K. (2008). What teachers can do when overindulged children come to school. Lutheran Education. 142(1), 25-35.

Bredehoft, D. J., & Armao, C. K. (2008). Study 6: Connections between childhood overindulgence and adult life aspirations - A preliminary report. Retrieved from http://overindulgence.info/Documents/Study%206%20Childhood%20OI%20and%20Life%20Aspiration%20Prelim%20Report.pdf

Bredehoft, D. J. (2007). Study 7: Reliability and validity findings for a measure of childhood overindulgence. Poster presented at the 2007 National Council on Family Relations Annual Conference, November 7, 2007, Hilton Hotel, Pittsburg, PA.

Walcheski, M. J., & Bredehoft, D. J. (2007). Practitioner update for practitioners: Overindulgence. Panel presented at the 2007 National Council on Family Relations Annual Conference, November 7, 2007, Hilton Hotel, Pittsburgh, PA.

Walcheski, M. J., Bredehoft, D. J., & Leach, M. K. (2007). Study 4: Overindulgence, parenting styles, and parent sense of competence - Executive Summary. Retrieved from http://overindulgence.info/Documents/Overindulgence%20Parenting%20Styles%20and%20Parent%20Sense%20of%20Competence%20Executive%20Summary%20Study%204.pdf

Bredehoft, D. J. (2006). Study 3: Becoming a parent after growing up overindulged - Executive Summary. Retrieved from http://overindulgence.info/Documents/Becoming%20a%20Parent%20after%20Growing%20up%20Overindulged%20Executive%20Summary%20Study%203.pdf

Bredehoft, D. J., & Leach, M. K. (2006). Study 2: Influence of childhood overindulgence on young adult dispositions - Executive Summary. Retrieved from http://overindulgence.info/Documents/Influence%20of%20Childhood%20Overindulgence%20on%20Young%20Adult%20Dispositions.pdf

Bredehoft, D. J., & Clarke, J. I. (2006). Study 5: Answering questions about growing up, overindulged, and adult relationships. Poster presented at the 2006 National Council on Family Relations Annual Conference, November 8-11, 2006, Hyatt Hotel, Minneapolis, MN.

Dawson, C., & Bredehoft, D. J. (2005). The unwanted and unintended long-term results of overindulging children: Three types of overindulgence and corrective strategies for parents and institutions. In G. R. Walz & R. K. Yep (Eds.), Vistas: Compelling perspectives on counseling 2005 (pp.87-90). Alexandria, VA: American Counseling Association.

Bredehoft, D. J. (2004). An overview of the overindulgence research literature. Poster presented at the 2004 National Council on Family Relations Annual Conference, November 19, 2004, Hyatt Hotel, Orlando, FL.

Bredehoft, D. J., Clarke, J. I., & Dawson, C. (2003). Relationships between childhood overindulgence and parenting attributes: Implications for family life educators. Paper presented at the 2003 National Council on Family Relations Annual Conference, November 8-11, 2003, Hyatt Hotel, Vancouver, BC, Canada.

Bredehoft, D. J., Clarke, D. J., & Dawson, D. (2002). Relationships between childhood overindulgence and parenting attributes: Implications for family life educators. Paper presented at the 2002 National Council on Family Relations Annual Meeting, November 4, 2002, Hilton Hotel, Houston, TX.

Bredehoft, D. J.,Clarke, J. I., & Dawson, C. (2002). Technical appendix: Methodology and selected results from the overindulgence project. Retrieved from http://overindulgence.info/Documents/TECHNICAL_APPENDIX_for_web.pdf

Bredehoft, D. J., Clarke, J. I., & Dawson, C. (2001, Summer). Dysfunctional beliefs that link with overindulgence. Family Forum, p. 2.

Bredehoft, D. J., Mennicke, S. A., Potter, A. M., & Clarke, J. I. (1998). Perceptions attributed by adults to parental overindulgence during childhood. Journal of Family and Consumer Sciences Education. 16(2), 3-17.

External links

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