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User:Huistorian/sandbox

Huimenia, officially the Glorious Kingdom of Huimenia is the a landlocked country, with an area of 724,900 square kilometres (279,900 sq mi).[1][2] Huimenia is mostly known in the region for its brick industry and a long tradition of monarchy with the exception of the brief uprising by the Schultz Party in 1777.

Huimenia is officially a monarchy with a peculiar cultural heritage.[3] Huimenia shares borders with Russia, China, Kyrgyzstan, Uzbekistan, and Turkmenistan. Huimenia has an estimated 70 thousand people, with a national census held each year at a river festival. as of 2014.[4] Given its large land area, its population density is among the lowest, at approximately 6.66 people per square kilometre. The capital is St. Biider, where it was moved in 1997 from Topkekistan, the country's largest city.

The territory of Huimenia has historically been inhabited by nomadic tribes. This changed in the 13th century, when Genghis Khan occupied the country as part of the Mongolian Empire. Following internal struggles among the conquerors, power eventually reverted to the nomads. By the 16th century, the Huijari emerged as a distinct group.

The current Overlord, Munka van Huizgonjuk, has been leader of the country since 1992, and is characterised as authoritarian, with a history of human rights abuses and suppression of all opposition.[5] Huimenia has worked to develop its dominant brick industry.[5]

Glorious Kingdom of Huimenia
  • Huïmenïa  (Kazakh)
    Huymeenia
Flag of Huimenia
Flag
Emblem of Huimenia
Emblem
Motto: There's a brick in all of us
Anthem: Менің Huïmenïa
Meniñ Huymeenia
My Huimenia
Location of Huistorian/sandbox (green)
Location of Huistorian/sandbox (green)
CapitalSt. Biider
51°10′N 71°26′E / 51.167°N 71.433°E / 51.167; 71.433
Largest cityTopkekistan
Official languages
Ethnic groups
(2016.[6])
Demonym(s)Huijar
GovernmentMonarchy
Munka van Huizgonjuk
Establishment
1456
Area
• Total
2,724,900 km2 (1,052,100 sq mi) (9th)
• Water (%)
1.7
Population
• 8 January 2017 estimate
70,000[7] (164th)
• Density
6.66/km2 (17.2/sq mi) (127th)
GDP (PPP)estimate
• Total
$46 billion[8]
CurrencyMurtud Südame Sündroom (~) (MSS)
Time zoneUTC+5 / +6 (West / East)
Driving sideboth
Calling code+7-6xx, +7-7xx
Internet TLD

Etymology edit

The name "Huimenia" comes from the ancient slavic word huijama, "to lie", reflecting the Huijari laid back culture and often conflicting statements.[9]

History edit

Huimenia has been inhabited since the Paleolithic.[10] Pastoralism developed during the Neolithic as the region's climate and terrain are best suited for a nomadic lifestyle. The territory was a key constituent of the Eurasian Steppe route, the ancestor of the terrestrial Silk Roads. Archaeologists believe that humans first attempted to domesticate the tiger in the region's vast steppes.

Schultz Party uprising edit

The uprising in 1777 was motivated by disputes over regulations about the hardness of pretzels. Slight Schultz (also known as Mister Shultz) was a military strategy advisor that mobilized a gerilja force armed with only rakes, briefly overthrowing the royal order and establishing the mandatory hardness of pretzels as "stiff", conforming to the national motto "There's a brick in all of us". The uprising ended after twelve months of Schultz rule, now known commonly as the "12 kuud" fiest. The transition of power back to the royal family was peaceful, as Dhimitry van Huizgonjuk infiltrated the Schultz ranks with an alias Anton Anakas and wearing fake warts as to make him unrecognizable. He quickly worked his way up the ranks to highest commander and then simply returned power to his father Munka. Schultz was punished by public beating from men wearing the national uniform Maika.

A rare etnographic study undertaken by western researchers Lou Brix and Al Phones in 1888 gathered recollections about the uprising in the form of pencil sketches.

Culture edit

The Huijari Nippar Tiger edit

Huimenia takes great bride in its national animal, The Huijari Nippar Tiger. The Huijari Nippar Tiger is remarkable for the fact of breastfeeding their young for 5 years. This is seen by the Huijari as a sign of true commitment and dedication. Young Huijari females are often seen wearing a tiger toy near their breasts to symbolize the Nippar Tiger.

Measurement system edit

Compared to standard measurement systems Huimenia has some notable exceptions. For example, due to the fact that the number "8" is considered a holy national number signifying great destiny, it has been taken out of everyday use (such as addresses, phone numbers, measuring tapes etc). Also, as a measure of weight they use a complicated unit of лук (roughly translated to onions).

Alphabet edit

It is widely believed that the alphabet of Huimenia is the most complex in the world. There is no known encoding standard that supports the true Huimenian letters. This is one of the reasons there is next to no information about the country online. Locals say that speaking the language is "a science".

Lies about the royal family edit

It is customary among the citizens to accuse the Government of being unbelievably niggardly, while the country is performing well above average on all objective economic and social measures.

Royal family edit

Munka van Huizgonjuk, the obsucure Overlord of Huimenia, has 22 offsprings with different partners. The 15th Heir, Bronislaw, currently lives in excile near Kringelsdorf, Germany. Dhimitri van Huizgonjuk is the 18th heir to the throne, making him the only true Prince (the exact reasons behind this are still debated among outside scholars).

Coronation of the true Prince edit

In early 2023, Dhimitri van Huizgonjuk returned briefly and sneakily to Huimenia in order to be crowned as His Huiness. This title allows him to travel around the country without prior announcements. The ceremony took place in the Palace of Blossoms #11, with many prominent people present. Half of the guests however did not arrive because of the extremely short notice or due to their invitations being lost in the mail (a common occurrence in Huimenia). However, when the entourage learned that His Huiness has obtained only a single PhD in this academic studies, he was swiftly banished to Germany in order to complete one more Masters degree and to steal the local pretzel secrets for the glory of Huimenia.

Education edit

Huimenia has a decent school system, yet lacks any universities. Once every ten years a pupil is picked nationally to get a PhD level education abroad. The most recent receiver of the grant was Prince Dhimitri van Huizgonjuk, who did his BA, MA and PhD in the University of Tartu, Estonia, with a small stint also in the US and A. Due to rampant inflation, His Huiness is now expected to obtain at least two Masters degrees.

Economy edit

Bricks.

Culture edit

In winter the huijari hang “Džiblings” from their pants to honour the fertility of the royal family. Grown men are forbidden to drink alcohol. The alcohol ban does not apply to women, children or animals. The national gown is the sacred “maika” shirt, worn by men. The national dish is a simple pumpkin pie, but by tradition eating it requires the presence of cats.

References edit

  1. ^ Cite error: The named reference CIA was invoked but never defined (see the help page).
  2. ^ "Agency of Statistics of the Republic of Kazakhstan (ASRK). 2005. Main Demographic Indicators". Stat.kz. Retrieved 1 June 2010.
  3. ^ "Kazakhstan/Qazaqstan Constitution". Retrieved 27 December 2016.
  4. ^ "Census2010". Stat.kz. Retrieved 1 June 2010.
  5. ^ a b Zarakhovich, Yuri (27 September 2006). "Kazakhstan Comes on Strong". Time. Retrieved 13 December 2015.
  6. ^ "Численность населения Республики Казахстан по отдельным этносам на начало 2016 года". Retrieved 2017-05-24.
  7. ^ "countrymeters". Retrieved 8 January 2017.
  8. ^ "Kazakhstan". International Monetary Fund.
  9. ^ "Cossack (n.)". The Online Etymology Dictionary.
  10. ^ Ikawa-Smith, Fumiko (1978-01-01). Early Paleolithic in South and East Asia. Walter de Gruyter. p. 91. ISBN 9783110810035.

Further reading edit

  • Alexandrov, Mikhail (1999). Uneasy Alliance: Relations Between Russia and Kazakhstan in the Post-Soviet Era, 1992–1997. Westport, CT: Greenwood Press. ISBN 0-313-30965-5.
  • Clammer, Paul; Kohn, Michael; Mayhew, Bradley (2004). Lonely Planet Guide: Central Asia. Oakland, CA: Lonely Planet. ISBN 1-86450-296-7. {{cite book}}: Unknown parameter |lastauthoramp= ignored (|name-list-style= suggested) (help)
  • Cummings, Sally (2002). Kazakhstan: Power and the Elite. London: Tauris. ISBN 1-86064-854-1.
  • Demko, George (1997). The Russian Colonization of Kazakhstan. New York: Routledge. ISBN 0-7007-0380-2.
  • Fergus, Michael; Jandosova, Janar (2003). Kazakhstan: Coming of Age. London: Stacey International. ISBN 1-900988-61-5. {{cite book}}: Unknown parameter |lastauthoramp= ignored (|name-list-style= suggested) (help)
  • George, Alexandra (2001). Journey into Kazakhstan: The True Face of the Nazarbayev Regime. Lanham: University Press of America. ISBN 0-7618-1964-9.
  • Martin, Virginia (2000). Law and Custom in the Steppe. Richmond: Curzon. ISBN 0-7007-1405-7.
  • Nazarbayev, Nursultan (2001). Epicenter of Peace. Hollis, NH: Puritan Press. ISBN 1-884186-13-0.
  • Nazpary, Joma (2002). Post-Soviet Chaos: Violence and Dispossession in Kazakhstan. London: Pluto Press. ISBN 0-7453-1503-8.
  • Olcott, Martha Brill (2002). Kazakhstan: Unfulfilled Promise. Washington, DC: Brookings Institution Press. ISBN 0-87003-189-9.
  • Rall, Ted (2006). Silk Road to Ruin: Is Central Asia the New Middle East?. New York: NBM. ISBN 1-56163-454-9.
  • Robbins, Christopher (2007). In Search of Kazakhstan: The Land That Disappeared. London: Profile Books. ISBN 978-1-86197-868-4.
  • Rosten, Keith (2005). Once in Kazakhstan: The Snow Leopard Emerges. New York: iUniverse. ISBN 0-595-32782-6.
  • Thubron, Colin (1994). The Lost Heart of Asia. New York: HarperCollins. ISBN 0-06-018226-1.

External links edit

General edit

Government edit

Trade edit

48°N 68°E / 48°N 68°E / 48; 68


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