Template:Did you know nominations/The Grange, Monmouth
- The following discussion is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by PumpkinSky talk 23:00, 18 June 2012 (UTC)
The Grange, Monmouth
edit- ... that The Grange (pictured) in Monmouth, Wales, was recently converted to a boarding house for sixth form students at Monmouth School?
- Reviewed: Anne Henrietta Martin
- Comment: MonmouthpediA; hook ref is #10; ref for alternate hook is #5, 6
- Hook ALT 1: ... that the pediment of The Grange (pictured) in Monmouth, Wales, features a firemark, a proof of contribution to the fire department?
Created/expanded by ACP2011 (talk). Self nom at 20:45, 25 May 2012 (UTC)
- for want of a better hook, this all checks out Victuallers (talk) 11:49, 6 June 2012 (UTC)
ALT 2: ... that The Grange (pictured) in Monmouth, Wales, used to house a school funded by the Worshipful Company of Haberdashers?
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I like the Haberdashers hook, and was about to select it (and the article), but it is not supported by an inline citation. In particular, the full name ought to be used in the article and cited accordingly, as well as their past association with the school. BlueMoonset (talk) 07:03, 9 June 2012 (UTC)
- thx: ref 11 is the in line citation - I have expanded the mention of Worshipful Company of Haberdashers to its full name. Thanks Victuallers (talk) 13:10, 9 June 2012 (UTC)
- I'm not comfortable with the sole link to the Haberdashers from that cite being the bottom boilerplate about a registered charity. A page that actually mentions the Haberdashers in the text (this one, for example) is better, and if there's one that actually has the full name on that site, even better, though I think "Haberdashers" in the text allied with the bottom boilerplate is adequate. BlueMoonset (talk) 15:07, 9 June 2012 (UTC)
- Thank you. Added two references, including the one you mentioned. The second includes the full name of the organization in the article, as requested. Also, added a new small paragraph about the opening of the prep school. Anne (talk) 07:10, 10 June 2012 (UTC)
- The references have solved that problem. There are, however, two major issues with the article as it currently stands:
- The article does not distinguish well between The Grange as a building, and The Grange as a school, and it needs to. This article is about the building. It doesn't say when the Haberdashers first acquired the building, but they used it to house The Grange, a new junior (feeder?) school for Monmouth School (see The Grange home page). The text in the article says that is was "until recently" a Haberdasher school; as far as I can tell, The Grange still exists and remains a Haberdashers school, even though the school is no longer located in the building from which it took its name. You might want to have a small, separate section in the article about the school and its brief time in the building, which incorporates the school-specific information in the article; the history section goes into a great deal of detail (too much, I think) about recent changes. For example, the final two sentences are completely irrelevant to The Grange and should almost certainly be removed.
- I wanted to do a paraphrasing check on some of the material, and picked reference 3 (monmouthshire.gov.uk), but it went to a search page. This is not an adequate reference. You need to cite the specific individual document that contains the information you are referencing. Needless to say, I wasn't about to search through all the documents to confirm the citation; this needs to be fixed before I can do the checks.
- A third point: the hook that I liked is now problematic, since while it used to house an entire Haberdashers school, it still houses students at a Haberdashers school. Perhaps "is used by a school funded" rather than "used to house a school funded"? A direct sourced link between Haberdashers and Monmouth School would need to be established in the article for that hook to be used, or at least between Haberdashers and both schools. BlueMoonset (talk) 16:54, 11 June 2012 (UTC)
- Thank you. I will address all the issues tomorrow. Anne (talk) 00:54, 12 June 2012 (UTC)
- Thanks for putting the brakes on. I found this subject confusing when I wrote the article due to the duplication of names. I should have gone with my gut and not submitted it until I was more confident. It turns out there are at least four Granges in Monmouth! There is the original single listed building. Then, there is the complex of three listed buildings, also on St James Street. Next, the old prep school on St James. Then, the new prep school, and its new buildings on Hadnock. Last, the new boarding house on St James Street. Possibly up to six. No wonder I was so confused. I should be finished by tonight. Thanks again. Anne (talk) 20:50, 14 June 2012 (UTC)
- Everything is sorted out. I've also given two ways to access the PDFs, including a "quick view." Ref #25 is a great source linking the Worshipful Company to both Monmouth School and The Grange. There's also a second BBC article that I put in for interest, about chess. Which leads to another hook for you to consider:
ALT 3: ... that boys from a prep school housed in The Grange (pictured) in Monmouth, Wales, won the British under-11 chess championship in 2003? Anne (talk) 05:07, 15 June 2012 (UTC) Anne (talk) 12:12, 15 June 2012 (UTC)
- Much better. The only issue is that I'm still a bit confused by "The Grange preparatory school" paragraph, which reads like a completely new school was started as of September 2009 (the word "established" makes it sound like that), and I'm not entirely sure it was. I think it might have been a rededication and/or name adjustment because of the new facilities, but with the actual move being made in February, it sounds like there's definite continuity between the St James Street era and the Hadnock Road era.
- Aside from that, I've taken the liberty of removing "small" from ALT3 and adding the necessary bolding and also the comma after "Wales"; the manual of style requires commas after country names in the "city, country" (or city, state) construction. Otherwise, the hook is a great one; I think I may like it better than ALT2, but either would be a good choice for whoever is building the prep areas. (Thought: would it be good or not so good to move "Monmouth, Wales," to before "prep school" is ALT3?) I also made some small edits for clarity to the article itself. BlueMoonset (talk) 18:39, 15 June 2012 (UTC)
- Great. The building is new but the school is "old" (I narrowed down the time frame for the Grange name for the school to after 1955 and before 1986, but that's as far as I've gotten. Windsor lived there until 1955 and the Domesday article was 1986.) Basically, the 2009 ceremony was a dedication of the new digs for an old school. I've reworded that paragraph slightly to make it more clear. I'd really like to use one of the chess hooks. Here's a slight modification as per your suggestion:
ALT 4: ... that boys from a Monmouth, Wales, prep school housed in The Grange (pictured) won the British under-11 chess championship in 2003? Anne (talk) 22:27, 16 June 2012 (UTC)
Excellent work! I've removed the commas setting off "housed in The Grange" from ALT4 because it seemed too choppy with them. Agree that ALT4 is by far the superior hook (though ALT3 could be used, as it says the same thing in a slightly different order). ALT2 has been struck, and the other hooks are far less interesting. BlueMoonset (talk) 03:37, 17 June 2012 (UTC)