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Template:Did you know nominations/Roberts House (Canonsburg, Pennsylvania)

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The following discussion is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Mentoz86 (talk) 11:22, 21 August 2012 (UTC)

Roberts House (Canonsburg, Pennsylvania) edit

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The Roberts House in 2010

Created/expanded by GrapedApe (talk). Self nom at 12:27, 13 August 2012 (UTC)

Hi, I'll be back with some comments shortly; just wanted to stake my claim.Sarnold17 (talk) 17:53, 14 August 2012 (UTC)
OK, I'm back. I really enjoy this kind of article, and the historical preservation that it portrays. Here are some specific comments:
Article is new enough, long enough, and meets all policy guidelines as to neutrality and inline sourcing
Hook is short enough and interesting enough, but I cannot verify it. The lead, from where the hook comes, gives reference 5 as the source of the material. I read through this twice, but could not find the reference to the house being the last building of Jefferson College. So, I need to be pointed to the location of the source, or perhaps a better source needs to be used.
QPQ was done
Image is properly licensed. HOWEVER, it is a very unflattering image of a house, and I'm not talking about the condition of the house. The image is a bit askew, it is head-on (rather than from an angle), and the tree in the image obstructs the house rather than frames the house. A MUCH better image is found at Reference 3, though this image may not be available. If you happen to be in the Cannonsburg area with a digital camera, I'd get a more flattering image of the place, because the image really does not enhance the article.
overall, I can't pass this yet until I can verify the hook.
Here are some additional points to help improve the article before it gets a lot of hits:
Overall sentences seem to be very short and choppy. The very first paragraph of the lead has five sentences, when all of that material would sound much better in two sentences.
I'm not sure why the lead has two paragraphs, one with references and one without. Of course, no references are needed at all if the material is in the main part of the article.
In the "Construction" section, the last single sentence should not be a paragraph
Under "Early history" the last sentence of the first paragraph has only five words. Does not sound encyclopedic
Under "Preservation and restoration efforts" I have no idea what the last sentence is about, and why it is even there.
The article has great potential, and everything that is needed is there; just needs some copy-editing, and a hook reference.Sarnold17 (talk) 19:06, 14 August 2012 (UTC)
  • OK, the reference for the hook is fairly insidious, but after reading it a few times I agree that it says what the hook implies. I personally find the new image to be better, and would recommend using that. I've done some very minor edits in the opening paragraph of the article's lead to change five sentences into three. One other thing: the wikilink for Jefferson College is not helpful; you have to go digging through the article to find something about Jefferson College. I recommend you change the wikilink to Jefferson College so that the reader can immediately find out something about the former institution. I encourage you to keep working on the article, which has a lot of potential.Sarnold17 (talk) 10:12, 15 August 2012 (UTC)

All DYK criteria have been met.

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