Talk:Try Some, Buy Some

Latest comment: 10 years ago by JG66 in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

This review is transcluded from Talk:Try Some, Buy Some/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Seabuckthorn (talk · contribs) 15:58, 3 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
Nominator: JG66 (talk)

Hi! My review for this article will be here shortly.   --Seabuckthorn  15:58, 3 February 2014 (UTC)Reply


1: Well-written

Check for WP:LEAD:  

  1. Check for Correct Structure of Lead Section:     Done
  2. Check for Citations (WP:LEADCITE):     Done
  3. Check for Introductory text:     Done
    • Check for Provide an accessible overview (MOS:INTRO):     Done  
      • Major Point 1: Background and composition "The lyrics to "Try Some, Buy Some" reflect Harrison's perception of God amid temptations associated with the material world and take the form of a recollection of his first spiritual awakening." (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body)  
      • Major Point 2: Planned Ronnie Spector solo album "" (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body)  
      • Major Point 2.1: Recording Major portion in the lead (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body and should be compressed.)  
      • Major Point 2.2: Single release "" (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body)  
      • Major Point 2.3: Reissue "Having long been unavailable following its initial release, Ronnie Spector's version was reissued in 2010 on the compilation Come and Get It: The Best of Apple Records." (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body)  
      • Major Point 3: George Harrison's version "After the single became only a minor hit, Harrison added his own vocal onto the same instrumental track and included the result on his 1973 album Living in the Material World." (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body)  
      • Major Point 3.1: Release "" (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body)  
      • Major Point 3.2: Reception "" (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body)  
      • Major Point 4: Cover versions "A longtime admirer of the song, David Bowie covered "Try Some, Buy Some" on his 2003 album Reality." (summarised well in the lead)  
    • Check for Relative emphasis:     Done  
      • Major Point 1: Background and composition "The lyrics to "Try Some, Buy Some" reflect Harrison's perception of God amid temptations associated with the material world and take the form of a recollection of his first spiritual awakening." (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body)  
      • Major Point 2: Planned Ronnie Spector solo album "first released in 1971 as a single by former Ronettes lead … " (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body)  
      • Major Point 2.1: Recording Major portion in the lead (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body and should be compressed.)  
      • Major Point 2.2: Single release "" (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body)  
      • Major Point 2.3: Reissue "Having long been unavailable following its initial release, Ronnie Spector's version was reissued in 2010 on the compilation Come and Get It: The Best of Apple Records." (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body)  
      • Major Point 3: George Harrison's version "After the single became only a minor hit, Harrison added his own vocal onto the same instrumental track and included the result on his 1973 album Living in the Material World." (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body)  
      • Major Point 3.1: Release "" (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body)  
      • Major Point 3.2: Reception "" (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body)  
      • Major Point 4: Cover versions "A longtime admirer of the song, David Bowie covered "Try Some, Buy Some" on his 2003 album Reality." (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body)  
    • Check for Opening paragraph (MOS:BEGIN):     Done
      • Check for First sentence (WP:LEADSENTENCE):     Done
        • "Try Some, Buy Some" is a song written by English musician George Harrison, first released in 1971 as a single by former Ronettes lead singer Ronnie Spector.
        • Definition and notability should be in the first sentence (WP:BETTER). As per WP:LEADSENTENCE, The article should begin with a short declarative sentence, answering two questions for the nonspecialist reader: "What (or who) is the subject?" and "Why is this subject notable?".
        • The part "first released in 1971 as a single by former Ronettes lead singer Ronnie Spector" should not be in the first sentence. I feel the notability should be included here.
      • Check for Format of the first sentence (MOS:BOLDTITLE):     Done
      • Check for Proper names and titles:     Done
      • Check for Abbreviations and synonyms (MOS:BOLDSYN):   None
      • Check for Foreign language (MOS:FORLANG):   None
      • Check for Pronunciation:   None
      • Check for Contextual links (MOS:CONTEXTLINK):     Done
      • Check for Biographies:   NA
      • Check for Organisms:   NA
  4. Check for Biographies of living persons:   NA
  5. Check for Alternative names (MOS:LEADALT):     Done
    • Check for Non-English titles:  
    • Check for Usage in first sentence:  
    • Check for Separate section usage:  
  6. Check for Length (WP:LEADLENGTH):     Done
  7. Check for Clutter (WP:LEADCLUTTER):   None
  Done

Check for WP:LAYOUT:     Done

  1. Check for Body sections: WP:BODY, MOS:BODY.     Done
    • Check for Headings and sections:     Done
    • Check for Section templates and summary style:     Done
    • Check for Paragraphs (MOS:PARAGRAPHS):     Done
  2. Check for Standard appendices and footers (MOS:APPENDIX):     Done
    • Check for Order of sections (WP:ORDER):     Done
    • Check for Works or publications:     Done
    • Check for See also section (MOS:SEEALSO):     Done
    • Check for Notes and references (WP:FNNR):     Done
    • Check for Further reading (WP:FURTHER):     Done
    • Check for External links (WP:LAYOUTEL):     Done
    • Check for Links to sister projects:     Done
    • Check for Navigation templates:     Done
  3. Check for Formatting:     Done
    • Check for Images (WP:LAYIM):     Done
    • Check for Links:     Done
    • Check for Horizontal rule (WP:LINE):     Done
WP:WTW:  
  Done

Check for WP:WTW:     Done

  1. Check for Words that may introduce bias:     Done
    • Check for Puffery (WP:PEA):     Done
    • Check for Contentious labels (WP:LABEL):     Done
    • Check for Unsupported attributions (WP:WEASEL):     Done
    • Check for Expressions of doubt (WP:ALLEGED):     Done
    • Check for Editorializing (MOS:OPED):     Done
    • Check for Synonyms for said (WP:SAY):     Done
  2. Check for Expressions that lack precision:     Done
    • Check for Euphemisms (WP:EUPHEMISM):     Done
    • Check for Clichés and idioms (WP:IDIOM):     Done
    • Check for Relative time references (WP:REALTIME):     Done
    • Check for Neologisms (WP:PEA):   None
  3. Check for Offensive material (WP:F***):     Done

Check for WP:MOSFICT:     Done

  1. Check for Real-world perspective (WP:Real world):     Done
    • Check for Primary and secondary information (WP:PASI):     Done
    • Check for Contextual presentation (MOS:PLOT):     Done
  Done


2: Verifiable with no original research

WP:RS:  
  Done

Check for WP:RS:     Done

  1. Check for the material (WP:RSVETTING):   (not contentious)   Done
    • Is it contentious?:   No
    • Does the ref indeed support the material?:  
  2. Check for the author (WP:RSVETTING):     Done
    • Who is the author?:  
    • Does the author have a Wikipedia article?:  
    • What are the author's academic credentials and professional experience?:  
    • What else has the author published?:  
    • Is the author, or this work, cited in other reliable sources? In academic works?:  
  3. Check for the publication (WP:RSVETTING):     Done
  4. Check for Self-published sources (WP:SPS):  
  Done

Check for inline citations WP:MINREF:     Done

  1. Check for Direct quotations:     Done
  2. Check for Likely to be challenged:     Done
  3. Check for Contentious material about living persons (WP:BLP):   NA
WP:NOR:  
  Done
  1. Check for primary sources (WP:PRIMARY):     Done
  2. Check for synthesis (WP:SYN):     Done
  3. Check for original images (WP:OI):     Done


3: Broad in its coverage

  Done
  1. Check for Article scope as defined by reliable sources:  
    1. Check for The extent of the subject matter in these RS:  
    2. Check for Out of scope:  
  2. Check for The range of material that belongs in the article:  
    1. Check for All material that is notable is covered:  
    2. Check for All material that is referenced is covered:  
    3. Check for All material that a reader would be likely to agree matches the specified scope is covered:  
    4. Check for The most general scope that summarises essentially all knowledge:  
    5. Check for Stay on topic and no wandering off-topic (WP:OFFTOPIC):  
b. Focused:  
  Done
  1. Check for Readability issues (WP:LENGTH):  
  2. Check for Article size (WP:TOO LONG!):  


4: Neutral

  Done

4. Fair representation without bias:     Done

  1. Check for POV (WP:YESPOV):     Done
  2. Check for naming (WP:POVNAMING):     Done
  3. Check for structure (WP:STRUCTURE):     Done
  4. Check for Due and undue weight (WP:DUE):     Done
  5. Check for Balancing aspects (WP:BALASPS):     Done
  6. Check for Giving "equal validity" (WP:VALID):     Done
  7. Check for Balance (WP:YESPOV):     Done
  8. Check for Impartial tone (WP:IMPARTIAL):     Done
  9. Check for Describing aesthetic opinions (WP:SUBJECTIVE):     Done
  10. Check for Words to watch (WP:YESPOV):     Done
  11. Check for Attributing and specifying biased statements (WP:ATTRIBUTEPOV):     Done
  12. Check for Fringe theories and pseudoscience (WP:PSCI):   None
  13. Check for Religion (WP:RNPOV):   None


5: Stable: No edit wars, etc:   Yes

6: Images   Done (NFC with a valid FUR) & (PD)

Images:  
  Done

6: Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:     Done

  1. Check for copyright tags (WP:TAGS):     Done
  2. Check for copyright status:     Done
  3. Check for non-free content (WP:NFC):     Done
  4. Check for valid fair use rationales (WP:FUR):     Done

6: Images are provided if possible and are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:     Done

  1. Check for image relevance (WP:IMAGE RELEVANCE):     Done
  2. Check for Images for the lead (WP:LEADIMAGE):     Done
  3. Check for suitable captions (WP:CAPTION):     Done


I'm glad to see your work here. I do have some insights based on the above checklist that I think will improve the article:

  • I think the lead can be improved in order to provide an accessible overview and to give relative emphasis.


Besides that, I think the article looks excellent. You've done great work, and I am quite happy to assist you in improving it. All the best,   --Seabuckthorn  02:39, 4 February 2014 (UTC)Reply

@JG66:   --Seabuckthorn  15:42, 10 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
Hi JG66! I hope you are watching this page and have not forgotten about this article. As a gentle reminder, I'm putting the article on hold. I hope you don't mind. All the best!   --Seabuckthorn  01:58, 11 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
Ah sorry Seabuckthorn, I thought you'd be watching the article also, but I should have replied here anyway. I've made a few changes there. It's a tough one: I'm thinking some further cuts might be necessary in the main text, and/or I should completely rewrite the lead from scratch … Any thoughts on progress so far would be very welcome! Best, JG66 (talk) 02:04, 11 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
Hi again. I've done a bit more work on the lead without resorting to the more drastic steps mentioned above. I really think that's all I can do (that is, unless I start deleting points from the main text). I appreciate your patience through all this – what do you think of the lead as it is now? JG66 (talk) 04:34, 11 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
Thanks!   It's okay, no need to be sorry. You're right. I should watch articles also. Apologies.   The lead looks perfect now. Thanks!   --Seabuckthorn  06:49, 11 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
Thank you, Seabuckthorn. Great news … (and a fair amount of relief!). It's good to get another one up there. Take care, JG66 (talk) 07:08, 11 February 2014 (UTC)Reply

Promoting the article to GA status.   --Seabuckthorn  06:49, 11 February 2014 (UTC)Reply