Talk:Tropical Storm Bavi (2015)

Latest comment: 7 years ago by 12george1 in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

This review is transcluded from Talk:Tropical Storm Bavi (2015)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: 12george1 (talk · contribs) 21:44, 22 August 2016 (UTC)Reply

Hello JR, I can't remember the last time I reviewed one of your articles. I think it's been a while, so I'm gonna review this one now.--12george1 (talk) 21:44, 22 August 2016 (UTC)Reply

  • Usually there is a reference to the season and a link to it in the lead. For example, "The fifth named storm of the season" or "The eighth tropical cyclone of the annual season", etc.
  • "as it approached the Mariana Islands." - Why no wikilink for the Mariana Islands?
  • "The system was subsequently last noted during March 21, as it dissipated over the Philippines." - The Philippines was already linked in the opening sentence
  • "disturbance impacted eastern Micronesia, with strong to gale force winds" - Wikilink Micronesia
  • "Marshall Islands were estimated at US$ 2 million, while a fishing vessel" - I think you should change that to 2.1 million. It's only one more decimal, but it makes it easier to understand why the damage toll in the infobox is $2.25 million
  • "Total property damages within the Mariana Islands, were estimated at around US$150 thousand." - I'm thinking that comma isn't necessary
  • "twin tropical cyclones in the Pacific Ocean on both side of the equator." - side ---> sides
  • "The disturbance consisted of a large area of atmospheric convection, which was starting to wrap into the systems developing low level circulation centre." - Something at the end of the sentence isn't right. Based on context, I think "systems" should have an apostrophe

Alright. Think that should be it. Just make sure these issues are fixed or addressed in a timely manner and I will pass this article.--12george1 (talk) 21:44, 22 August 2016 (UTC)Reply

    • All of your comments have been sorted, thanks for the review 12george1.Jason Rees (talk) 22:19, 22 August 2016 (UTC)Reply
      • Ok. I noticed three other instances where you said "systems" where it should have been "system's". I should have mentioned them in this review, but I decided to fix them for you. Everything else looks good, so I will now pass this article and list it as a GA.--12george1 (talk) 01:43, 23 August 2016 (UTC)Reply