Talk:Troika (1969 film)

Latest comment: 1 day ago by Paleface Jack in topic What does this mean?
Former featured article candidateTroika (1969 film) is a former featured article candidate. Please view the links under Article milestones below to see why the nomination failed. For older candidates, please check the archive.
Good articleTroika (1969 film) has been listed as one of the Media and drama good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it.
Article milestones
DateProcessResult
August 21, 2023Good article nomineeListed
January 14, 2024Peer reviewReviewed
May 21, 2024Featured article candidateNot promoted
Current status: Former featured article candidate, current good article

Post FAC1 review

edit

There is too much bio detail in places...suggest cutting "He had studied at Cornell University, graduating in 1953. After serving as a United States Air Force officer in the Korean War, he maintained a studio in Madrid where he attended the Real Academia de Bellas Artes de San Fernando before eventually moving to California." Ceoil (talk) 20:10, 5 May 2024 (UTC)Reply

removed that a while ago I think. Paleface Jack (talk) 19:46, 18 May 2024 (UTC)Reply

After the release of Troika, Hobbs continued to work in the film industry, developing three additional films throughout the 1970s. A year after its release, Hobbs was approached by pornographic film producer Habib Afif Carouba with the proposition that he would finance the director's next film with the stipulation that it would be a porn film. This is very confused:

  • continued to work in the film industry why do e say this...the reader would have assumed otherwise, its not said earlier that it was his
  • developing three additional films throughout the 1970s - so he stopped making films on 31 dec 1979. And re "throughout" - they were all being made concurrently
  • with the proposition that he would finance the director's next film with the stipulation that it would be a porn film - this is a jumbled mess. "Offering him finance to direct" or something.
  • It would help if the Fredric Hobbs bio didn't have big "unreferenced" banner above it. Ceoil (talk) 23:58, 30 May 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • with a title borrowed from the Russian word for a set of three, embodied by the three overlapping stories - this seems a little glib, especially given the word is so associated with the Stalin / NKVD period. Ceoil (talk) 22:38, 1 June 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • All of the costumes were designed by Hobbs, and many of the included paintings and sculptures were his earlier works - this is very interesting, maybe create a background section on Hobbs early career in visual arts and how he came to film making. This would also be best place to detail the financing. Ceoil (talk) 23:06, 1 June 2024 (UTC)Reply
Would place "background" and dev before ""plot"". Ceoil (talk) 23:08, 1 June 2024 (UTC)Reply
This would also you avoiding production details in the release section....eg in that section: Artwork and sculptures created for the film were exhibited at the John Bolles Gallery in San Francisco on November 8 that year,[21] before the film had its official premiere in New York on November 21.[20]....which is kind of a timeline mess. Ceoil (talk) 23:12, 1 June 2024 (UTC)Reply
Did some reworking on your critiques. My thoughts on a background section leans towards unnecessary as many other FA film articles only talk about the basics of the creator and not too far into the background of the people involved. If they do so, it is very minimal, which is why i limited it from the article. I can add some of the style stuff to match what I have recently added. Paleface Jack (talk) 20:00, 2 June 2024 (UTC)Reply
Will add this later:

--Paleface Jack (talk) 20:29, 22 June 2024 (UTC)Reply

What does this mean?

edit

"The film then cuts back to Hobbs as he has completed the painting, unveiled as a grotesque figure of a woman whose extended arm hangs the faces and forms of humanity." The latter part is not clear to me. John (talk) 11:10, 4 August 2024 (UTC)Reply

Paleface Jack, any ideas? Is there a word missing? John (talk) 12:46, 4 August 2024 (UTC)Reply
The film started with Hobbs painting something, then cutting to the segments, the film ends with him now done with the painting which is as described. Paleface Jack (talk) 20:05, 4 August 2024 (UTC)Reply
Paleface Jack, I think there has to be a "from" or an "on" missing from that description. What's hanging on what? John (talk) 00:00, 5 August 2024 (UTC)Reply
@John I am currently out and about. I will look at my source to see what I says when I get back.I changed it a little bit in the meantime. Paleface Jack (talk) 00:03, 5 August 2024 (UTC)Reply
Thanks for that, I think I figured it out. Please inspect my edit(s) when you get a chance. Enjoy your travels. Great article by the way. John (talk) 00:06, 5 August 2024 (UTC)Reply
After looking at the passage which describes the painting as follows: "A female figure reclines, extending her arm from which hangs the faces and forms of flayed humanity. A bird (an owl?) sits triumphantly astride her extended limb, with various grisly horrors dangling below."
So as not to get too confusing, I rewrote the ending sentence to read: " It is unveiled as a grotesque figure of a woman, from whose extended arm hangs many faces and shapes." Paleface Jack (talk) 02:34, 5 August 2024 (UTC)Reply
Perfect, and thanks for clarifying. John (talk) 10:43, 5 August 2024 (UTC)Reply
No problem. Onwards to FA nomination. Paleface Jack (talk) 16:40, 5 August 2024 (UTC)Reply