Wikipedia

Talk:Tornado outbreak of June 19, 1951/GA1

< Talk:Tornado outbreak of June 19, 1951
Latest comment: 1 year ago by Sammi Brie in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

Latest comment: 1 year ago32 comments2 people in discussion
Unsuccessful. Newspaper sourcing revealed substantial issues with US environmental information that required a section rewrite. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 01:59, 26 August 2022 (UTC)Reply

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

GA toolbox
Reviewing

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Sammi Brie (talk · contribs) 21:09, 18 August 2022 (UTC)Reply

Copy changes needed throughout. The last section is quite dense and needs to be broken up and better organized. 7-day hold to ChessEric. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 21:28, 18 August 2022 (UTC)Reply

Copy changes edit

Lead edit

Synopsis edit

  • Decapitalize "northeastern" (but not Central as a recognized region)

Confirmed tornadoes edit

  • Remove comma after "CDNS report"
  • "but it was not confirmed because it was not confirmed to have touched down" wordy, consider reword
    •   Done
  • Comma after "Comanche County, Kansas" (MOS:GEOCOMMA)
  • "12 miles (19 km)" this {{convert}} needs |adj=on set. The sentence needs help, too: The tornado was spotted right before a hail and high wind storm, which originated about 6 miles (9.7 km) north of Ashland, moved southward, causing a 12 miles (19 km) wide swath of damage as winds flattened nearly ripe wheat, and hail caused extensive damage to crops and light damage to property.
  • Consider The tornado was spotted right before a hail and high wind storm which had originated about 6 miles (9.7 km) north of Ashland moved southward and caused a 12-mile (19 km) wide swath of damage. High winds flattened nearly ripe wheat, while hail caused extensive damage to crops and light damage to property.
  • over 3 inches (7.6 cm) that damaged Coldwater, Over three inches of what?
  • This violent F4 tornado, which may have been a tornado family, was first observed touching down McLeod County, and immediately striking the south side of Hutchinson at around 5:30 pm CT. Add "in" after "down" and remove the comma after "County" (see User:Sammi Brie/Commas in sentences)
  • Comma after "obliterated"; see the page linked above
  • The last three commas in the sentence starting "Additionally, plate..." need to be semicolons.
  • First two paragraphs in the only tornado breakout subsection need citations.
  • Comma after "one person was killed"

Non-tornadic impacts edit

  • This section would sorely benefit from more paragraph breaks and better organization.
  • Comma after (Morton Mills, Iowa" (GEOCOMMA)
  • "Overexertion" one word
  • Comma after "electric line"
  • Comma after "foot deep"
  • Decapitalize southern; Comma after "Barber County, Kansas"; Comma after "Hardtner" to complete an appositive.
  • Remove the last "and" and add a comma
  • Would getting newspaper sources help?
    @ChessEric, I can assist if you tell me what you feel needs newspaper clippings. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 19:49, 22 August 2022 (UTC)Reply
    Thank you very much! ChessEric (talk · contribs) 20:08, 22 August 2022 (UTC)Reply
    @ChessEric I clipped a few summaries of storm damage from the next day. Do these help?[1][2][3] Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 18:45, 24 August 2022 (UTC)Reply
    @Sammi Brie: It appears so. Thank you. ChessEric (talk · contribs) 18:53, 24 August 2022 (UTC)Reply
    Let me know when you've incorporated that, make sure to run a date script and archive references, and ping me. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 18:54, 24 August 2022 (UTC)Reply
    @Sammi Brie: This is why newspapers (and Grazulis) are SO helpful. The NCEI track of the F4 tornado is total BS. The ENTIRE section regarding the F4 tornado needs a rewrite. The GA may need to be held off entirely because of this. ChessEric (talk · contribs) 18:07, 25 August 2022 (UTC)Reply
    Whoa, I missed this ping! Looks like we're going to have to rethink this. I will fail this GA to allow fixing of this particular issue and am more than happy to contribute newspaper sourcing if more is needed. @ChessEric, you should consider applying for Newspapers.com access through WP:TWL. I wouldn't be here today without it. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 01:59, 26 August 2022 (UTC)Reply

Other items edit

References edit

  1. ^ "Storms Hit Minnesota, Mid-Iowa". Globe-Gazette. Mason City, Iowa. Associated Press. June 20, 1951. p. 1. Retrieved August 24, 2022 – via Newspapers.com.
  2. ^ "Jacket Blown Onto Tree, Pockets Emptied". The Minneapolis Star. Minneapolis, Minnesota. June 20, 1951. p. 1. Retrieved August 24, 2022 – via Newspapers.com.
  3. ^ Fitzmaurice, Larry (June 20, 1951). "Tornado Damage Appraised". The Minneapolis Star. Minneapolis, Minnesota. p. 1, 2. Retrieved August 24, 2022 – via Newspapers.com.
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
Add topic
Retrieved from "https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Talk:Tornado_outbreak_of_June_19,_1951/GA1&oldid=1106712095"