Talk:Sports manga/GA1

Latest comment: 4 years ago by Reidgreg in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Reidgreg (talk · contribs) 17:09, 28 April 2020 (UTC)Reply


Review to be forthcoming. – Reidgreg (talk) 17:09, 28 April 2020 (UTC)Reply

@Morgan695: Please refrain from editing an article under review. When the article being reviewed changes, it can be like trying to hit a moving target. (Better to discuss changes as part of the review.) Thanks. – Reidgreg (talk) 14:18, 29 April 2020 (UTC)Reply

Criterion edit

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, spelling, and grammar):   b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):  
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section):   b (citations to reliable sources):   c (OR):   d (copyvio and plagiarism):  
    Very small points of paraphrasing and presenting information from sources. AGF for offline sources.
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects):   b (focused):  
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:  
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:  
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales):   b (appropriate use with suitable captions):  
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:  
    Passed!

Review comments edit

Prose
  • sports manga would not emerge as a discrete category until the early 1950s. Slight tone issue here: would not is like you're telling a story. We should instead report the facts as established by reliable sources. Suggest: would not → did not. 
  • The 1964 Summer Olympics in Tokyo prompted a boom in the popularity of sports manga and anime. Japan's gold medal in women's volleyball at the 1964 Olympics saw an increase in the popularity I think when the first sentence mentions a specific games and the second mentions a good medal event, that the reader can connect the two. So change: at the 1964 Olympics → at these games, or remove altogether. 
  • I think it's best to keep the See also link to List of sports anime and manga as a bulleted link rather than a {{main}} hatnote, at least until more links are added.
Referencing & verifiability

I mistakenly thought that the links in Bibliography were external links to the sources. I've since found a few of these on Google Books and added URLs to the citations, replacing some of the internal links to Wikipedia articles on those works. Because this is the reference section, and Wikipedia itself cannot be used as a source, I felt that these external links were more useful.

  • Bryce|Davis|2010
    • Google wouldn't show me page 48. While I can't confirm the citation, I feel that the listed information is readily verifiable from a number of sources. 
    • page 49 
    • Common themes in sports manga include friendship, perseverance, teamwork, sportsmanship, endurance, overcoming obstacles, self-sacrifice This is pretty similar to the original, using the same words and order (with a few items removed). Suggest paraphrasing and mixing it up a little: Common themes in sports manga include friendship and camaraderie, teamwork and selflessness, steadfastness and determination, and prevailing over hardships. (or similar) 
  • Clements, p 79
    •   and added Google Books url
  • Clements|McCarthy|2015
    •  verified 15 of 16 citations (the last may rely on a secondary citation to Schodt, which I wasn't able to check).
  • Drazen – 8 citations
    • I checked this against the 2014 "Revised and Updated Edition" on Google Books here which appears to be the same book but it is dated 2014 with ISBN 9781611725506 (the last four digits are different).
    •  Verified 7 of 8 citations. The last one is cited to page 867, which is not viewable in the Google preview of the Revised and updated edition (which is stated as being only 388 pages).
  • Gravett (at Google Books but no ebook version)
    • Unable to check 9 citations to one page
  • Thompson
    • I'm satisfied with 10 of 12 citations. The others, I simply haven't been able to view the source material. I am chiefly concerned with the following:
      • The 1968 television anime adaptation of Star of the Giants is credited with pioneering many "special effects" now common in anime, such as time stops, slowdowns, extreme closeups, and the narrowing of the screen in moments of heightened drama. – unable to view source in either Drazen or Thompson. Since this is crediting techniques to a specific work, please be certain of its accuracy.
  • Tomoyuki
    •   verified
    • One slight issue: In 2013, sports manga composed 33.3% of manga series in Weekly Shōnen Magazine, and 10.5% of manga series in Weekly Shōnen Jump. The figures are verified but the timeframe may have to be tweaked. The source states on the previous page that the statistics were compiled from 2010 (issue 42). The publication date is 2013, but it doesn't definitively say when the sample period ended. I suggest that the easiest thing to do would be to say "In the early 2010s" and, if you are so inclined, to add a footnote explaining this. 
  • Schodt
    • No ebook version at Google. Unable to verify 7 citations.
  • "zenkan" – Manga Zenkan 
  • Funimation 
  • Thrillist 
  • Otaku Magazine
  • Olympic.org
    • The Olympic Museum hosted an exhibition on sports manga in 2020 in advance of the 2020 Summer Olympics in Tokyo, calling the genre "a perfect tool to understand the evolution of sport in post-War Japan." Found at webarchive.org
    • However, come to think of it, the Sport X Manga exhibition (scheduled 2 April – 1 November 2020) may have been cancelled. Their museum website calendar still has events scheduled for the opening of the games on 24 July, so it hasn't been updated in a while. This Swiss government website indicates that museums may be reopened on 8 June, which suggests that they are presently closed. If you can find a source that the exhibition actually opened, use that. Otherwise, I feel that you should probably say that the exhibition was scheduled, and have a footnote indicating that museums were ordered closed under the Epidemics Act. If and when this is lifted, and the exhibition's opening is confirmed (with a reliable source), you can say that it opened (and perhaps omit or footnote its postponement). 
  • I noticed a {{refend}} template with no matching {{refbegin}} template. Is that an oversight? 
Media

Non-free use rationale for image File:Yoban Sādo.png verified. Three other images with CC licences.

Other areas to improve edit

Although not part of the GA criteria, here are some other areas you might want to improve:

  • Consider adding |alt= text for images, such as stylized manga drawing of a baseball pitcher throwing a ball, women competing at volleyball and close-up photo of man in suit with glasses. Note that alt text describes the image for people who can't see it clearly, while the caption describes the encyclopedic relevance of the image in the context of the article. 

General discussion edit

This is article is really quite nice. It's interesting, it gives a broad summary without going into too much detail, has just the right amount of quotations, illustrative images, and really not a lot for me to suggest in the way of improvement. Unfortunately, I was not able to access all of the sources for verification, but I have no problem with those given the extremely few issues I came across with the sources I did check.

Oh, I also did some light copyedit and MOS fixes for the article; if you disagree with any of that, we can discuss as part of this review.

I'll be putting this review "on hold" for your responses and edits to bring the article up to the GA criteria. It shouldn't take much. If you disagree with any of my notes, I'm open to discussion. – Reidgreg (talk) 14:18, 29 April 2020 (UTC)Reply

@Reidgreg: Hi, thanks for taking up this review. I've implemented your suggested edits, which I believe were all justified and enhance the article. I have no reason to believe the Star of the Giants "special effects" portion is inaccurate or incorrectly cited. Morgan695 (talk) 15:55, 29 April 2020 (UTC)Reply
Great! You've addressed all of my points and I'm satisfied that the article meets the GA criteria. Passing GA! – Reidgreg (talk) 16:08, 29 April 2020 (UTC)Reply