Talk:Richard Hutton Davies/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Ironholds (talk) 19:16, 20 June 2010 (UTC)

• "He was born in London" - "Davies was born in London"
• "After leaving school, he emigrated to New Zealand, and after " - "after" twice.
• successive "First World War" not linked.
• "was elected in February 1897 as a member " - "in February 1897 was elected a member"
• "Harbour Board representing" - "Harbour Board, representing"
• "On 3 October 1899 he" - "On 3 October 1899 Davies"
• "but was shortly thereafter seconded to" - ". Shortly thereafter, he was seconded to..."
• Generally, too much use of "He" and not enough of "Davies"; it's nice to break it up.
• "returned home to command the Auckland Military District, but returned to South Africa " - "returned" twice, capitalise the succeeding "colonel" and link brevet for those unaware of military terminology.

Ranks consistified - all now lowercase unless used as part of a name.

• "mentioned in despatches" - linked twice.
• You might want to mention his lectures; "Universal military training to protect New Zealand", written as part of the Public Sub-Committee for Universal Military Training, for example. Ironholds (talk) 19:16, 20 June 2010 (UTC)

All done (pretty much) as requested. I'll have a look at expanding his involvement with the military training movement (etc). Need to find some decent sources on early NZ military history, though. Shimgray | talk | 22:32, 28 June 2010 (UTC)

...and done, after an interlude! Shimgray | talk | 00:36, 22 July 2010 (UTC)