Talk:Renault Korea/GA1

Latest comment: 7 years ago by Carbrera in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

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Reviewer: Carbrera (talk · contribs) 04:03, 17 June 2016 (UTC)Reply


Infobox edit

  • Please remove all of the following unused parameters from the infobox, unless cited information can be added to them:
  • Slogan
  • Subsid
  • Footnotes
  • Context
  • IPA
  • The rest of the infobox is good! :)

Lead edit

  • Please provide a link to the article for the city of Busan

History edit

Beginnings: Samsung Group era (1994–2000) edit

  • Insert a comma after "In the early 1990s" please
  • Insert a comma after "For the Samsung Group" please
  • Insert a comma after "Shortly after SMi started its operations" please
  • Insert a comma after "SMI was put up for sale, with Daewoo Motors being one of the first interested companies" please
  • Can you please reword: "but as the crisis deepened was itself bought by GM.[16]"? I don't understand what it's trying to say
  • Insert a comma after "Negotiations with Renault started in December 1998" please
  • Add "Samsung Commercial Vehicles was kept by Samsung, but finally it filed for bankruptcy at the end of 2000.[12][14]" to the previous paragraph please
  • Insert a comma after "From 1998" please
  • Add "From 1998 Renault Samsung Motors sold cars in Chile with the introduction of the SQ5 (the current SM5).[19]" to the previous paragraph please

Later developments: Renault era (2000–present) edit

  • Insert a "the" before "company's results began to improve" please
  • What do you mean by "results", and what improved about them?
  • "became basically" --> "basically became"
  • Insert a "both" before "dominant automakers in the South Korean market," please

Facilities edit

Manufacturing edit

  • Insert a "the" before "capacity to manufacture 300,000 cars per year." please
  • Add "The plant is divided into seven production shops (stamping, body, painting, bumper, assembly, al-casting and engine).[48]" to the previous paragraph please

Research and development edit

  • Please provide a link to the article for the district of Giheung
  • Please provide a link to the article for the city of Seoul

Administration edit

  • "The RSM's head offices are located at Gasan-dong, Seoul.[54] There also are administrative offices in Busan.[49]" --> "The RSM's head offices are located at Gasan-dong,[54] Seoul, with additional administrative offices in Busan.[49]"

Branding edit

Logos edit

  • "Renault Samsung Motors has two logos, the corporate logo and the marque logo.[55][56]" --> "Renault Samsung Motors has two logos: the corporate logo and the marque logo.[55][56]"

End of GA Review: edit

Another well-worded article! Outstanding work! Most of these are just grammatical or punctuational issues, so nothing big there. On hold for seven days to allow for changes and improvements to the article. @PING me with questions. Thanks again! Carbrera (talk) 04:03, 17 June 2016 (UTC).Reply

Hi, Carbrera, thanks for reviewing the article! Let's see how it goes...
I fixed most of the issues you pointed me out. However, there's a couple of things which I think need your input.
  • I replaced "(...)but as the crisis deepened was itself bought by GM" with "(...) but, as the crisis deepened, Daewoo Motors itself was bought by GM". Do you think that way is clearer or is still a confusing wording?
  • I replaced "results" with "sales", as that's the improvement both sources mention. Do you think is less ambiguous?. Urbanoc (talk) 02:26, 19 June 2016 (UTC)Reply
  Done, cheers. Urbanoc (talk)