Talk:Nestory Irankunda/GA2
GA Review
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Reviewer: Idiosincrático (talk · contribs) 00:46, 8 September 2023 (UTC)
Will be reviewing this article in due season: Idiosincrático (talk) 00:46, 8 September 2023 (UTC)
GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not) |
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Comments
editEarly life
2020–22: Development > change to "2020–2022: Development
2022–23: Breakthrough season
2023–24
International career
Player profile
Personal life
Career statistics
Honours
Other
External link
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I have more issues with the article, but I'll leave as is for now, let me know if you have any problems. I have many issues with your reference formatting, All need access-dates. Any offical, non-news outlet source needs to be listed as a publisher, not a website. Eg: Adelaide United FC, Football Australia and Department of Education South Australia.
Reply
edit@Idiosincrático I have taken in most of your reviews, including the citations and rechecked most of them if I could. I have a question about what you mean with "Reword, try using semi-colons, helps alot for sentences like this or consider splitting the sentence". Can you give me an example of what you mean. Cheers, JC Kotisow (talk) 04:10, 8 September 2023 (UTC)
- Just thought this sentence was too hard to read: "Troubled with disciplinary issues, Irankunda was openly criticised by the media for his rash actions, notably starting a brawl in the match against Western Sydney Wanderers that involved Wanderers' captain Marcelo getting sent-off for headlocking Irankunda after he provoked Calem Nieuwenhof and an off-camera booking for kicking the broadcaster’s pitchside microphone in a match against Perth Glory on 23 April 2023." – figured there was probably a better way to word it. Say:
- "Troubled with disciplinary issues, Irankunda has been criticised by certain media outlets for various rash actions on the pitch. He notably started a brawl in a match against Western Sydney Wanderers, the fight resulted in Wanderers' captain Marcelo getting sent-off for headlocking Irankunda after he provoked Calem Nieuwenhof; in a match against Perth Glory in April 2023, Irankunda also received an off-camera booking for kicking a broadcaster's pitch side microphone. – This is just an example, you don't have to use it, but I think it's an improvement. I noticed you made some changes, I'll have another read through later this week... Hope this helps :) Idiosincrático (talk) 11:51, 8 September 2023 (UTC)
- @Idiosincrático I see what you mean and I completely agree. I will change it soon and hope you give it a read in the coming weeks. Cheers, JC Kotisow (talk) 00:23, 9 September 2023 (UTC)
Further comments
editGood stuff, I made a few minor changes on the article, just a couple small things below...
- Citation #2 > needs access date
- Citation #60 > Football Australia needs to go into the publisher section
- De-link A-League after its mentioned for a second time in the lead. > "debutant in A-League history"
- Also in lead: "he led the Australia U17 squad to qualification" > "he helped lead the Australia U17 squad to qualification"
- Early life: "Growing up in Adelaide, Nestory found" > "Growing up in Adelaide, Irankunda found"
- Early life: "eventually invited Nestory to trial for the youth" > "eventually invited him to trial for the youth"
- Do you have a source which has his NPL statistics that are listed in his infobox?
@JC Kotisow: Other than that, I might make some other small minor changes and a source review, then I'll see that the article is promoted in no time. Great article :) Idiosincrático (talk) 05:09, 12 September 2023 (UTC)
- @Idiosincrático Gameday is the main reliant source for NPL statistics and DRIBL is also used but is harder to navigate for statistics. I put two links with one for Gameday that has his statistics between 2021 and 2022 and one with DRIBL for 2023 statistics. I have fixed based on what you commented. Cheers, JC Kotisow (talk) 05:48, 12 September 2023 (UTC)
- @Idiosincrático Just got your message. Again, thanks for reviewing the article, I know it takes a lot out of your time. Your views as well as the previous reviewer were helpful and insightful. Hopefully, we can help we each other again. Have a good day, JC Kotisow (talk) 07:09, 12 September 2023 (UTC)
Closing notes
- Just on the previous GA review, I believe the concern for the lack of neutrality, issues with writing, and listed 'other notes' have all been addressed through this review and since the previous discussion was closed. As for the sourcing, I've completed a lengthy spot check and recognise that refs such as keepup.com and club sources are used heavily. But as the primary A-League outlet since the 2020 takeover (site closely associated with the APL), I believe its use, along with club sources, are appropriate for this article. As a result, I am passing this review, brought to standard during review.