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![]() | A fact from Mexican music in Chile appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the Did you know column on 22 July 2020 (check views). The text of the entry was as follows:
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- The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Cwmhiraeth (talk) 05:16, 17 July 2020 (UTC)
( )
... that Mexican music is common in Chilean national-day celebrations of Fiestas Patrias?
- "...the corrido danzado, with or without poetic text, to the extreme that its national dispersion [in Chile] is today on par with that of the cueca, and that it is more intensely played than cueca, proof of which is that it is played in the Fiestas Patrias of September 18 in many localities of Chile." [1]
- "The Chileans who live in southern part of the country have incorporated Mexican music as part of their culture many decades ago" [2]
- "[The corridos] national dispersion [in Chile] is today on par with that of the cueca" [3]
- "the people who like Mexican music is mostly from the south [of Chile]" (Montoya & Díaz, 2017, p. 15)
- "one can apreciate today the attachment of cinema and folk music of Mexico in the lower classes, in particular those of the rural world" [4],
- ALT1:
... that in rural areas of south-central Chile, Mexican music is widely popular?Sources: - ALT2:
... that Mexican music is widely popular in rural areas of Chile? - ALT3:
... that Mexican music is popular in south-central Chile?
- ALT1:
Created by Dentren (talk). Self-nominated at 07:03, 20 May 2020 (UTC).
- Reviewed: Group of Personal Friends
I noticed several spelling mistakes and some grammatical issues. I fixed one for you, but can you please run the whole article through a spellcheck program and fix the spelling mistakes? In terms of grammar/usage I can see you are probably not a native speaker, so I'll point out a few specific problems for you:
- "Milieu" is unnecessarily formal. I would combine the first two sentences with "especially among the rural lower class".
- "Specialized in" should be either "specializing in", to avoid a garden-path sentence.
- "Continue": Subject-verb agreement.
- In English a radio station cannot be referred to as a "radio".
- "Live-long" should be "lifelong".
- "To" is needed to introduce the infinitive in "sought isolate".
- "Denounced of" should be "denounced for".
- "The dictatorship did never supressed Mexican music as a whole but came distinguish different strands, some of which were actually promoted." This sentence doesn't make sense as a whole, please reword.
- There are more issues, but they look like simple proofreading errors rather than language problems. Overall, I recommend using this tool to translate between English and Spanish; I use it all the time to help me write Spanish Wikipedia articles. You can type short phrases like "se trata de" on the left, and out comes phrases like "it's about" on the right. Always read both sides of the translation for context, to make sure that the sample text is using the phrase in the same way that you want to use it. I think of it as a nice middle ground between a dictionary and Google Translate. -- King of ♥ ♦ ♣ ♠ 05:07, 13 June 2020 (UTC)
- @Dentren: There are still lots of errors. You introduced the typo "spwhere" in one of your more recent edits. There are still spelling and grammar mistakes throughout the entire article. -- King of ♥ ♦ ♣ ♠ 21:23, 21 June 2020 (UTC)
- Perhaps it's time to apply to WP:GOCE. Yoninah (talk) 20:06, 22 June 2020 (UTC)
I see that nothing was done about the copyediting, so I did it myself to help this along. I would appreciate your adding a short "Background" section explaining what Mexican music is; maybe mention the different types of music. Otherwise, sentences like
By the 1970s, the popularity of the corrido was considered to be on par with the local cueca
make no sense to the casual reader. Thank you, Yoninah (talk) 12:24, 6 July 2020 (UTC)
- Perhaps it's time to apply to WP:GOCE. Yoninah (talk) 20:06, 22 June 2020 (UTC)
- Yoninah, thank you for your help. A have tried to adhere strictly to what sources state as to avoid any personal narrative on the topic. This is the reason on why the article have had some quirks in its prose. I have made some fixes and added some context, as you pointed out Dentren | Talk 22:29, 9 July 2020 (UTC)
- @Dentren: thank you, the page looks much better now. I made a few additional edits and moved External links to its usual place under References. Weird. An IP just reverted my edits. But I reverted him.
- Now to the hook. ALT0 talks about something that may not be familiar to an international audience. ALTs 1, 2, and 3 are just statements of fact. They aren't so hooky and they may contradict the article, as while the hook is emphasizing popularity among lower classes, the article states that popularity has increased among upper classes over the past 20 years. I think you have a lot of other good information in the article that would lend itself to an interesting hook, such as the political angle or the exiles supplying Chileans with records. If you need help, I could suggest something. Yoninah (talk) 22:49, 9 July 2020 (UTC)
- Why would hooks need to be familiar to an "international audience" (whatever that means)? They have to be interesting. I think Al10 is fine, but if you have any alternative hook proposal I am open to that too. Regarding the possible contradiction the genre is still heavily associated with the rural world and has its stronghold there (see the external links). Dentren | Talk 22:56, 9 July 2020 (UTC)
- @Dentren: one of the requirements of DYK hooks is that they are
interesting to a broad audience
. I'm just here to try to help you increase clicks on your article while the hook is on the main page. If you want to run with ALT0, I would like to know whatnational-day celebrations
means. Do you meannational celebrations
? I also think you should add a translation of the name as it appears in the main article,(Homeland Holidays)
. Yoninah (talk) 23:36, 9 July 2020 (UTC)
- For what it's worth: as someone who isn't from the region I thought ALT1 to ALT3 were interesting and if anything might actually have broader appeal than ALT0. Narutolovehinata5 tccsdnew 10:45, 11 July 2020 (UTC)
- Yoninah, I appreciate your interest in helping. For me its clear that ALT0 may arise more interest, because Chile and Mexico are two different countries far appart from each other. I see many DYK hooks about obscure USA topics like DYK ".. that the first state superintendent of schools for Georgia was a one-armed former dentist?", so see no problem with a a hook wich is names two countries (that should be known by an educated public) sayin that the music one country is played in the national day of the other. That is remarcable. Would you say the same if Australian music was played in the US national day?
- Anyway, there is a reason on why I suggested various alts, and that is as to let other to decide the which hook to put. I just wanted to make clear that the criticism of ALT0 here is biased. Dentren | Talk 10:22, 14 July 2020 (UTC)
- @Dentren: I'm not sure how you deduced that my questioning of ALT0 is
biased
. In my last post I said,If you want to run with ALT0, I would like to know what
Please explain that and we can close on ALT0. Thanks, Yoninah (talk) 10:37, 14 July 2020 (UTC)national-day celebrations
means.
- change "national-day celebrations" for "national-day festivities" is that make things more clear. That national days are remebembered with celebrations and festivities does not need further explanation than this. Its a common phenomenon across many countries. Going more into details would be like explaining monarchy because the general public does not live in monarchy. Dentren | Talk 09:16, 16 July 2020 (UTC)
- Thank you. I found the target article at National day so will adjust the hook this way:
- ALT0a: ... that Mexican music is common in Chile during the national day celebrations of Fiestas Patrias?
Here is a full review: New enough, long enough, well referenced. As all sources are foreign-language or offline, unable to check for close paraphrasing. Foreign-language ALT0a hook ref AGF and cited inline. Image in article is freely licensed. No QPQ needed for nominator with less than 5 DYK credits. ALT0a good to go. Yoninah (talk) 10:35, 16 July 2020 (UTC)
- @Dentren: I'm not sure how you deduced that my questioning of ALT0 is
- For what it's worth: as someone who isn't from the region I thought ALT1 to ALT3 were interesting and if anything might actually have broader appeal than ALT0. Narutolovehinata5 tccsdnew 10:45, 11 July 2020 (UTC)
- @Dentren: one of the requirements of DYK hooks is that they are