Talk:Live in Cook County Jail

Latest comment: 4 years ago by Ojorojo in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

This review is transcluded from Talk:Live in Cook County Jail/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Ojorojo (talk · contribs) 17:06, 24 August 2019 (UTC)Reply

I'll review this. It's a well-done article, so it should go quickly.

  • Lead – I think Chicago should be added after "Cook County Jail". "Tracks" is best used when discussing a recording on an album, otherwise "songs" or something similar is more clear. "Live album" and "backing band" are well understood and don't need to be linked (also "cells", "boxers", etc. in the rest of the article). Maybe combine the 2nd and 3rd sentences, so "performed for prisoners" isn't mentioned twice. Several sentences in the lead appear nearly the same later in the article. Changing the wording or order would make it less repetitious.
  • Background – Maybe add "Mister Kelly's, a popular nightclub in Chicago,".
  • Composition – Maybe "Composition and recording", since the official introduction and Szymczyk are mentioned. In the {{listen}} box, a quote mark isn't really needed before Medley: "3 O'Clock Blues", "Darlin' You Know I Love You" and it doesn't need to be repeated under description (|format= is no longer used; |type=music may be added to display music notes to reinforce that it's a music sample). Do we know that other songs haven't been left off the album (39 minutes seems rather short)? Also "track" is overused; try for variety. Perhaps add that most of the songs have also been in his repertoire since the 1950s and several were hits ("3 O'Clock", "Every Day", "Please Accept", "Sweet Sixteen", and the recent "Thrill"). Although in the ref, "Thrill" isn't really a "more recent composition" (written in 1951) and "Please Accept" dates to at least 1958. Also, "Every Day" is a brief, fast tempo version – the "Pop: And that is why" article describes it pretty well.
    Maybe something like: "In choosing material, King overlooked his more recent popular tunes. Instead, he reached back to his earlier hits – songs which had been in his live repertoire since the 1950s. [Perhaps reinforcing the nostalgia?] "3 O'Clock Blues", "Darlin' You Know I Love You", and "Every Day I Have the Blues" were important hits early in his career and "Please Accept My Love", "Worry, Worry, Worry", and "Sweet Sixteen" date from 1958–1960. The sole contemporary number, "The Thrill Is Gone" (from earlier in 1970), was his biggest hit in recent years. Earlier performances of five of the songs on Live in Cook County Jail had also appeared on Live at the Regal." —Ojorojo (talk) 17:15, 1 September 2019 (UTC)Reply
  • Track listing – I'd use the writers as listed on the original LP[1][2] and note in the section something like: "Writer credits are taken from the original ABC album release. Reissues and other recordings often list different writers." Add the correct ones as footnotes, when you know they're wrong ("3 O'Clock" by Lowell Fulson, "Thrill" by Darnell & Hawkins, "Please Accept" by Clarence Garlow). Maybe add that Taub and Ling (wrong link) are pseudonyms for record company owners the Bihari brothers, who often claim a credit, although they didn't actually write anything.
    I went ahead and added efns. Please change or revert as you see fit. —Ojorojo (talk) 17:15, 1 September 2019 (UTC)Reply
  • Personnel – Use nbsp or {{snd}} for musicians.[someone fixed these] The instruments shouldn't be capitalized or linked (all common). Semicolon markup shouldn't be used (see MOS:PSEUDOHEAD).

Ojorojo (talk) 17:06, 24 August 2019 (UTC)Reply

Hi there! Thank you for taking up this review. Sorry for the late response, I blame a combination of real life issues while dealing with a cold. Anyway, I think I've taken care of all the issues you've brought up. For the lead, I combined the second and third sentence to remove the repetition of "perform for prisoners." As a result, the first and second paragraph were really short, so I just combined the two. For the composition section, I'll admit, I kinda just took what you suggested and slightly edited it. I thought it was well written. Hopefully that works. Also, thank you for the edits to the tracklisting section, that was a lot more comprehensive than I think I could have done! Famous Hobo (talk) 18:52, 3 September 2019 (UTC)Reply
@Ojorojo: Forgot to ping. Famous Hobo (talk) 18:53, 3 September 2019 (UTC)Reply
No hurry. With your changes, I think we're about done. I wonder about the new second sentence "At the insistence". The way the refs talk about it, it seems that Moore asked or requested King to perform. Also, the wording may be read that Moore wanted slow blues songs, which doesn't appear to be supported by Adelt, etc. Maybe something like "Agreeing to a request by jail warden Winston Moore, King and his band performed for a audience of 2,117 prisoners, most of whom were young black men. King's set list consisted mostly of slow blues songs, which had been hits earlier in his career. When King told ..." With four sentences, the paragraph can again break at "Live in Cook County..."
I don't know why ToonIsALoon feels that it is necessary to add the ref for RS 500 in the lead. Normally this is done for controversial statements or those likely to be challenged (see MOS:CITELEAD). Maybe they can explain.
Ojorojo (talk) 13:46, 4 September 2019 (UTC)Reply
no reason, just the curse of copy and paste whilst updating various albums. Will remove going forward if an issue. ToonIsALoon (talk) 15:17, 4 September 2019 (UTC)Reply
@Ojorojo: Updated the lead. @ToonIsALoon: Personally I prefer not having citations in the lede, but it really doesn't matter, so I'll just leave it be. Famous Hobo (talk) 16:05, 5 September 2019 (UTC)Reply
Works for me. Pass. —Ojorojo (talk) 16:41, 5 September 2019 (UTC)Reply
GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, spelling, and grammar):   b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):  
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section):   b (citations to reliable sources):   c (OR):   d (copyvio and plagiarism):  
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects):   b (focused):  
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:  
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:  
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales):   b (appropriate use with suitable captions):  
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:  

Famous Hobo: Another job well done. —Ojorojo (talk) 16:41, 5 September 2019 (UTC)Reply