Talk:Life with My Sister Madonna/GA1

Latest comment: 5 years ago by Fish and karate in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

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Reviewer: Fish and karate (talk · contribs) 09:53, 11 October 2018 (UTC)Reply


Review edit

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, spelling, and grammar):  Y
    • "An article in New York opined that Ciccone would probably gain from selling the book by reiterating the same content that is known about the singer" - I copyedited most of the Reception section as otherwise this list would have been very long, but I don't know what you're trying to say here.
    • "Rosenberg clarified Madonna's realization that their relationship was damaged irreparably" - whose?
    • Clarified both. —IB [ Poke ] 11:25, 19 October 2018 (UTC)Reply
    Better, thank you. Fish+Karate 12:31, 19 October 2018 (UTC)Reply
    b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):  Y
    • "The memoir is divided into different chapters of Madonna's life with the titles like spoiled daddy's girl, the punk drummer, the raunchy Boy Toy, Material Girl, Mrs. Sean Penn, Warren Beatty's glamorous Hollywood paramour, loving mother, Mrs. Guy Ritchie (her second husband) and English grande dame." is completely unformatted, no capitals, wikilinks, quote marks, etc.
    • Reformatted. —IB [ Poke ] 11:25, 19 October 2018 (UTC)Reply
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section):  Y
    b (citations to reliable sources):  Y
    c (OR):  Y
    • "American entertainer Christopher Ciccone" - where is he described as an entertainer?
    • Clarified what all he did. —IB [ Poke ] 11:25, 19 October 2018 (UTC)Reply
    • "Christopher Ciccone is the middle brother ..." sentence is unreferenced
    • Original source was deleted. Added from Taraborrelli's book. —IB [ Poke ] 11:25, 19 October 2018 (UTC)Reply
    • "odd jobs that he did not want" - odd jobs is a very specific phrase that does not appear in the citation provided, and from reading the citation these don't seem to be "odd jobs". Perhaps "tasks"?
    • "including the 1991 Madonna: Truth or Dare documentary" - what does this mean? He worked for Madonna during the filming of the documentary? He worked on the documentary?
    • "In June 2008, Simon & Schuster revealed ..." - unreferenced
    • "The publisher described the book as ..." - unreferenced
    • Both are present in this source at the end of the sentence block. We don't need to cite each and every sentence. If the ending citation does not provide the supporting text in it, then we need in-line citation, else we can keep a citation at the end. —IB [ Poke ] 11:25, 19 October 2018 (UTC)Reply
    • " Feeling that it showed the singer in a "humane" light, Leigh decided to write the memoir" - the word "humane" does not appear in the reference provided, so why is it in the article, let alone in speech marks as if it's a direct quotation?
    • Tweaked it. —IB [ Poke ] 11:25, 19 October 2018 (UTC)Reply
    All those sorted, thank you. 12:31, 19 October 2018 (UTC)
    d (copyvio and plagiarism):  Y
    • Earwig fine. A lot of quotations, which you'd expect I guess, but most are clearly marked as quotes, and are properly attributed (any issues are discussed above).
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects):  Y
    • The article is mostly covering the reaction to the book, rather than the book. The synopsis itself is two very short paragraphs, one of which is about the chapter titles. Could do with some expansion here to actually clue the reader in as to what the book is about. Madonna's life is very well-documented and we have a host of articles about her which could be tied into this synopsis section if it gave more detail as to what aspects of Madonna's career/life are covered. Does it cover Christopher and his sister's early lives and childhoods? Or does it start at a certain point? When? Does it only focus on Madonna or are there autobiographical elements? At what point (both in terms of where in Madonna's career, and chronologically when) does it end? Is her relationship with Warren Beatty in there? Sean Penn?
    A plot synopsis generally does not require what all is covered in detail, and neither does it require extensive sourcing. But I will consider this and try to expand a bit from the chapters. —IB [ Poke ] 11:25, 19 October 2018 (UTC)Reply
    This definitely still needs expanding a little, even if it's another paragraph or two. Doesn't need sourcing, and I don't think I asked for sourcing. See Wikipedia:WikiProject_Books/Non-fiction_article#Structure for some further advice. An article about a book does need some detail about the contents therein. Not asking for swathes of text, just a precis, in particular it would be good to see what I've asked for just above. Fish+Karate 12:31, 19 October 2018 (UTC)Reply
    Slightly better, thank you. Fish+Karate 09:51, 6 November 2018 (UTC)Reply
    b (focused):  Y
    • No issues.
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:  Y
    • No issues.
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:  Y
    • No issues.
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales):  Y
    • No issues.
    b (appropriate use with suitable captions):  Y
    • No issues.
  7. Overall:
    An interesting article, awaiting response to issues identified. Fish+Karate 10:37, 11 October 2018 (UTC)Reply
    Pass/Fail:  Y

Hello @Fish and karate: thanks for taking up the article. Shall I start addressing the review comments? —IB [ Poke ] 10:47, 11 October 2018 (UTC)Reply

Yes please. Fish+Karate 14:32, 11 October 2018 (UTC)Reply
Started already, few left. —IB [ Poke ] 11:25, 19 October 2018 (UTC)Reply
Sorry for the delay, really sorry, will finish it today :( —IB [ Poke ] 17:33, 30 October 2018 (UTC)Reply
@Fish and karate: does it look better to you now? Sorry I forgot to ping you. —IB [ Poke ] 15:47, 5 November 2018 (UTC)Reply
All done, now a pass. Well done IndianBio. Fish+Karate 09:51, 6 November 2018 (UTC)Reply