Talk:Leopard shark/GA1
Latest comment: 14 years ago by Casliber in topic GA Review
GA Review edit
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OK, I will begin a review and make straightforward copyediting changes as I go. Please revert if I inadvertently change the meaning. Cheers, Casliber (talk · contribs) 08:40, 17 August 2009 (UTC)
There are some other examples of singular and plural in the one sentence. Generally using singular looks best as a default option unless one is talking about a group of critters.
- Leopard sharks are wary of humans and pose almost no danger. - This sentence has bugged me, but I can't for the life of me think of a smoother way to say it.
Overall, pretty good and nearly there. Have a go at singularising some of the sharks and I'll be back later to help out. Casliber (talk · contribs) 09:47, 17 August 2009 (UTC)
- Leopard sharks are wary of humans and pose almost no danger. - there are two problems:
- There is an expected indirect object, as in "... pose danger to something" (in this case, 'to humans', but the repetition reads even worse than the missing object).
- The second half of the sentence is a consequence of the first, but the bare conjunction "and" doesn't convey the causality.
- The best I can suggest for the sentence is: Leopard sharks are wary of humans and so pose almost no danger. Sorry, that's not much help. --RexxS (talk) 16:49, 18 August 2009 (UTC)