Talk:Kekal/GA1

Latest comment: 13 years ago by 12george1 in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: 12george1 (talk) 05:04, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply

Lede
  • "...Jakarta, Indonesia which according to Allmusic was one of the first heavy metal bands from Indonesia to make international inroads." - Try reading this phrase; wouldn't it read better if you added a comma after "Indonesia" and "Allmusic"? --Done.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
  • "Through its career, the band has released 7 full length studio albums, 2 compilation albums, 2 demo tapes..." - All numbers less than 10 should be spelled-out (exceptions: if the number has to appear that way, such as the album "8"; or dates, such as January 1) --Done.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
Early years (formation to 2002)
  • Delink "extreme metal", as it is already linked in the lede --Done.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
  • "On June 1996, Azhar Sianturi joined Kekal..." - Change to "In June 1996" --Done.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
International scene (2003-2006)
  • There is no citations for either paragraph --Done.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
Jeff's move to Canada (2006-2007)
  • Delink "Jeff Arwadi", since it is already wikilinked in the lede. --Done.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
  • No references on the last sentence of either paragraph --Done.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
Departure of band members (2009)
  • "Shortly after, Kekal put up an offer of 3 albums..." - Remember, spell-out numbers less than 10 --Done.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
  • The last sentence of the second paragraph is unreferenced --Done.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
Style
  • Move the audio clip of "Our Urban Industry Runs Monotonously" to the top of the section, and not in a random spot within the text, because this part of the following sentence: "The band’s well received fifth album, Acidity, mixed black metal and double bass drum blasts with progressive metal, progressive rock," and the other part: "classic rock, jazz, and ambient styles which led to the band being labeled “avant-garde,..." look like there on two separate paragraphs. --Done.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
  • Delink: "1000 Thoughts of Violence", "progressive metal", and "The Habit of Fire" --Done.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
Songwriting and recording techniques
  • Delink: "The Painful Experience", "jazz", and "The Habit of Fire" --Done.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
Kekal and DIY ethic
  • No reference on that last sentence --Moved sentence, might still need ref.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
Former members
  • There is no reference for the following people: Leo Setiawan, Harry, Newbabe, and Yeris. --Done.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
Guest musicians
  • Again, no references, on the following people: Kenny Cheong, Jason DeRon, Doctor D, Hana, and Vera. --Done.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
Discography
  • Only referenced on "Covered in Filth: A Tribute to Cradle of Filth - 2003" and "elf Krusher compilation: 5th Anniversary THT Productions - 2001" --Done.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
References
  • Be consistent with the dates; on ref #1 there is "March 14, 1999", but on ref #32 it says "10 April - 2004". --Will do.--3family6 (talk) 14:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply
Summary
Good job on improving the article, I will now be passing it for GA. Congratulations, --12george1 (talk) 15:52, 4 March 2011 (UTC)Reply