Talk:Joe Bennett (footballer)
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GA Review
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Reviewing |
- This review is transcluded from Talk:Joe Bennett (footballer)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 10:29, 14 August 2019 (UTC)
Comments
- Avoid single-sentence paras as you have in first para of lead.
- Be consistent with the linking of seasons throughout, e.g. you don't link " 2008–09 season" in the lead but you do "2017–18 season".
- "make over 90 appearances" more than 90.
- AFC is A.F.C. for Bournemouth. Check throughout.
- "parents separation" parents'
- A few really short sentences in the "Early life" section makes for choppy reading.
- Consider linking "scout" appropriately.
- Link Riverside in the first section, not the second, and probably call it Riverside Stadium first time round to avoid confusing non-expert readers.
- "being handed a" non-encyclopedic, perhaps "being awarded a"?
- "The arrival of Tony Mowbray saw..." how long was Strachan there, the revolving door of management!
- "June 2015, [18]" remove space before ref.
- "after making 92 appearances for Middlesbrough in four years at the Riverside Stadium" he played all those games at home?!
- Technical thing, I would advocate using non-breaking spaces between numbers and "million" in those transfer fees to avoid them breaking over two lines.
- Check BBC match report references. Many of them have authors which should be added, e.g. ref 24 was written by Aimee Lewis for instance.
- In the Villa section (and "Loan" section), you mention the League Cup but don't link it to the specific competition, you did in the 'Boro section. Consistency (although do avoid easter eggs, or piping the same term to different targets).
- Traoré needs a diacritic.
- " Choosing to continue in the match" maybe "Electing to play in the match"?
- " in a mixture already described" I'm not following the "already described"?
- Any update since January 2019?
- "impressive first team performances" for whom?
- "Evening Gazette" should be in italics (refs 5, 12 and 15). Check others.
That's all I have, it's a great article. Might you consider adding an image somewhere in there, if you can find something that's not crazy tangential? The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 16:04, 16 August 2019 (UTC)
- @The Rambling Man: Thanks for the review, I've addressed all of the issues above, let me know what you think. In regards to an image, I've messaged a user on Flickr to hopefully release an image of Bennett under an appropriate license. Until then, I could add an image of Mowbray to the Middlesbrough section given that he credited him with turning his career round? Kosack (talk) 07:03, 17 August 2019 (UTC)
- Hi Kosack, yes it sounds like a good idea, both of them. Add the Mogga image and then I'll take one last pass. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 07:07, 17 August 2019 (UTC)
- @The Rambling Man: Added the Mowbray image in, hopefully the captions not to over the top. Kosack (talk) 07:14, 17 August 2019 (UTC)
- All good, happy to promote. It would be FAC material if we could get a picture of Bennett I think. Well done. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 07:19, 17 August 2019 (UTC)
- @The Rambling Man: Added the Mowbray image in, hopefully the captions not to over the top. Kosack (talk) 07:14, 17 August 2019 (UTC)
- Hi Kosack, yes it sounds like a good idea, both of them. Add the Mogga image and then I'll take one last pass. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 07:07, 17 August 2019 (UTC)