Talk:If You See Her, Say Hello/GA1
Latest comment: 2 years ago by BennyOnTheLoose in topic GA Review
GA Review edit
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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 10:21, 1 July 2021 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
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Soon --K. Peake 10:21, 1 July 2021 (UTC)
Infobox and lead edit
- Shouldn't the release date of the song as a B-side be listed in the infobox since the single template is used?
- I've changed the type to "song" as nearly all sources discuss it as an album track rather than as a single. Hopefully that works. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:13, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- Pipe Minneapolis, Minnesota to Minneapolis, plus either separate the city from the studio using brackets or commas
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:13, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- Folk rock genre is not sourced
- Removed. If a genre is needed, I'll look for a suitable source, but I suspect there may be different descriptions in different sources. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:13, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- WP:OVERLINK of Bob Dylan under songwriter(s)
- Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk)
- Introduce who Bob Dylan is in the opening sentence
- Added "American singer-songwriter" BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 10:38, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "released in 1975 on his 15th studio album," → "from his 15th studio album," also, add the release year in brackets
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:13, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- The single B-side release should be mentioned after the later recording info instead
- Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 10:38, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "It is one of five songs on" → "The song is one of five on" but the number of songs initially recorded is not directly sourced as five (half the songs on the album are mentioned as being re-recorded but nowhere does it say all were originally done in September)
- "five of ten" is now mentioned in the body. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 18:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Remove "in December that year" from this sentence because the following one gives the date, though the city can be kept
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 10:38, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "produced by Dylan's" → "was produced by Dylan's"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:13, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- "became the album track" → "The recording later became the album track" as a new sentence, plus pipe single to Single (music) and add a comma after it before writing "released in February 1975."
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:13, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- Add a sentence about the song's lyrical content at the end of the first para
- Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 18:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Pipe CD to Compact disc, plus the single-CD and 2-LP info should be written out in the body with the source since everything in the lead needs to be sourced there
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 18:59, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- "of that album." → "of the compilation."
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 10:38, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- The remix release on the deluxe edition should be written out in the body too, moving the source solely there
- Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 18:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- "with some reviewers naming the track a highlight of Blood on the Tracks, and the song being" → "being named by some as an album highlight, and it has been"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 10:38, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- Mention the Civic Centre live performance in a sentence after the above, as this is fully notable for the lead and follow it with a sentence about the Italian cover version since that is the most noteworthy one
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 18:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
Composition and recording edit
- Retitle to Recording and composition
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:22, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- "on September 16, 1974 during" → "on September 16, 1974, during"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:22, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- "followed by a third on September 19 where" → "These were followed by a third on September 19, where" as a new sentence, plus it needs to be mentioned somewhere in the opening info that five songs were recorded initially that month
Partly done. "it needs to be mentioned somewhere in the opening info that five songs were recorded initially that month" pending. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:22, 3 July 2021 (UTC)Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 18:22, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Merge the first and second paras
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:22, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- "from his brother" → "made by his brother"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:22, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- "on December 30 at" → "on December 30, 1974, at"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:22, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- Pipe overdubbed to Overdubbing
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:22, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- Remove pipe on producer
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:22, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- "for the Minneapolis "Blood on the Tracks" recordings," → "for the Minneapolis recordings," because it is already known that the recording there was for the album
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:22, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- "This session featured a" → "The session featured a"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:21, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Pipe keyboards to Keyboard instrument
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:21, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink harmonica
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:21, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- "at Zimmerman's invitation," → "after Zimmerman's contact," per the source
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 18:22, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- "on December 27." → "on December 27, 1974."
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 18:22, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Can't you add a genre for the song somewhere with a source?
- Pending. See comment under infobox. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:22, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- Progress report: no genre description found in books so far. Several reviews mention "ballad"/"love ballad". Cott (1984) says "the other songs [apart from Idiot Wind] on 'Blood on the Tracks', each of which has its own style". Thomas (2017) has "Lyric song-poem". BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:21, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Is the album's Billboard 200 position really notable for this article?
- I think so, as it indicates the reach, but happy to remove this if you advise so. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:21, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Do you not have a source giving the single's exact release date?
- No, sadly. Not found in any of the sources I've consulted, including Bjorner's site, Michael Krogsgaard's Positively Bob Dylan: A Thirty Year Discography, Concert, and Recording Session Guide, 1960–1991, or Clinton Heylin's Bob Dylan : a life in stolen moments : day by day, 1941-1995, all of which just have "February." The earliest newspaper mentions I could find of the single are from mid-March 1975, talking about it as a new release - I didn't even find any adverts from before that. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:21, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- "on the Hot 100 chart." → "on the US Billboard Hot 100." with the pipe
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:22, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- "from September 16 was" → "from September 16, 1974 was"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:22, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- "the Blood on the Tracks test pressing." → "the Blood on the Tracks test pressing." plus do you know the release year of this?
- Added (with month). BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:21, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- "on The Bootleg Series Vol. 14: More Blood, More Tracks (Deluxe edition) (2018)." → "on the deluxe edition of The Bootleg Series Vol. 14: More Blood, More Tracks (2018)."
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:21, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
Interpretation and critical reception edit
- "thought that the album Blood on the Tracks was" → "thought Blood on the Tracks was"
- Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 10:56, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "in a 1985 interview that" → "in a 1985 interview:" plus are you sure the quote doesn't end on a full sentence, meaning the full-stop would be inside quote marks?
- Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 10:56, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "Dylan claimed that" → "Dylan says that"
- Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 10:56, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "love story," and that it is" → "love story", commenting that it is" per MOS:QUOTE
- Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 10:56, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- Add release year of "Girl from the North Country" in brackets
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 10:56, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "of the album's release," → "of the album's release by multiple writers,"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 10:56, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- [22] should be solely at the end of the sentence because it is used for both info before and after the comma
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 11:12, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- Maybe mention that it was noted by Lyn Van Matre of the Chicago Tribune?
- Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 11:10, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- Add commas around "in The Guardian"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 11:10, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- Note Timothy Hampton as being from Critical Inquiry, also should the full-stop be inside quote marks or not per my earlier comment?
- Added journal, moved full-stop (per source). BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 14:03, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Mention what publications John Edmiston and Mike Kalina were writing for
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 14:03, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- "covered the same topic" → "covers the same topic"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 11:10, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- Add release year of "I Threw It All Away" in brackets
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 11:10, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "were the weakest two tracks on the on album because they were" → "are the weakest two tracks on the album due to being"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 11:10, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- Remove the excess semi-colon directly after [29]
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 14:09, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- "and that it was" → "and that the song was"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 11:10, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "Jon Landau in Rolling Stone criticised" → "Jon Landau of Rolling Stone criticized"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 11:10, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "were "the two" → "are "the two"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 11:10, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "that he loved,[35] A" → "that he loved;[35] a"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 14:09, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Introduce Andrew Ford as being from The Sydney Morning Herald, plus merge this para with the above one
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 14:09, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- "Dylan's delivery was" → "and Dylan's delivery was"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 11:10, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- Why is the couplet referred to as a line? If this is what the source itself says, then change to lyrics for acceptable rephrasing.
- Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 11:10, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "from the September recording sessions were in circulated" → "from the September 1974 sessions were circulated"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 11:10, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink The Bootleg Series per MOS:LINK2SECT
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 14:09, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- "including of" → "including the ones of"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 11:10, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "bitterness" and bemoans the failure of commentators to consider the original version" → "bitterness", and bemoaned the failure of commentators to consider the original"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 11:10, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "placed it 63rd in" → "placed the track 63rd in"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 11:10, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
Live performances edit
- Add a comma after dates where "at" follows them
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 21:38, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "was acoustic, and" → "was acoustic and" with the pipe
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 21:38, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "his soul,"[3] and Trager has said show" → "his soul".[3] Similarly, Trager has said the performance shows"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 21:38, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "and that Dylan's delivery" → "and observing how Dylan's delivery"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 21:38, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- "blooming bitterness" which featured" → "blooming bitterness", which featured"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 21:38, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
- Are you sure the last line quoted from the lyrics doesn't end with a full-stop in the source's quote marks? If so, alter here appropriately.
- Seems like it should, but the source has 'If she's passing back this way/ That would be too quick' he howls. 'Don't mention her name to me/ Cos that's a name that makes me sick'. I've capitalised "That" in the article to match the source. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 21:38, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
References in popular culture edit
- Retitle to In popular culture
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:25, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- ""classic heartbreak album"." → ""real heartbreak album"." per the source
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:25, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- Pipe Xfm to Radio X (United Kingdom)
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:25, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- Remove wikilink on Blood on the Tracks
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:25, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- "his favorite album." → "his favorite album of all time." per the source
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:25, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
Official album releases edit
- The ref col should be unsortable
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:32, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- Sound 80 should only be wikilinked on its first row
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:32, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- Billy Peterson should only be wikilinked in his first row
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:32, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- Drums should only be piped in their first row
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:32, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- A&R Studios should only be targeted on its first row
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:32, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
Cover versions edit
- "There is an Italian version by singer Francesco De Gregori, called "Non Dirle Che Non È Così" from" → "An Italian version of the song was recorded by singer-songwriter Francesco De Gregori, titled "Non Dirle Che Non È Così", for"
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 12:36, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- The soundtrack release is unsourced, plus shouldn't you add the album's release year in brackets?
- Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 12:36, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- "on his album Live at Sin-é." → "on his EP Live at Sin-é (1993)."
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 12:36, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Remove usage of the before Brazilian singer introduction
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 12:36, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Only the title is sourced as being changed so remove the lyrics part
- Removed. Many sources, none looked reliable. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 12:36, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
Notes edit
- Why does b not only have a full stop when none of the other notes do but also place it inside a song title?
- Fixed. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:27, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
References edit
- Copyvio score looks decent at 37.5%
- Refs 1 and 2 are duplicates, plus The Official Bob Dylan Site should not be in title
- Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:33, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Pipe Uncut to Uncut (magazine) on ref 4
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:33, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Refs 5 and 17 are duplicates, plus wikilink The Guardian on the first
- Amended. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:33, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink BBC on ref 6
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:33, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Fix MOS:QWQ issues with ref 8
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:33, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Pipe Penguin to Penguin Books on ref 11
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:33, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Remove the publisher from refs 12, 43, 44, 53 and 54
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:33, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Pipe Billboard to Billboard (magazine) on ref 13
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Should McFarland be piped to McFarland & Company on ref 15 or is that a different publisher?
- Piped. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Last name should be followed by first on ref 18 for consistency, plus pipe OUP Oxford to Oxford University Press
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Same comment as above regarding the name for ref 19, plus wikilink Random House
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink Rapid City Journal on ref 21
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink Chicago Tribune on ref 22
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink Critical Inquiry on ref 24
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink The Press Democrat on ref 25
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink Pittsburgh Post-Gazette on ref 26
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink The Paris News on ref 27
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink St. Cloud Times on ref 28
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink Philadelphia Inquirer on ref 29
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink The Sacramento Bee on ref 32
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- WP:OVERLINK of Rolling Stone on refs 34 and 36
- Fixed. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink The Sydney Morning Herald on ref 37
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink New English Library on ref 38
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink Rough Guides on ref 40
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Last name should be followed by first on ref 41, plus wikilink Scarecrow Press per MOS:LINK2SECT
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink Nanaimo Daily News on ref 45
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Wikilink The Observer on ref 47
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Pipe Slate to Slate (magazine) on ref 52
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- Either remove bjorner.com from ref 55 or remove the publisher and pipe the website to that article
- Removed bjorner.com. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- bbcamerica.com → BBC America on ref 56, citing as publisher instead with the wikilink
- Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 13:50, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
External links edit
- Are you sure Dylanchords is legit enough to be added here?
- Given the recent discussion at Wikipedia:Reliable_sources/Noticeboard/Archive_346#Dylanchords.com., probably better to remove this, so I have. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 18:59, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
Final comments and verdict edit
- On hold until all of the issues are fixed; great to have completed a review for the backlog already! --K. Peake 09:21, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- Many thanks for another patient, thorough and constructive review, K. Peake. I've replied to everything above. I guess the lead may need a bit more work, and another pending issue is that I wasn't able to find a source that I'm happy with for the genre. (Unless "ballad" counts as a genre.) If it's important to include a genre then there is a Billboard page that describes "Blood on the Tracks" as "folk rock", which I can add in. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:02, 5 July 2021 (UTC)
- BennyOnTheLoose Thanks for the response, I will look later when I'm done at work and use the 'folk rock' ref. --K. Peake 15:42, 6 July 2021 (UTC)
- BennyOnTheLoose ✓ Pass now, after seeing that the Billboard source calls the album as a whole folk rock but does not specifically link the song to this genre, I removed it and made a few other copy edits for you... great work! --K. Peake 21:07, 6 July 2021 (UTC)
- Thanks again, K. Peake. I really appreciate the effort you put into the review, and your advice. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 21:28, 6 July 2021 (UTC)