Talk:IG-11/GA1
Latest comment: 4 years ago by Hunter Kahn in topic GA Review
GA Review edit
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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 11:00, 13 April 2020 (UTC)
Comments
- " bounty hunter droid" sea of blue. I thought it would link to an article about bounty hunter droids.
- " an alien known" alien links to "extraterrestrial" but aren't pretty much all characters in Star Wars therefore alien?
- "the Child" - the should be inside the pipe.
- likewise for the Mandalorian.
- " IG-11 is later repaired" was he really "killed"? He's a droid....
- "nurse" doesn't need linking.
- "mutual work together" probably could drop either mutual or together, it's somewhat tautological to have both.
- " by reviewers and fans alike. He has been described as a fan favorite" maybe merge, " by reviewers and has been described as a fan favorite"...
- "appeared ... appearance" is clunky.
- "outlawed in the galaxy." throughout the galaxy (and which galaxy?)
- "In his first appearance on the show, IG-11" I don't think "on the show" is required.
- " known as The Mandalorian" the Mandalorian.
- That sentence has three "bounty"s
- "the asset to " first use of "asset", it's not clear this means the "unidentified living being" noted earlier.
- "a massive gunfight" I think "massive" is not encyclopedic in tone, perhaps "large".
- as "The Child" -> as the Child.
- "and kills him " again, wasn't he more "destroyed" than killed?
- "protect",[9] When the" grammar fail.
- Imperial Scout Troopers and "stormtroopers" (not capitalised) both link to the same article.
- "a Mandalorian armorer in " as this links to a specific character, probably best to put "a Mandalorian" inside the pipe.
- "the Terminator," put "the" inside the pipe.
- "among fans due to their familiarity with" tighten this to "among fans familiar with"
- Taika Waititi is overlinked.
- Put (MCU) after the first expanded version of it.
- Link MVP, this isn't a common term outside the US.
- Ref 31, spaced hyphen should be en-dash.
That's all I have. FWIW I thoroughly enjoyed the article, the above are suggestions which would probably propel it way beyond GA quality. Cheers. The Rambling Man (Stay indoors, stay safe!!!!) 11:55, 13 April 2020 (UTC)
- Thanks The Rambling Man, and thanks for the review! — Hunter Kahn 13:56, 13 April 2020 (UTC)
- This is excellent stuff. No hesitation in promoting. I'll probably take a look at another similar GAN of yours in due course. Cheers. The Rambling Man (Stay indoors, stay safe!!!!) 18:20, 13 April 2020 (UTC)
- Thanks very much for the review The Rambling Man! — Hunter Kahn 19:00, 13 April 2020 (UTC)
- This is excellent stuff. No hesitation in promoting. I'll probably take a look at another similar GAN of yours in due course. Cheers. The Rambling Man (Stay indoors, stay safe!!!!) 18:20, 13 April 2020 (UTC)