Talk:Hurricane Alma (1970)/GA1

Latest comment: 14 years ago by Juliancolton in topic GA Review

GA Review

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  • That day, it rapidly deepened under weather patterns conducive to development, including low tropospheric shear, strong upper-level outflow, and apparent eastward inflow. - This seems too technical for the casual reader (and even for me).
  • Avoid using "remained" twice in the same sentence. Any other way of wording that?
  • After moving offshore Virginia - "off the coast"?
  • The flooding forced the evacuation of 3,000 people in Oriente Province. - The lead says 2,000 people evacuated.
  • One girl died from lightning in Miami - A direct strike? I'd like a bit more clarification on this bit of info.

On-hold for now. You know the drill! –Juliancolton | Talk 15:42, 6 April 2010 (UTC)Reply

Got all of it, except for the lightning strike. That was from the NHC, who said 1 girl died from lightning in Miami, and that was it. I couldn't find anything in the newspapers about it, because there was a lot of severe weather elsewhere in the country. ♬♩ Hurricanehink (talk) 16:44, 6 April 2010 (UTC)Reply
Sounds good; passing. –Juliancolton | Talk 18:54, 6 April 2010 (UTC)Reply