Talk:Francis X. Talbot/GA1

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 11:28, 14 February 2020 (UTC)

Comments

• "entering the publishing world" feels a little whimsical, why not just "entering publishing" or is to break up the ..ing ...ing?
  • Yes, it was mostly aesthetic. I've rephrased to your recommendation, though. Ergo Sum 21:14, 17 February 2020 (UTC)
• "of which he became its " just "the" instead of "its" as you have "of which" already.
  • Done. Ergo Sum 21:14, 17 February 2020 (UTC)
• "previewed movies for the National Legion of Decency, and supported Franco's rule in Spain" these seem to be completely unrelated (to my ignorant self) and the sentence does go on a little, so perhaps split after Decency?
  • Broke it up. Ergo Sum 21:15, 17 February 2020 (UTC)
• "Philadelphia, Pennsylvania to" comma after Pennsylvania.
  • Done. Ergo Sum 21:16, 17 February 2020 (UTC)
• I don't think "fiction" needs linking. If there was a more specific link, like Catholic fiction then perhaps that would be useful.
  • Removed. Ergo Sum 21:16, 17 February 2020 (UTC)
• "In 1982, he founded" he was dead...
  • Accidentally transposed the digits. Ergo Sum 21:19, 17 February 2020 (UTC)
• Literary career section has eight "also"s perhaps needs a bit of variety in there?
  • Changed it up a bit. Ergo Sum 21:20, 17 February 2020 (UTC)
• I would expect to see ex officio in italics.
  • Done. Ergo Sum 21:21, 17 February 2020 (UTC)
• "until 1947. At the same time, during World War II' just reads a little odd, three consecutive timeframes...
  • Rearranged the sentences. Ergo Sum 21:22, 17 February 2020 (UTC)
• "on July 26, 1947 by " comma after 1947.
  • Done. Ergo Sum 21:22, 17 February 2020 (UTC)
• "in Annapolis, Maryland from " comma after Maryland.
  • Added. Ergo Sum 21:23, 17 February 2020 (UTC)
• "of Jesus,. New York:" spare comma here, could be recycled for the comment above...!
  • Removed. Ergo Sum 21:23, 17 February 2020 (UTC)
• Is there a space between quote marks in the last Writings bullet?
  • Yes, it appears the template inserts a space between two quotation marks. Ergo Sum 21:24, 17 February 2020 (UTC)

That's all I have. Cheers. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 14:23, 17 February 2020 (UTC)

@The Rambling Man: Thanks, as always, for your review. Much appreciated. Ergo Sum 21:25, 17 February 2020 (UTC)

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.